Today, to spice things up a bit, my wife and I were having sex in our kitchen. She was up on the counter and I moved her over to get in a better position. The stove was still hot from dinner, so now my wife has a burn that looks like a double rainbow on her ass. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to kiss my girlfriend on the neck while she was cooking on the stove. Apparently I scared her and now I have a nice burn mark on my head from the hot frying pan she hit me with. FML
Today, my boyfriend came home while I was making a snack in the kitchen. We started making out and he lifted me up and sat my ass on the hot stove. FML
Today, my wife left her curling iron on the bed, which was dangerous enough, but I also accidentally sat on it after my shower. Now I have a burn on the bottom of my balls, which has turned into a painful blister. FML
Today, while I was in the midst of the most mind-blowing shower sex ever, the fire alarm went off. My girlfriend had left the stove top on and the entire kitchen had caught on fire. So instead of finishing, I frantically ran around naked trying to douse the flames. FML
Today, I thought it would be sexy to cook dinner in lingerie. Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to scare me while I was cooking. I jumped and burned my boobs with boiling cooking oil. FML
Today, I burned my butt on the heater when I tried to warm up after my shower. FML
Today, my girlfriend threw boiling water at me to get me off my phone. It worked, but now I'm burned. FML
Today, my partner took a shower while in the middle of cooking something. My eyes are still burning from the smoke. FML
Today, my wife woke me up by giving my erect penis a Chinese burn. FML
Today, things started to heat up in the bedroom. Not in a sexual way, though; the lamp caught fire. FML
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Top comments
Lozza 0
Was the heat... SO INTENSE?
jaderrrx3 0
I think it's more like **** her life.
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Comments (213)
imright24 0
You both fail at sex.
Illyssa_fml 4
Old ppl shouldn't have kitchen sex haha
stewpididiot 11
a double rainbow across a full moon. it's a sign !!!
Faizaru 0
Doulbe rainbow all the way across...her ass? YEAAAYEAAHAAA, not intense. Kinda gross acctually.
mc1900 4
a full rainbow? oh my god. so intense!
A_black_dude 0
a double rainbow what does it mean
elmorous 0
if you're gonna make sh!t up, then why not make sh!t up. You might want to find something that nobody has ever heard before.
doglady 16
F her life, dude! not yours
Bojangis 0
sorry I don't know what's wrong with that's pretty cool
Hozay 0
kinky