By Hate2Date - 05/04/2010 05:14 - United States

Today, fifteen minutes after dinner was served, my blind date says "It's good that you're smart. Not to be rude, but most girls aren't. I mean, at some point, I'm going to pull my dick out of your mouth and then it's good if you have something interesting to say." Check please. FML
I agree, your life sucks 47 825
You deserved it 8 180

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Wow, got yourself a real winner there, apparently he's not quite as brilliant as he thinks you are... Not so sure if I'd say FYL or YDI, but it's funny all the same


jayrock65 0

lol.. laying on the charm. Hes a keeper

fertie226 1

why do all boys treat girls like slam pigs?? have some ******* class!

faxe 0

no we don't 26, it's her fault if she went on a blind date.

At least he was up front about how much of a douchebag he was. Most people wait till after the wedding.

its spelt cheque not check. dumb bitch.

faxe 0

apparently check is acceptable, but I know how you feel..... been there.

Smilzen 0

Regional spelling, dude. People come from aaallll around the world to publish the latest story of their lives' inevitable downward spiral, and if they're American they'll (we'll) spell it "check". And since we win all the wars, we spell it the right way. Savvy, chavvy?

He could have been joking. Some people just have an inappropriate sense of humor. Don't get offended so easily. If a girl told me that she was going to have to pull her clit out of my mouth at some point, I wouldn't bitch about it. I would just take it as a joke.

rctack 0

it's sound logic I don't see the FAIL

No, they aren't. They are sandwich-making dick massagers. Now get back in the kitchen and make me a sandwich!

Win all the wars? The right way? You're a huge continution to why I'm gettin out of the US military after 7 long years if service to my country.

Im an actor, those are hidden cameras and your on Disaster Date !

49, you started off well but ended on an arrogant note. Won Vietnam did you? I must've been misinformed.

where the hell do u live... I wanna hang with him

Aren't blind dates terrible sometimes.. err most times? I once had someone say "Either you makeout with me right now or I'm going to whip out my dick and MAKE you suck it!!!!" People scare me:( Atleast it's over now OP, let's hope he won't stalk you or anything.

have some class and spank dat ass!!! FTW! XD

supernice 0

65 thank you for those seven years

Simplyjulie 0

#26 I agree.. Men should treat women equally.. wth is going on with sexism??

raikou95 0

for some reason the sexism is really bad on fmls lol. I really don't know why can anyone explain? or am I just blind in the real world?

ballsmahoney 0

ahhah that made me laugh out loud! if I was the unlucky person sitting next to your table I would have been in hysterics ahah

ButterflyBaby 0

ewww. wow. what a whiny perverted bitchhh.

ButterflyBaby 0

I wouldve just stood up and left. make him pay for it.

If you didn't let us(by us I mean the ones that do) then they(ones that do) wouldn't, so it's not fair to say those guys are to blame, take some responsibility and step up! OP. Dudes got problems, excuse yourself to the restroom and out the window with ya'.

missmurderx 8

lol 69; that's what I was thinking :D

RKftw 0

the op was prob just ugly as **** and decided he would might as well have some fun

Smilzen 0

A little late to the punch, I'm sorry. A.) it was a joke. They're all jokes, and American superiority jokes are even better because you inflame the European bloc. This is why I'm destined for the UN. Of course we haven't won ALL the wars, and of course our spelling of "check" wouldn't be any better for it. Though I AM getting a little weary of the irony-defficient and easily offended. B.) I'm about to head INTO the military! That's kind of a non sequitur and I'm sure nobody cares. Enjoy your day.

kelleyb323 0

this is straight out of a movie. I bet you can't guess which.

Silense_is_loud 0

gigity gigity gigity goo alllllrrrrriiiiiittttteeeeee!!!!!!!!!! lmao

26 - why do all girls think that making a duckface is classy?? don't be a hypocrite

Skwisgaar123 0

and its is spelled it's but we all make mistakes.

Killerblonde41 2

that is a bit sexist... but some girls deserve it because they are really bitchy, annoying and stupid... I'm a girl and even I see that.... :/

i see the glass as half empty even when its full...

