Today, I decided to quit smoking. During my lunch break, I tried to ash the KitKat bar that was in my hand after I took a bite. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I quit smoking. My son came home with an ashtray he made in arts and crafts class. FML
Today, I decided to quit smoking. My wife conveniently decided on the same day that she was going to start smoking. FML
Today, I decided to quit smoking and put on a nicotine patch. I decided to have one last cigarette and ended up sick at the doctors with nicotine poisoning. FML
Today, I was holding a lit cigarette in one hand and a lollipop in the other. Guess which one I licked? FML
Today, after secretly smoking for more than two years, I decided to quit. I came home from work to see my wife holding a pack and asking me what was it doing behind the toilet seat. FML
Today, I gave up smoking. A few hours later, I caught myself daydreaming about brutally killing a guy that gave me a mean look at the bus. Maybe I should go back to smoking. FML
Today, as I was smoking a cigarette I realized that it's time to quit. This realization came to me after a particularly violent coughing bout forced not tar out of my lungs, but rather poo out of my bum. FML
Today, I finally found a reason to quit smoking. I threw my cigarette butt out the window and it blew back in, went down the back of my pants, and burnt my butt in 3 different places. FML
Today, I found I had rolled, and was smoking a cigarette without realising it after proudly entering my third day of being a non-smoker. FML
Today, I made the decision to quit smoking while I was driving in my car. So I took my pack, crushed it and threw it out the window. I felt triumphant about this change I was making in my life, until the cop I didn't know was behind me gave me a ticket for littering. FML
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Top comments
MermaidSongXOXO 6
This is the kind of FML that you can't really blame the OP at all. It's actually really inspiring that you decided to quit smoking :) Quitting is tough, and it takes a while to get out of the habit (hence trying to ash a kitkat bar). But, I, and I'm sure a lot of other FML users, are proud. Fun fact: every cigarette you smoke takes eleven minutes off your life.
ninja_dino 0
good job on quitting good luck
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Comments (412)
Webb_Div_Clemm 0
bahahahahaaa dickheeeeeaaaaaadd!!! thats funny as!!! pmsl, very nicely done :P
batosai33 0
which is exacyltly why it is time to quit
DaveOnDope 4
Thank (deity) I stopped smoking, well, tobacco anyway.
peacelivs 0
eewweeweweeweeeeqwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww your super gross!!!!!!!!!!!
phantomdonut 0
Good for you for stopping smoking! You can do this! My dad used the stop-smoking patches and ate certs mints like crazy. He still - five years later - keeps a box of certs or one of those bulky packs of gum in his t-shirt pocket. It looks and feels like a cigarette box, and the mint helps. Good luck! Your lungs and heart will thank you! *applause!*
pepolshet 0
Wow **** you tobacco-nazis the man has the right to smoke whenever he wants, so shut your painted holes you 16 old teens.
sgaske 3
This was hilarious OP. I've been in your shoes. Keep fighting the good fight!
shadowsbane 0
You dumbass, the Kit Kat doesn't ash if it isn't lit. Haha, just kidding OP. Good luck to quitting. :)
parya94 0
wow
Alphette 0
I did the same thing, only with a french fry when i was quitting.. don't worry OP you'll find yourself doing little habbits like this while quiting.. it does get better over time.. good luck