Today, after months of dating, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted to take things to the next level. He told me that he couldn't have sex with me because of his religious beliefs. I would've been fine with this if it weren't for the fact that I know he and his family are all atheists. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my date walked out on me after I told him I was devout in my beliefs, including saving myself until marriage. Apparently, meeting me at Sunday services didn’t twig him to my faith, and he actually thought religious girls were all secret sluts like in the pornos. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend why he didn't believe in marriage. His response was, "I believe in marriage. Just not marriage with you." FML
Today, I had a meeting with a potential roommate to rent a 2/2 space and it was going well. We laughed, joked, and seemed to get along and want the same things. At the end of the conversation, however, he said he needed to "pray" about his decision to room with an atheist. This probably won't work out. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. Why? Because I became a vegetarian. Apparently, he doesn't believe in "not eating meat." FML
Today, my boyfriend decided he's asexual and dumped me on the spot. FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend of 5 years after finally realizing I'm a lesbian. He then outed me to my very religious and conservative family. FML
Today, after agreeing to marry my boyfriend, he started spouting crap about converting to his religion, and how I’d need to take lessons from his mother on how to be a proper wife to him at all times, like, EXCUSE ME, WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU’RE TALKING TO? DUMPED. See ya later, douchebag. FML
Today, my boyfriend of six months said he wanted to take our relationship one step further. I thought he was going to ask me to move in. He meant he wanted to fart in front of me. FML
Today, my boyfriend "proposed" to me. When we first started dating, he told me that he hated the concept of marriage and absolutely never wanted to go through with it. So I laughed and turned him down, obviously thinking it was just a joke. He was serious. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I went to my parents' barbecue. He knew my family is extremely religious, so what did he do? Called for silence to make an announcement, namely: "God isn't real." Cue a riot that ended in us being kicked out and me all but disowned for "putting him up to it". FML
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Top comments
PeteyPablo12308 20
Go buy a vibrator... It'll probably be more satisfying anyways.
3mi1y_ 16
at least he isnt only in the relationship FOR the sex. in a way, be grateful
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Comments (128)
wriptidez 0
well respect his answer
ninjuh_wingman 29
Thats saying something when a guy makes up an excuse not to have sex with you.
Fancyy 0
Apparently 'not everyone are in relationships for sex' ! Thumbs up to your comment ! Lol.
girl112891 7
A-sexual maybe?
t765234 10
There is no dash in the word asexual.
fuzz97 23
I think ********** is frowned upon no matter what you believe
ayenii 14
Ouch.
Acaprice14 9
What he meant was, "I can't have sex with you because it's against your religious beliefs. We are not married.."
perdix 31
Maybe God told him not to have sex with you. He'll punt on the atheism thing just to keep his precious bodily fluids from you.
zenrael 21
He cheating on you. Fyl
RuCheezBurger 10
Why do you assume OP is being cheated on?
N3766 20
Rape him.
Hizodge 4
How lame.
JulesVern16 5
What he's trying to say is... Your ugly. I'm sorry.
lajaynay 15
You're stupid but I'm not sorry.
tj4234 36
I suppose he's right on a technicality OP. Atheism may not be a religion, but it is however, a religious belief. Also, just because he is an atheist does not mean that he believes in sex before marriage. You don't have to be a Buddhist, a Christian or a Hindu to believe in abstinence or celibacy. Everyone is free to make their own choices.
DjeePee 25
No, he's technically not right. Atheism is indeed a belief, but abstinence or celibacy isn't part of that belief, so saying 'I can't have sex with you because I'm an atheist' is wrong.
VeganVampyre 27
Actually, I would say atheism is more than just an absence of belief. Atheists don't just not believe in god, they specifically believe there is no god. Agnostics are the ones that don't believe in god.
N3766 20
76 Your opinion is retarded. Agnostics are the ones that believe in god but don't believe in religion.
Zomg_Okay 27
Yeah, but we all know that Snickers bars are a figment of our imagination anyway, so... [EDIT] @90 Agnostics don't believe in God - they are waiting for something to happen that will convince them that God(s) are real.
DjeePee 25
Well yeah, but I see an absence of belief also as a form of belief. Oh, and as an agnostic atheist, I can say that you three have all a wrong definition of agnosticism. Agnostics do not know whether there is a God or not, so they will not make any 'God exists' or 'God doesn't exist' statement. There are two kinds of agnosts: the 'I don't know if there is any God, but I think chances are bigger that he doesn't exist' and the 'I don't know if there is any God, but I think chances are bigger that he does exist'. Basic knowledge of religion, you're welcome.
Zomg_Okay 27
Ah, thanks for that 96. I always thought that an agnostic was someone who was just uncertain and waiting for proof.
docscientist 10
You pretty much took the words out of my mouth, 26. Agnostic atheists take the most reasonable approach compared to all beliefs.
saksxalmo 20
Actually, I'm pretty sure (mostly because I just looked it up to check) that agnostics are people who believe a god's existence cannot be proven or disproven, as opposed to gnostics who believe that a god's existence CAN be proven or disproven. So an agnostic atheist is someone who does not believe in a god but does not think that believe can be either proven or disproven, a gnostic theist is someone who believes in God and believes that god's existence can be proven, etc. Someone correct me if I'm wrong. Maybe there are multiple definitions.