Today, I found out all about my son's secret online double life. He's been moonlighting for two years as a male prostitute by the name of Peter Parker. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I found out my son's girlfriend is actually a webcam porn star he pays for private sessions. He’s somehow convinced himself they have a real relationship, and is spending thousands of pounds every week, on his credit card I may add. FML
Today, I found out my happily married father has been hiring escorts on-line for 3 years. FML
Today, I found out that my son has been telling me he's gay so we would allow the "female friend" who is actually his girlfriend to stay over. FML
Today, I found out the man I have been dating is my son’s principal. I found out by having to pick my suspended son up from school. FML
Today, I found out that my son is not really gay. He just told me that so I'd let him have girls in his bedroom. FML
Today, I found out that my son and his stepdad have bonded over covering for each others' misbehaviour so I don’t find out. Between them they have kept it secret that my son sneaks out at 1am to see his secret girlfriend, that my husband lost £500 gambling, that my son scratched the car… The list goes on. FML
Today, I learned that my son goes on online chat rooms and has sexual fantasy role-play. To make matters worse, the characters he uses are from My Little Pony. FML
Today, I found out my son was never accepted into the local university two years ago. He actually went out and got a job, and only lied about it so he could keep living in my house rent-free. The conniving bastard makes more than I do at my minimum-wage job. FML
Today, I found out that my son had sold his house key to one of his friends for half a packet of gum. Now there is someone out there who I have never met with full access to my house. My son is 16. FML
Today, I found out that the student tutor my son advised me to hire was my son's girlfriend. I have been paying her $20 an hour for the last 3 weeks to make out with my son in his room. FML
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Top comments
docscientist 10
He should've called himself "Peter Porker."
Nikki_ASW 0
Isn't that spiderman....?
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Comments (181)
sheethapins 13
I think he did a birthday party for me, I just wanted a guy in a spiderman costume, but he only had on a spiderman mask.
bycf 0
cool.... he jst enjoying his sex life with small tips....
summerhot_fml 2
hahahahahahaha oh kids these days
sephoraprincess 7
peter pan peanut butter is pretty good though
princessRiRi97 0
Why did you think spiderman was shooting webs and hopping from building to building really fast...1) to get away from the cops chasing him...2) To be on time to please his next costumer!
supaisu 0
sweet.
doof_fisch 2
He may have caught something infectious. Take him to Doc Oc.
stallion2521 0
did you answer the ad??
redmnky21 8
omfg... ur son is spider man? sweet! watch out for the emo stage
sweetdreams999 0
lmfao. best FML ever.