By rabidfairy - 13/08/2014 02:04 - United States - San Francisco

Today, the man I have been in love with for years came to me with a beautiful ring and a heartfelt proposal. Too bad it ended with an eager, "So do you think he'll say yes?" FML
I agree, your life sucks 47 406
You deserved it 6 115

rabidfairy tells us more.

yes, you are correct. we've been friends since childhood and I've always known he was gay. just my luck that my heart would have none of it :/

Top comments


Well at least you weren't already married. FYL op.

meli1195 31

I don't think you understood why this is an fml

She's saying he was asking her if another man (the man in which he was proposing to) would say yes to the proposal. He wasn't proposing to OP, he was asking her opinion about one.

#16. I did not understand it before your explaination.

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Show it anyway

#26, because he's in love with a man and not a woman they wouldn't have been married at all ... EVER. Both of your comments makes ZERO sense.

@37 You've never heard of being in the closet? How about a beard? Protip: they don't always mean a storage space and facial hair. Not to mention he could be bisexual. On the other hand, I'd find it kind of weird that he'd propose to her if they were already married.

Are you actually dumb or pretending to be one!?!?

I don't think the beard/he could be in the closet scenarios apply here. It sounds to me as though this guy has been dating the man he wants to propose to for a while and OP has been secretly in love with him despite knowing that he's either gay or at the very least taken. I don't think OP ever dated this guy so I doubt she was his beard or he was in the closet.

I meant hypothetically, since 37 said it couldn't EVER happen.

Respect101 17

#43 I didn't know it was possible to be a dumb. I thought it was just a characteristic.

@26, you're missing the point. He was NEVER going to propose to her. He NEVER loved her. They were NEVER going to end up married.

@41, considering he's proposing he probably hasn't been in the closet for years. He might just be bi and she remained hopeful for years. Heck He could even just be gay and she wanted to change him. Unless the OP gives a follow up we won't know.

@64 But she's just saying that it's better to pine over the idea of him, knowing it could never be, then have been married with maybe a couple of kids and *then* finding out he'd rather be with a guy, like in a couple of previous FMLs.

cryssycakesx3 22

I think the girl just meant at least op isn't married, to any guy, find out he's gay etc

SkyGuy32 17

OP was in love with her gay friend and he asked her if she thought his boyfriend would marry him. They weren't romantically involved at the time.

I hope she was happy for him nonetheless.

incoherentrmblr 21

At least you didn't start screaming Yes!...

Damn. Seems like you never even had a shot. FYL indeed

Bad luck Brian: falls in love with homosexual

Kyle1dc 17

#83 Is there a female Bad Luck Brian? If not I'm gonna call this a Bad Luck Briana.

Sorry OP. I think it's time to move on and find another person who will truly appreciate you :)

meli1195 31

And that is attracted to the opposite sex

HammyBear13 8

Why do the one thats right for OP have to be a male? Just because she was in love with this male doesnt mean her next love interest has to be male.

She's probably straight. You're right but chances are her next love will still be a man.

I doubt the guy had any idea of OP's feelings towards him.

Found the "feminist." *coughmisandristcough*

sssayesss 5

I don't think this deserves to have so many negative votes; it is quite possible for anyone to be in a relationship with another human being that just so happens to be the same gender.

That comment implies that he led OP on or something

Didn't he tell you he was dating someone?

He must not have known she was in love with him, or he told her and she refused to believe it. :/

Respect101 17

Or maybe he said he was dating someone but forgot to mention it was another guy.. the possibilities go on...

I'd assume they were friends for years since she says she was in love with him for that long. He probably came to her to see if his proposal speech was good enough, not to confuse or tease her. Obviously since he showed her the ring beforehand and asked her opinion, he would have also told her previously about his boyfriend.

yes, you are correct. we've been friends since childhood and I've always known he was gay. just my luck that my heart would have none of it :/

kotake 7

I think anyone can relate to an unrequited love. A great person who is perfect for you but is not a romantic option. It isn't a "gay" thing. I think you just need to remind yourself that he just isn't an option. With a lot of unrequited loves we hold that in the right circumstances (even if those circumstances are as rare as all the planets in our solar system aligning) the unrequited loves will transform into a requited one. I was in the same situation. I'm gay and liked a straight guy. But it helps to realize that if you're not an option for him, therefore he's not an option for you. After all, if x doesn't equal y, then how can y = x? After that you may feel hurt, like "why aren't I an option for him, aren't I enough?". But it's not because you have any flaw, it's just because of reality. He isn't attracted to you because it's you specifically. You could be anyone else personality or look-wise, as long as you are female he would not feel an attraction. It'll take time. But if you keep remembering all of that it should get easier. It's nothing to get angry or hurt about. Honestly anger/hurt is the wrong way to go because if you feel that way, and then he acts sweet or caring, it muddles up the feelings, creates knots, and you have to take more time to untangle them,

Wow, if you knew he was gay the whole time then why not try to move on sooner? You knew you never had a chance with him.

that is quite unfortunate. don't worry though, you'll move on and find someone who's interested in the opposite sex. :)

I'm so sorry. That sucks big time. I hope you find someone you fall madly in love with and both you and your friend live happy lives.

Might be an asshole, but at least I'm not holding onto a fantasy and then cry about it when it doesn't come to fruition.

I don't think I've ever heard better advice. That was perfect.

Welp, if he's gay then he's gay. Is it possible of him to have liked a female? Yes. It does happen. But if you care for him, you should be happy for him and support him, not pity yourself (no offence. I know that sounds harsh). It's about him, not you. But now you can take your life into your hands and go out and make that connection with someone else. Being regretful of someone else's orientation can make it seem like there's something wrong with it. I hope you can support him and find someone who connects with you in the future!

Soo pretty much what #129 said. Which was better written and doesn't sound as snappy.

I think the fact that he asked if "he will say yes" indicates the dude you are in love with is gay and you never stood a chance anyway. So don't see how you're all heartbroken when you knew he was gay?

Nope sorry. No such thing as "bi" just "confused" IMHO.

ahhh so youre one of those homophobic assholes. bi is a thing. it exists. its annoying how we get shit from both straight and gay people. Im 24, still like both, not at all confused.

#11 bisexuals just means attracted to both sexes. Obviously there "is such thing".

11, Maybe you should take your own name as an advice for yourself. I'm pretty sure that people who are bi-sexual, are far from confused, since they know they're attracted to both sexes.

Sometimes the heart wants what it wants even when it doesn't make sense. And even though she probably knew she'd never have a chance, she probably still had that 2% of her that was hoping maybe someday. My advice OP is to move on and find someone that will make you as happy as his fiancé makes him.

Either he's bi or pans, she loved him anyway, or it was a typo.

I hate when people I'm crushing on turn out to be gay, but they usually just tell me that to make me go away.

Don't feel too bad, there's someone out there for you! At least you know now it's not him :)

The first ever case of a woman being friend zoned...

Drag0nb0rn 22

Please take your neck beard and fedora back to reddit with the rest of you "nice guys"