Miscellaneous: Today, I decided to use fake tan, seeing as I am so pale. Everywhere...

By OompaLoompa - 18/06/2009 13:32 - United Kingdom

Today, I decided to use fake tan, seeing as I am so pale. Everywhere I have been today, I have had children behind me. Singing the Oompa Loompa song. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 274

You deserved it 62 263

Father's Day: Daddy Chicken or Daddy Wet Hen?
Stories of extraordinary fathers, sometimes awkward but always hilarious. A family read! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

New, from L'Oréal!

By oompaloompa - 28/10/2019 12:00

Today, I used a self-tanning towelette to help even out my tan lines and disguise my vitiligo a bit. Now my stomach is orange and my spots are even more noticeable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 310

You deserved it 456

By Sally - 22/08/2011 00:17 - United States

Today, I got a spray tan. The lady asked what shade I wanted to be, and joking, I said the darkest. She took it seriously. Now no one can recognize me, and I have work tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 897

You deserved it 69 400

Soft as snow

By Snow White - 22/05/2017 22:00

Today, I'm so pale that I managed to get a sunburn while sitting in a bus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 043

You deserved it 419

By CasperTheFriendlyGhost - 14/07/2016 17:11 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I was told to rub in my sunscreen because I looked like a ghost. I wasn't wearing any. I'm just that white. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 681

You deserved it 1 313

Lava lamp

By Kathleen Verhaegen - 30/04/2020 20:00

Today, I'm so pale, my boss asked me whether I light up in the dark. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 378

You deserved it 292

Trumped

By Anonymous - 23/10/2019 18:00

Today, I decided to get a spray tan. I'm now more orange than the current president of the United States. FML

I agree, your life sucks 803

You deserved it 1 720

By miss tomato - 08/06/2012 16:36 - United States

Today, I was really badly sunburnt, so I put on some after-sun. The only type we have has glitter in it, and now I look like a sparkling tomato. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 498

You deserved it 5 666

Good one, you little shit

By WalkingTalkingCarrot - 27/06/2011 02:15 - United Kingdom

Today, my 15 year-old brother, visiting me for the weekend, thought it would be a great idea to switch my expensive moisturiser for fake tan cream. I'm going to work in 12 hours. I'm fluorescent orange. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 060

You deserved it 5 124

By fishwizard - 02/06/2017 20:00

Today, I used a tanning bed at my local gym for the first time. I went in for the full allowed time of 9 minutes. I went to school after and everybody said I looked like Trump. Confused, I went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. My skin is orange and matches with my bleach blonde hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 733

You deserved it 3 958

By xolaurennnn - 22/05/2015 15:55 - United States

Today, it was hot out, so I wore shorts. My dad took one look at me and said, "Your thighs are so pale, it's like staring into the sun". FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 257

You deserved it 3 301

TheDarkoprince 0

Thursday 18 June 2009 19:43

Oompa, Loompa, doom-pa-dee-da Oompa, Loopma, doom-pa-dee-do

nicolexsmile 0

Thursday 18 June 2009 19:40

YDI

Comments

sugarcakebomb 0

Thursday 18 June 2009 21:17

YDI this is something that you can't go cheap with. You need to shell out some $$ and do it the right way at a salon. Trust me, I'm in Miami and see this happen ALL OF THE TIME.

JessieRaye 0

Thursday 18 June 2009 21:18

Ha, I just read it again, while I drink Irn Bru. YOUR FIZZY, YOUR GINGER, YOUR PHENOMENALLLLL!!! ♪

deweyd8855 3

Thursday 18 June 2009 21:20

What are you, a guidette? They must have guidos and guidettes in England, because they are the only people who think that fake tanner looks good.

Avenging_Angel 0

Thursday 18 June 2009 21:20

Fake tans are so lame. A little bit of sun doesn't hurt anyone, unless you're one of those redhead albino people who burn after like ten minutes in the sun (damn that sucks) Either go out in the sun, or embrace your paleness. It looks horrible when people who look like they should be pale are tan instead...

SeeAlsoJaime 0

Thursday 18 June 2009 21:22

Shouldve just stayed pale. It looks 10x better anyways. Porcelain is the new oompa loompa. And at least you acknowledge that your tan looks like shit, unlike the ***** who walk around with orange skin and think they look like Megab Fox or something.

IllegalLight 0

Thursday 18 June 2009 21:28

my bullshit alarm is going off...

iKaite 0

Thursday 18 June 2009 21:29

why does she deserve it? It isnt like she wound anyone up just so they would sing Oompa Loompa behind her. Your prob just jealous cos a good FML got posted and not urs. I think its hilarious.