Today, I picked up a hitchhiker. He was well dressed, and seemed trustworthy. As soon as he got in, he pulled out a gun and stole my wallet and car. All of this occurred in front of a sign warning against picking up hitchhikers. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, a total stranger asked me to marry him while we were waiting for the bus. I turned him down. He then pulled a knife on me, grabbed my purse and ran. FML
Today, a stranger pulled me out of the path of a speeding taxicab. He then took one look at my face, said, "I should've left you there", and walked away. FML
Today, I was riding on my bike when I saw a homeless guy holding a sign saying, "Need money, stranded from Oklahoma." I decided to be nice, and hopped off my bike to give him $2. He took the money, and then jacked my bike. FML
Today, I was carjacked. As he shoved me away from my car, I got hit by another car. He and the other car both drove off. FML
Today, I felt a tug on my backpack and found my wallet missing. A nice stranger pointed to a guy running down the stairs and said "There goes the guy who took your wallet!" I ran to catch the supposed offender. The 'nice' stranger was the actual offender distracting me as he got away. FML
Today, a man tried to mug me. I actually apologized to him for not having my wallet on me. FML
Today, I was on my bike. As I'm rolling through an intersection, some asshat in a pickup runs the red light and hits me. Instead of getting out and helping me, the guy hops out, takes a look at me lying in the street, steals my hat and drives off. That was my favorite hat. FML
Today, I after getting off the bus, I realized that the man I was talking to was distracting me so his "buddy" could steal my wallet. FML
Today, I stopped by the gun store to pick up a new concealed weapon for protection. As I was leaving the store, a man came up behind me, hit me with a crowbar, and stole my gun. FML
Today, I was on a bus and a man was feeling up my butt. I was just about to step on his foot when the bus stopped and he slipped out. Only then did I realize he'd stolen my wallet. FML
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Top comments
crazyj12006 3
Kinda deserve that bro.
_streets_ 19
Whenever I drive by a hitchhiker, not helping them makes me feel guilty. But at the same time, you never know who they are or what they could do.
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Comments (239)
kittylovesskyrim 0
Karma, much?
CrazyToast00 3
I have a hard time believing this one, its just too perfect.
ohSNAPyall 27
Caveat emptor!
ohSNAPyall 27
This hitchhiker had major chutzpah to carjack you in front of that sign.
acidburnz1107 10
IM thinking y'all need to see the hitchhikers guide to the galax Y
xuoiz 1
It's the well dressed hitchhikers you worry about. Pick up the hippie/hobo/other smelly ones.
HunterAlpha1 8
i bet OP is one of those people who leaves their car running and smokes and talks on the phone while pumping gas.
Jenchixo 1
You ******* deserve it didn't they teach you in driving school or drivers Ed to not pick up hitchhiker it's not allow! You never know what they will do!
greatfirstdate 18
The Rugburns: Don't pick up hitchhiker joe. He'll slit your throat and cut off your big toe.
JFK4ME 0
Pretty lucky he didn't pistol whip u or butt rape you either . Picking up a hitch hiker is only done in movies not real life . Unless its in the back of the truck where Mexicans belong .