Today, I faked being sick so I could weasel out of a chemistry test at school. Happy that I pulled it off, I posted my accomplishment on Facebook. I forgot that I'm friends with my parents. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I purposely set my phone off in class to make it seem like I had friends. FML
Today, to give the illusion that I have friends, I wrote an outrageous status on Facebook, and then pretended it was the result of a friend hacking my page, all in the hope that it would get comments, likes, or at least some attention. Nothing happened. FML
Today, I posted on my Facebook wall that I'd gotten into a huge bar fight and had the shit kicked out of me, all to avoid having to tell the truth, namely that I'd stayed home all night because nobody invited me out to party. FML
Today, I passed my math test with flying colors. My dad thought I had cheated, so he emailed the school and told them that I had. They lowered my grade. FML
Today, my brother and I got food poisoning because of the shady chicken subs we ate last night. Our mom thinks we're faking it and sent us to school anyway. I'm coming to you live from a school toilet while missing a test. FML
Today, I had to make up a story about my "friends" at school so my mom doesn't keep telling I'm a loser. FML
Today, I purposely went offline on Facebook chat, just so people would think I actually have a life. FML
Today, I thought I had gotten away with throwing a party while my folks were gone the night before. They came home and I was as sweet as possible. I could tell they were not buying it, but I thought I was in the clear. Later, they told me I had drunk-dialled them and spilled the beans. FML
Today, I failed school and ghosted all my teachers. Nobody knows, but I'm planning on telling my parents in a week. I'm fucked. FML
Today, I lied and told my friends I was a compulsive liar. Well, I think I lied. FML
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Top comments
Teabubbles 8
*In Red Forman's voice* "DUMBASS" .
lolololer 8
did they like your status? :P
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Comments (121)
jstorie95 8
Damn you're stupid
perdix 31
It's OK, parents are secretly OK with their slack-ass kids having an aversion to chemistry. It means their idiot kids aren't going to be building a meth lab anytime soon.
haniam16 6
No wonder you didnt want to take the chemistry test, youre on idiot.
Steve95401 49
Smart move Einstein!
ColonelPride16 0
Delete it? You can do that ya know..
kittenvks 11
This was so stupid OP that had the first six comments said that you're a dumbass I'd be willing to bet that every single one would still have gotten thumbed up and we're really not fond of repetition here :)
SeemsToFail 0
Thats the main thing I keep in mind when posting something
ebxr82nv 2
Facebook is the root of all evil!!!! I bet you've got hundreds of "friends" to you twit.
doumtabarnack 12
What a ******* dumbass
MrRuffyboots 0
In the voice of a powerful wizard, "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!"