Today, I was half asleep and tried to cuddle my husband as we slept. Still dreaming, he yelled for me to leave his money alone. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after struggling for hours to fall asleep with my husband's rather rattling snoring, I finally managed to drop off… only to be rudely awakened an hour later by my husband elbowing me in the face in his sleep. FML
Today, my husband fell asleep while cuddling. I didn't want to wake him, so I lay there for ages, trying to fall asleep. Just as I finally dozed off, my leg uncontrollably jerked and hit him in the nuts. He's convinced I did it deliberately as revenge for an argument we had 5 days ago. FML
Today, I discovered that I sometimes talk in my sleep. After spending an amazing, perfectly romantic night with my boyfriend, I woke up to him telling me to leave. I have no idea what I could have said. He still won't talk to me. FML
Today, in the middle of the night, my fiancé started yelling gibberish in his sleep. When I tried to wake him, he punched me square in the face. FML
Today, I was in one of those lucid half sleeps with my boyfriend. Not fully awake to control myself, I ripped ass. I had no idea what to do. I pretended to still be sleeping. I'm pretty sure he noticed because he patted me on the back in a congratulatory sort of way. FML
Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML
Today, I woke up at 3 a.m. because my wife was snoring loudly enough to wake me up. I went off to the guest room to try to get back to sleep. Eventually I fell back asleep. Then I had a dream that my wife was snoring loudly enough to wake me up. It woke me up. FML
Today, I yelled out while I was asleep. However, I was sleeping during a very important meeting with customers and my boss. FML
Today, I dreamt that the fabric and pattern I was working on were sliding off the table so I quickly reached to grab it, effectively driving my fingers into my husband's eyes. Fuck his life too. FML
Today, while in bed, I tried to explain how overworked and unappreciated I feel doing all the housework to my fiancé. It was only when I'd finished my long rant that I realized he had been asleep almost the whole time. FML
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Top comments
whitedw 0
lol......well at least he didnt yell some other girl's name but still fyl
indoorsy 3
Now I anin't saying she's a gold digger...
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Comments (119)
KrayKrayGurl117 7
Wow. A little too over protective of our money now are we?
dragonstrike94 8
There is no such thing as over protective of your money
Jasonf6 0
Nailed it!!
studdmuffin1990 7
This really isn't an FML situation. Apparently we have morons moderating the FML's lately. That's seriously no big deal what so ever unless your a gold digger
cruellah 5
You can always get a job so he has less reason to worry.
JurassicHole 5
5 - Wouldn't need to ask that question if you actually read the FML. Smh.
tdawg4200 0
He was sleeping. Why does this make your life shitty?
Adelaide_CF 6
This is pretty funny :D
melibear89 7
How is this an FML? He was talking in his sleep. Unless you take his money and spend it all. If you really think this makes your life shitty there's something wrong in your life.
ka1729 14
maybe its a sign
iancomings 3
lol ad is for cash first!
XtraEzeee 8
I've seen double comment, even triple comment. But dectupple comment?! What madness is this!
XtraEzeee 8
I've seen double comment, even triple comment. But ninetuple comment?! What madness is this!
XtraEzeee 8
I've seen double comment, even triple comment. But ninetuple comment?! What madness is this!
tj4234 36
both of you, shut the **** up...