Today, I found out all about my son's secret online double life. He's been moonlighting for two years as a male prostitute by the name of Peter Parker. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Love knows no boundaries
Today, I found out my son's girlfriend is actually a webcam porn star he pays for private sessions. He’s somehow convinced himself they have a real relationship, and is spending thousands of pounds every week, on his credit card I may add. FML
Today, I found out my happily married father has been hiring escorts on-line for 3 years. FML
Today, I found out that my son has been telling me he's gay so we would allow the "female friend" who is actually his girlfriend to stay over. FML
What are you doing here?
Today, I found out the man I have been dating is my son’s principal. I found out by having to pick my suspended son up from school. FML
Today, I found out that my son is not really gay. He just told me that so I'd let him have girls in his bedroom. FML
Bonding
Today, I found out that my son and his stepdad have bonded over covering for each others' misbehaviour so I don’t find out. Between them they have kept it secret that my son sneaks out at 1am to see his secret girlfriend, that my husband lost £500 gambling, that my son scratched the car… The list goes on. FML
Today, I learned that my son goes on online chat rooms and has sexual fantasy role-play. To make matters worse, the characters he uses are from My Little Pony. FML
Sneaky
Today, I found out my son was never accepted into the local university two years ago. He actually went out and got a job, and only lied about it so he could keep living in my house rent-free. The conniving bastard makes more than I do at my minimum-wage job. FML
Today, I found out that my son had sold his house key to one of his friends for half a packet of gum. Now there is someone out there who I have never met with full access to my house. My son is 16. FML
Today, I found out that the student tutor my son advised me to hire was my son's girlfriend. I have been paying her $20 an hour for the last 3 weeks to make out with my son in his room. FML
Top comments
docscientist 10
He should've called himself "Peter Porker."
Nikki_ASW 0
Isn't that spiderman....?
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Comments (181)
chaoticnh 0
what's moonlighting? probably a dumb q but still curious
trevishere 7
Urban Dictionary; a secondary job after a full time job. Usually at night.
seanders 10
Well Spiderman did shoot white sticky stuff at people all the time.
laurenv20 4
74- your picture is hilarious! xD
Magnimus 4
Well op, everybody has their own libido. I'd probably get paid to have sex with people too, except I don't have that much game. Although I do have some game. I actually have gotten paid a couple of times to have sex with people. It's really not that big of a deal. You get paid, you have sex. Everybody's happy.
toricomplez 0
its illegal too
HouseKeeping 0
I wish I knew what shirtty service was, it sounds so intriguing...
sleepyN 0
maybe he will give op a discount
sheethapins 13
His mom? I know you have it bad for other peoples moms Brian, but I think that's a "touch" too far.
HouseKeeping 0
Wow, my mom just found out I've been pretending to be a prostitute after 2 years, what a coincidence
Skatejock21 0
can he build spider webs, swing from building to building and save the world from the new goblin/Harry Osborn and Doc Ock/Dr. Otto Octavius?
rhysfucker 24
u sure it wasn't Peter porker?
Crazy4Christ 0
I have a double life too.