Today, I came home to find my younger daughter left her silly band collection on the carpet in front of the fireplace. I now have melted unicorns and princesses stuck in my carpet. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I came home from work to find my five year old daughter drawing unicorns on the wall. The same wall that I had to repaint last week because it had puppies on it. FML
Today, my daughter somehow got a hold of the lighter we keep on top of the fridge. I found this out when she snuck up behind me and thought it would be fun to set my hair on fire. FML
Today, my girlfriend tried to clean out the fireplace with a vacuum cleaner, she sucked up a bunch of embers which set the vacuum on fire. After a crying for a bit, she went back to finish cleaning up only to find that some embers she dumped in a bucket melted through and set part of the carpet on fire. FML
Today, my daughter lost a tooth. I wanted to make the Tooth Fairy experience extra special, so I dipped her doll's feet in paint to leave “tracks” from the window to her bed. As I was adding the finishing touches and spreading glitter, I tripped on a toy, faceplanted and lost my own tooth. FML
Today, I came home from work to find white fabric and crystals all over the apartment floor. I followed the trail of destruction to my bedroom, where my roommate had left our closet door open. Apparently, her cats decided that my wedding gown was to be their newest conquest. FML
Today, I found my 6 year-old daughter upstairs, lying on the floor with scissors. She was giving, "the carpet a haircut." FML
Today, my daughter tried to cover up her relapse into pyromania by explaining to me that the reason our carpet caught on fire was because a hot coal somehow worked its way free from the fireplace. Our fireplace is electric. FML
Today, I babysat my niece and thought a quick shower would be fine. I left her watching cartoons with a blanket and returned to find she’d used washable paints on the carpet and her hands, leaving tiny colorful footprints to the couch. Her proud smile made me forgive the mess, but I spent the evening scrubbing. FML
Today, my daughter threw a can of hairspray into the fireplace because she saw someone do it on YouTube. FML
Today, I got home to the smell of permanent marker and the discovery that my roommate's little sister had drawn flower petals around every polka dot she could reach on my walls. I just put up the wallpaper last weekend. FML
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Top comments
Fortuitous 0
Watch that become the next big thing in the carpet industry: The Silly Band Carpet, only available from Empire Today!
lildevil963 0
in da hood we wear dem getto silly bands tht only look like circles
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Comments (145)
Morgansayshi 0
you have a magical carpet!
mahimalil 0
^ LOL
xFalzz 0
^This They look horrible when worn.
skimonkey96 0
bwahahahaha that's hilarious!
fakeaccountX 6
Unicorns rock. Don't hate.
UrLiFsuX 4
Seahorses! Forever!!
FirstBornUnicorn 0
Hell yeah. Unicorn power!!!
Lx416 0
that's soo salty lmao -Ł
L1v3_L0v3_Lau9h 18
Salty?
DakotaCat 4
Oh yah ya betcha real hard to get rid of.
proski 0
oh no I don't give a crap
wwerulez14 6
YDI. Shaped rubber bands. That guy who created them is now a millionaire. For SHAPED RUBBER. Some people work their entire lives, and never become that wealthy. Some guy shapes rubber bands and becomes a millionaire after like 4 weeks. Kind of funny isn't it? :P
keepmeonthedl 7
Sad is what it is. They're ridiculously popular. Why? Because that's what happens with fads . I'm probably one of very few teenage girls who have never had or worn a silly band. There stupid. That is all :)
worldclass 0
I'm almost nearly sort of close to positive that it was a young boy 16>
Emrysa 1
YDI for leaving a child unsupervised around a fireplace.
ChibiChibi_fml 28
It doesn't say how old the child is. Silly bands are popular with people well into their twenties.
ChibiChibi_fml 28
That may sound stupid but my mother refers to me as her youngest or her younger daughter and I'm already in my twenties, so it doesn't mean a whole lot that she said her younger daughter left her silly bands in front of the fireplace.
Emrysa 1
I'm going to assume that if her child was that old, she wouldn't be stupid enough to leave thin plastic bands that close to a fireplace, but I realize there are some really stupid people out there.
ChibiChibi_fml 28
There is also the possibility that she didn't mean to leave them there. I have set stuff down with the intention of picking back up and been distracted by stuff before. She may have had them in her hand or been wearing them and set them down without really thinking about it. That wasn't really my point anyway, I was just saying that perhaps her daughter is old enough to be alone near a fireplace and just did something without thinking.
KikiThePug 0
Who says the OP left their daughter unsupervised?
ChibiChibi_fml 28
That too, it doesn't say that the child was unsupervised. There are many children who still have both parents. The girl could have been home with her dad. She could have a nanny. Her grandparents could be living with them. There are a ton of possibilities.
skyttlz 32
I don't like silly bands I have some and idk what to do with them