Today, after weeks of eating in the same restaurant, I finally worked up the nerve to ask the super-cute cashier for her phone number. "Aw, how cute. Do you have an older brother?" FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I had dinner at a local fast-food joint. There's an employee there that I usually talk to and flirt with, so I thought maybe it was time to ask for her number. After a small conversation and almost getting to the point, she told me, "I'm 17." I'm 23. FML
Today, I went to a restaurant with some friends. I noticed a very cute waitress about my age, so I walked over to her and asked if she had a boyfriend. The extremely fit, attractive waiter standing next to her immediately turned, held out his hand and goes, "Yeah. Meet me." FML
Today, while working as a cashier, I was flirting with this cute girl. When I asked her if she had her store card she said, "No", paused, then said "Can I give you my number?" I said, "Sure, that would be awesome, do you want mine?" She said no. I didn't know I could just enter the card number. FML
Today, I felt fairly depressed about being single for the holidays during work. This cute girl came to my register asking about our sales ad. After telling her we had no copies, she asked for my number. I shouted: "Finally, someone wants to go out with me." She wanted the store's number to call. FML
Today, I was working at my job as cashier. This really attractive girl who often comes in walked in, so I mustered up the courage to ask her out by writing my number on a dollar bill. She paid and the amount her change happened to be a dollar. I go to hand her the money when she sees it and says, "Keep the change!" FML
Today, the really cute guy who asked for my number last night texted me. He wanted to know if he could get my friend's number, because he'd been too shy to ask her directly. FML
Today, a girl I've been crushing on for over a year finally gave me her number. I lost the note at home, but found it a few hours later. I excitedly called, only to find she'd written down the number for the local Pizza Hut. FML
Today, I finally worked up enough courage to ask out the guy I've had a crush on for months. I texted him, and he thought I was Maddy from work, not Maddie his neighbor. Now he and the Maddy from his work are dating. FML
Today, I flirted with the cashier at the local bagel joint. I complimented her unique blue hair and got her number. Later on that evening, she served my girlfriend and me our food at a different restaurant. FML
Today, I finally got up the nerve to ask a girl at my school for her number. As I was typing it into my phone, she pointed out the giant booger firmly attached to my sleeve. FML
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Top comments
Scotth901 22
"Babe, I am the older brother. Want me to prove it back at my place?"
LPac5295 27
What's the difference in age OP? Or do you have a baby face?
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Comments (43)
Jets4Life89 4
You tried man, it is hard to talk to women especially when you wait and let it developed into a crush, nice try keep on swinging for the fences.
CoolCookie210 22
I feel like the age difference is important here
Zebediabolical 45
Did she give you any signs, or was this a shot in the dark? To me, this is the difference between YDI and FML on this one.
AviShtap 20
Judging by how she phrased that, this girl seems pretty rude overall. Good thing you found that out early! :)
shoower_fml 9
I noticed all my FMLs get rejected, why is that?
PhoenixChick 26
Say yes. Set her up with "your brother." Show up with a fake mustache.
CaptMacLeod 45
OP here. This was many years ago, when I was fifteen, and the girl was 18-22. Gorgeous. Needless to say I moved on. Wish I had thought of giving her my "brother's" phone # and made a date. This is one of those situations many of us face when the difference of a few years is an uncrossable ravine.
Lilo4life 26
That's a big age gap, and in many states she could get in a lot of trouble so I probably would have responded like her or "oh that's so sweet, but I can't go out with customers" or something like that, idk
CaptMacLeod 45
I'm not holding it against her; it was just one of those "crushing" moments from teenhood.
Bragi 12
Ouch!
yellowzinnias 20
To be honest, I've had to do this several times. I'm 32, look 18 and live in a college town. I've had 18-22-year-olds hit on me when I'm out with my friends and I've had to say, "Oh, that's sweet, but I'm in my thirties...is your dad single?" and laugh. Usually it goes over well; one got huffy and puffy and demanded I.D.
CaptMacLeod 45
First, congratulations on looking as young as you do. Chuckling at the one demanding ID (that conversation usually runs in the other direction)! Though honestly, your age wouldn't have daunted me much by the time I was 20; I didn't remain shy for too long.