SkeetMaGeet637 1
bmdoc9425 0

why do all girls have to lump all guys into one collective group?!? it's called a joke. maybe girls should stop being so goddamn sensitive... but that's to far for a first date. unless he purposely was trying to get her to leave.

bmdoc9425 0

that was directed at number 26 btw.

MichieBabiie 0

So did you say something interesting?

ilikeyouuu 0

You are a moron. That is how we spell it in America... Besides, why are you getting all scary angry for spelling? Tard...

good work minions. now go F**K HER!! * cheers*

raineydayes 0

3!!!! (if anyone wonders why I said obviously can count!)

72 - The big picture, please. The US, we created modern Democracy - therefore, we win. Vietnam was a fluke, anyways - wasn't even our war, so therefore we cannot 'lose', we just 'failed to aid.' Kicked Britain's ass, kicked Russia's ass (cold war), would've kicked Cuba's ass if we sent some Americans instead of Cubans... U.S = WIN.

61... and THATS why you're the only one massaging your dick! but this is freakin hilarious- OP don't be such a priss you know you were gonna suck it anyway!

jcap113 4

omfg!!! u r such a steryotypical guy lmfao!!!!

#72 Moron. Greece "invented" democracy. FYI.

pinktrapdoor 0

49- America wins all the wars? so what was Vietnam, a play date?

raymm 1

Win all the wars, except Vietnam, Iran, Afganistan.

#26 we don't treat hot girls like "slam pigs" just ones that think their hot and pose like a ******* dumbass... like you

dstanek 0

Wow, got yourself a real winner there, apparently he's not quite as brilliant as he thinks you are... Not so sure if I'd say FYL or YDI, but it's funny all the same

sxe1215 0

ydi for smelling like shit. take a shower and make me a sammich

mailto:[email protected]?subject=Any%20BBW%20fans%20for%20anal%3F%20-%20w4m%20-%2020%20(Downtown%20Seattle)&

cady2 0

if you actually look at sone of the words in that link/code nonsense, it makes you wonder. rofl.

#9 - holy ******* anal orgy batman! better start checking your comments before hitting "send". roflmao

ButterflyBaby 0

is300k is looking for hookers. yummy. :p

ilysweetcupcake 1

hahaha sorry OP but he sounds funny.

callicoat 0

we all can tell that you like cupcakes..... fatass.

excuse me but, what right do you have to just openly insult someone like that? for all other people know, you could be a 300 pound insecure control freak who can't leave their home in fear of, oh I don't know.. running out of food? and she ISNT fat anyway. you really need to recheck your idea of fat. so think next time before you attempt to insult someone, alright? (:

Callicoat, stfu. Pond scum. And that totally sucks, OP.

blaaaaakely 0

callicut, that was completely rude and uncalled for. you look like a fool. don't take your obvious insecurities out on a complete stranger. and besides, I think she's cute as a little button :) not to be creepy or anything. anyway, please keep your retard babble to yourself. you aren't funny or witty, jackass.

blaaaaakely 0

straight as a nail, actually :) thinking peopl of the same se are cute doesn't make you bi, as far as I'm concerned. it's not like I said "damn bitch show me dat azz" or something ;)

faxe 0

alas...*looses temporary excitement* wait a min! nails can be bent :)

Lol you guys are funny. But yeah, no girls would be like "let me tap dat azz gurlll." you guys are gentler.

b1acksharpi3mark 0

I'm not sure about that, crono. I know a bi girl who acts like that. I am also bi, so she tends to target me. *shudders*

ButterflyBaby 0

b1ack, I can see why you turned bi...

sometimes I feel like typing 'Special First for Trying' like teachers used to say in elementary school.

blaaaaakely 0

hahaha, get a sense of humor :) I thought what he said was moderately funny

I also thought it was a humorous way of saying he likes intelligent women.

Who doesn't like intelligent people in general?

:S you could talk about how his dick defines the word "small beyond all others". that would be of his best interest.

hhaley 0

^win. or "no worries, with a dick as small as yours, I can speak intelligently and clearly with it still in my mouth". lol

joshraider 0

66, nice! that made me laugh haha