Today, I found out all about my son's secret online double life. He's been moonlighting for two years as a male prostitute by the name of Peter Parker. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I found out my son's girlfriend is actually a webcam porn star he pays for private sessions. He’s somehow convinced himself they have a real relationship, and is spending thousands of pounds every week, on his credit card I may add. FML
Today, I found out my happily married father has been hiring escorts on-line for 3 years. FML
Today, I found out that my son has been telling me he's gay so we would allow the "female friend" who is actually his girlfriend to stay over. FML
Today, I found out the man I have been dating is my son’s principal. I found out by having to pick my suspended son up from school. FML
Today, I found out that my son is not really gay. He just told me that so I'd let him have girls in his bedroom. FML
Today, I found out that my son and his stepdad have bonded over covering for each others' misbehaviour so I don’t find out. Between them they have kept it secret that my son sneaks out at 1am to see his secret girlfriend, that my husband lost £500 gambling, that my son scratched the car… The list goes on. FML
Today, I learned that my son goes on online chat rooms and has sexual fantasy role-play. To make matters worse, the characters he uses are from My Little Pony. FML
Today, I found out my son was never accepted into the local university two years ago. He actually went out and got a job, and only lied about it so he could keep living in my house rent-free. The conniving bastard makes more than I do at my minimum-wage job. FML
Today, I found out that my son had sold his house key to one of his friends for half a packet of gum. Now there is someone out there who I have never met with full access to my house. My son is 16. FML
Today, I found out that the student tutor my son advised me to hire was my son's girlfriend. I have been paying her $20 an hour for the last 3 weeks to make out with my son in his room. FML
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Top comments
docscientist 10
He should've called himself "Peter Porker."
Nikki_ASW 0
Isn't that spiderman....?
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Comments (181)
charlie43 1
the Internet: where people have alternate lives, and where their parents go to complain about it
artc91 0
Well we can't call ourselves a rogue, dual-wield daggers and slashing the life out of mobs in real-life now, can we? :)
charlie43 1
you could but I heard that in real life there are no respawn points!
YacL 15
46- Scariest comment I ever read.
electricmaster 0
wtf?
charlie43 1
your son's secretly Peter Parker, and peter parker's secretly spiderman... identity-ception?
DarkMoon159 5
calm the **** down
CallMeHush 1
Spiderman, Spiderman, does anything a male **** can...
monkeywrench1 10
LMAO! Literarily!
rockell 0
at least his bn doing something productive
jordanian23 0
no he's doing something REproductive
lmaoatall 6
ummm op, kinda scared to ask this, but...well, here goes. he is legal, right? because he swore to me, I mean my friend, he was. a simple ya or nah will do. it sure would answer for alot of recent inquiries.
lilclare 0
everybody gets one.
chika_yeaah23 0
haha this reminds me of the family guy episode. "tell em Peter" "apparently everyone gets one" hahs
huntermc7 0
46, you have this mixed up. This is FML, not chatroulette.