Today, after months of using the empty driveway across the street from my house, a note was placed under my windshield wiper. It read, "Please stop parking in my driveway. P.S. You’re hot. Are you single?" FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I came home to find a car parked in my assigned space. Pissed off, I left a note on the car's windshield saying, "Hey Assface, thanks for parking in my spot. I spat on your door handle." It turns out it was my girlfriend's parent's car. They took us out to dinner. FML
Today, I went to my car to discover a note on the windshield from the city telling me that they had hit my car. On top of that note was a parking ticket, also from the city. FML
Today, in my tidy, small-town neighborhood, I parked my car 50 metres further back from my usual spot just across from our house on a half-empty public street, because it was taken. Apparently, someone didn't appreciate this. So much so, they put a used condom under my windshield wiper. FML
Today, for about the fifth time, my neighbors parked blocking my driveway. After parking across the street I stuck a note on their windshield reading “Nice park job asshole“, only to find out that their nephew just passed away and everyone was gathering to go to the viewing. FML
Today, I hit a parked car which was sticking out in the road and practically unavoidable. I left a note on the windshield saying, "You deserved to get hit - you park like an asshole." Later I realized that the paper I tore to write on was the back of my bank statement, name and address included. FML
Today, I was parking my car outside of my apartment, but the big truck next to the spot went over the line. I squeezed in anyway. Later, I discovered the truck had left and someone keyed my car. They left a note saying, "Good parking job, asshole." FML
Today, I had a very sweet and romantic love note brutally scratched into the door of my brand new car. It was addressed to Cindy. Cindy lives next door. FML
Today, someone left a note on my car, saying "You're gorgeous. Call me. #######." I called the number and they said they saw me in the store I was in, telling me "You were the ONLY attractive person in there." We decided to meet up. He walks over, I say hi, he says "I think I put my number on the wrong car." FML
Today, the driver's side window of my car was busted, and inside was a note that said, "Sorry, thought this was my car." FML
Today, after work, I peeled a parking ticket off my windshield. It was so hot that the ink from the ticket made a stamp on my windshield. Now I have a permanent reminder staring me in the face wherever I drive. FML
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Top comments
AkshaySauce 5
At least you're hot
gingerrrr88 11
Take it as a compliment?
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Comments (105)
PasstheWhiskey 3
Trade a date for two weeks of parking
awagh666 14
You let him park his, he let's you park yours. Deal of the month.
snator 0
Or charm her so you can get it back...
whippymcdumb4zs 0
76- you got the genders reversed there... She parks in his driveway and he wants to park in hers.
ifoundalaska 11
They could both be women
whippymcdumb4zs 0
^Good point.... If that's the case OP needs to grab her video camera and make a movie. Lol
daisyismydog 3
You don't have your own driveway?
awagh666 14
No she has her own parkinG-spot.
HerrBawl 4
I see what you did there
hecallsmedarlin 7
^no shit? ...lol
pinkpixie06 11
At least he was nice about asking you not to use his driveway! Some people are so possesive of a little parking spot...
mhopper 13
It's a driveway. It's your only guaranteed parking lol
ecks51 3
It's not a "parking spot." It's a driveway, private property. The person was a lot nicer than I would've been.
LowLives 9
Most people would have called the cops or had her car towed away after the first day
kandi_kid69 15
Go mingle. ;D
aj_alex 0
It's a trap lol that's funny whoever said that. Screw that not fyl Ur hot what's bad about that?
failureusername 12
You should be glad OP, you got complimented and your car didn't get towed away! :D
MerrikBarbarian 9
This can either end very well or very badly... Only time will tell
YeaSo3 14
Umm why is this an fml.. Park somewhere else & get you a date....ONLY.if your single though!
OHai15 12
Lmao, am I the only one imagining Stifler from American Pie saying something like that??
GhettoMuzick 0
Heheh but doesn't everyone love a creeper? ;D