Today, I found out that the squeaking I've heard for the past three months, that I thought was my guinea pig, is actually my girlfriend cheating on me with my older brother. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, while watching my guinea pigs have sex, I got jealous. Yeah. It's been that long. FML
Today, I woke up to a squeaking noise and the feeling of something furry on my cheek. I smiled, thinking it was my guinea pigs nosing me awake. Then I remembered that my guinea pigs were in their cage on the other side of the room, and opened my eyes to see the biggest rat ever staring right at me. FML
Today, after assuring my best friend that his girlfriend would never cheat on him, I came home to my brother having loud sex with my best friend's girlfriend. FML
Today, I agreed to buy my girlfriend a piggle for Christmas. The pig is miniature. The noise it makes is not. Oh, and I just found out it's not living with her, but with me. FML
Today, my boyfriend admitted that he thinks I'm cheating on him, with my brother. FML
Today, my girlfriend's guinea pig managed to go down her shirt. I have been dating her for 3 weeks and I haven't even kissed her yet. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend of three years cheated on me with his ''sister-like friend." It's the girl I was always worried about, and half our arguments were about her. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend is cheating on me. With my mother. They were doing it for almost a year. FML
Today, marks the third week since my sister's guinea pig learned to masturbate. He humps his wheel and makes squeaking noises for five minutes, then rolls over on his side and pants heavily. He does it at least twice a night while I'm trying to sleep. FML
Today, my girlfriend started making pig noises during sex. FML
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Top comments
thaliah 15
Kick your brother's ass and dump the girl.
famvd 15
I'm assuming the squeaking sound is coming from the bed, not the brother...
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Comments (149)
Bunny_nutz_fml 11
follow up!!!
plunkit 6
Apparently Asian **** girls squeak like guinea pigs... not that I've ever seen Asian ****. Or any ****. Or cat videos.
berkeleyjake 13
3 months? Your girlfriend has been having sex with someone else in your house for 3 months and you couldn't figure it out? I guess she doesn't make the same noises with you or something.
rdnkchevy 9
Your brother is an ass and she is a bitch!!!
rex41e 9
Doing it under your nose is just wrong. Dumping time.
LatvianPride 16
What a nasty hoe-bag. Cheaters are the worst! I recommend telling your parents.
metalhead88 9
After 3 months of hearing a possible "guinea pig" you didn't think to actually check it out to make sure. Could of save ya a lot of time and emotion to find out earlier than later your ex is a hoe and your brother is fucknut
Freakophiliac 12
F*ck her, who needs a girl that sounds like a guinea pig anyway?
magymofucka 9
what i don't understand is why all three of you are in the same house at the same time & your girlfriend chooses to be in his room instead of yours.. isn't she supposed to be spending time with you?
fmlgiraffe 23
I've read this FML before - is it a repost?