Love: Today, for the very first time I got it on with my girlfriend....

By Mr Eek - 25/10/2008 16:57

Today, for the very first time I got it on with my girlfriend. Unfortunately, afterwards I had a terrible tummy ache and let out a very noisy fart. I'm not sure she'll still be my girlfriend tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 590

You deserved it 12 449

Summer: Sun, Sea and Blunders
Summer anecdotes where the sun shines... and blunders are never far away! More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 27/01/2013 06:03 - United States - Demorest

Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, I felt a sharp pain in my stomach, and had to run to the bathroom to evacuate my bowels. She heard the horrible sounds, and I doubt I'll ever be able to seduce her again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 062

You deserved it 3 910

Nice outing

By Anonymous - 07/12/2019 05:00 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I decided to treat my girlfriend by eating her out. After a while I thought she was going to cum, but instead she farted in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 459

You deserved it 779

Multitasking

By Anonymous - 14/11/2012 21:28 - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 260

You deserved it 6 810

Gross out competition

By shattysituation - 31/12/2012 22:36 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try a new place to eat. On our way home we both had upset stomachs. As we raced into the house we realized neither of us could hold it any longer. Having only one bathroom, I let her go first. She exploded on the toilet and I exploded in my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 452

You deserved it 4 067

The trumpets of doom

By Anonymous - 15/12/2024 15:00 - Belgium - Merendree

Today, I went to meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. While I was at their house I got a tummy ache, then had loud explosive diarrhea. Twice. They definitely heard it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 538

You deserved it 98

By CHStennis_4 - 03/09/2011 04:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 320

You deserved it 3 867

Mission successful

By Anonymous - 07/02/2022 22:00

Today, my girlfriend and I did a 69 for the first time and I was on the bottom. When she orgasmed, not only did she fart, a bit of poo came out with the fart, and actually went up my nose. I’ve gone through a whole box of tissues blowing my nose, but I can still smell it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 965

You deserved it 304

By Haley. - 26/03/2010 23:58 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have intercourse for the first time. One minute into it, he got nervous and farted. What's worse is that his fart scared him, and he asked "What was that?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 320

You deserved it 6 541

Put the booze down

By Anonymous - 13/08/2020 14:01

Today, I shat myself in front of my girlfriend's family, after drinking too much the previous night and waking up with major stomach problems. FML

I agree, your life sucks 564

You deserved it 2 100

By pikachu - 20/01/2009 20:00 - United States

Today, my girlfriend farted in her sleep, woke me up because it was so damn loud, and my room smelt like rotten noodles for about an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 594

You deserved it 4 547

UGADAWG34 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 14:32

she's a **** if she leaves you for that...

SillyAsh 0

Thursday 26 February 2009 23:56

I'm sure if she really wanted to be your girl, she wouldn't dump you for farting. I fart after sex and in the mornings with my boyf. It's not a big deal.

Comments

UGADAWG34 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 14:32

she's a **** if she leaves you for that...

starwarsguy330 0

Sunday 8 May 2011 22:43

totally!

stef108 3

Monday 15 August 2011 0:10

Agreed

Dilwann 27

Wednesday 26 December 2012 14:07

I don't get why people make such a big deal out of farting nowadays >.<

MilkyFilmz 26

Wednesday 29 May 2013 23:17

I don't really understand either, I mean, EVERYONE does it.

fuzzbutt 0

Friday 20 February 2009 3:26

My boyfriend and I play the doorknob / safety game all the time! http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=safety+game

SillyAsh 0

Thursday 26 February 2009 23:56

I'm sure if she really wanted to be your girl, she wouldn't dump you for farting. I fart after sex and in the mornings with my boyf. It's not a big deal.

amandajlucas2015 2

Wednesday 4 April 2012 23:11

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

samir1996 0

Sunday 16 September 2012 21:23

Why do you reply to the OP by replying to one of the comments? I see people doing this all the time and I don't understand it.

robotiick7 23

Wednesday 18 December 2013 20:19

94- it's to get their comment up to near the top so it will be noticed

laurades8 0

Thursday 5 March 2009 5:19

How long have you even been going out? And not to be mean but seriously, what guy says 'tummy ache' anymore? o.o Besides that. It's no big deal. I'd think it was actually kinda cute. Your human. no getting around that. So don't worry, <3