Today, I decided to quit smoking. During my lunch break, I tried to ash the KitKat bar that was in my hand after I took a bite. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I quit smoking. My son came home with an ashtray he made in arts and crafts class. FML
Today, I decided to quit smoking. My wife conveniently decided on the same day that she was going to start smoking. FML
Today, I decided to quit smoking and put on a nicotine patch. I decided to have one last cigarette and ended up sick at the doctors with nicotine poisoning. FML
Today, I was holding a lit cigarette in one hand and a lollipop in the other. Guess which one I licked? FML
Today, after secretly smoking for more than two years, I decided to quit. I came home from work to see my wife holding a pack and asking me what was it doing behind the toilet seat. FML
Today, I gave up smoking. A few hours later, I caught myself daydreaming about brutally killing a guy that gave me a mean look at the bus. Maybe I should go back to smoking. FML
Today, as I was smoking a cigarette I realized that it's time to quit. This realization came to me after a particularly violent coughing bout forced not tar out of my lungs, but rather poo out of my bum. FML
Today, I finally found a reason to quit smoking. I threw my cigarette butt out the window and it blew back in, went down the back of my pants, and burnt my butt in 3 different places. FML
Today, I found I had rolled, and was smoking a cigarette without realising it after proudly entering my third day of being a non-smoker. FML
Today, I made the decision to quit smoking while I was driving in my car. So I took my pack, crushed it and threw it out the window. I felt triumphant about this change I was making in my life, until the cop I didn't know was behind me gave me a ticket for littering. FML
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Top comments
MermaidSongXOXO 6
This is the kind of FML that you can't really blame the OP at all. It's actually really inspiring that you decided to quit smoking :) Quitting is tough, and it takes a while to get out of the habit (hence trying to ash a kitkat bar). But, I, and I'm sure a lot of other FML users, are proud. Fun fact: every cigarette you smoke takes eleven minutes off your life.
ninja_dino 0
good job on quitting good luck
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Comments (412)
Haileyw15 0
Haha
raisonbread 0
look on the bright side: if you under 15 and you get lung cancer st. judes can help you. :D
Haileyw15 0
Where are you children at tonight, Hope? That sounds a little creepy...
jackg 0
you can bake cookies with weed in them same affect except no bad smell or messed up lungs
water2210 0
that's nasty my dad smokes in the car and I have a 1 year old sister and when we get in the car her carseat smells like smoke :(
x805xUnknown 6
43-WINS!!!!!!!! And I highly agree; weed is 100 times better than cigarettes.
GoSmegma 0
Why do people approve such retarded fml's?!
SlicNic007 0
i had no idea so many beautiful girls looked at fml
iWearTightPants 0
כי אני יודעת שאתה רוצה אותי מותק, אני חושב שאני רוצה אותך יותר מדי 'אני חושבת שאני אוהבת אותך מותק', אני חושב גם אני אוהב אותך אני כאן כדי להציל את הילדה, בא להיות בעולם של שיידי אני רוצה לגדול יחד, בוא ניתן לפרוש את אהבתנו אתה יודע שאתה רוצה אותי מותק, את יודעת שאני רוצה אותך גם הם קוראים לי סופרמן, אני כאן כדי להציל
RedPillSucks 31
song lyrics seem irrelevant to the discussion
ScReWStoNe 0
Now every time you feel like smoking just eat a Kit-Kat