Today, after months of dating, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted to take things to the next level. He told me that he couldn't have sex with me because of his religious beliefs. I would've been fine with this if it weren't for the fact that I know he and his family are all atheists. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my date walked out on me after I told him I was devout in my beliefs, including saving myself until marriage. Apparently, meeting me at Sunday services didn’t twig him to my faith, and he actually thought religious girls were all secret sluts like in the pornos. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend why he didn't believe in marriage. His response was, "I believe in marriage. Just not marriage with you." FML
Today, I had a meeting with a potential roommate to rent a 2/2 space and it was going well. We laughed, joked, and seemed to get along and want the same things. At the end of the conversation, however, he said he needed to "pray" about his decision to room with an atheist. This probably won't work out. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. Why? Because I became a vegetarian. Apparently, he doesn't believe in "not eating meat." FML
Today, my boyfriend decided he's asexual and dumped me on the spot. FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend of 5 years after finally realizing I'm a lesbian. He then outed me to my very religious and conservative family. FML
Today, after agreeing to marry my boyfriend, he started spouting crap about converting to his religion, and how I’d need to take lessons from his mother on how to be a proper wife to him at all times, like, EXCUSE ME, WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU’RE TALKING TO? DUMPED. See ya later, douchebag. FML
Today, my boyfriend of six months said he wanted to take our relationship one step further. I thought he was going to ask me to move in. He meant he wanted to fart in front of me. FML
Today, my boyfriend "proposed" to me. When we first started dating, he told me that he hated the concept of marriage and absolutely never wanted to go through with it. So I laughed and turned him down, obviously thinking it was just a joke. He was serious. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I went to my parents' barbecue. He knew my family is extremely religious, so what did he do? Called for silence to make an announcement, namely: "God isn't real." Cue a riot that ended in us being kicked out and me all but disowned for "putting him up to it". FML
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Top comments
PeteyPablo12308 20
Go buy a vibrator... It'll probably be more satisfying anyways.
3mi1y_ 16
at least he isnt only in the relationship FOR the sex. in a way, be grateful
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Comments (128)
russfml 31
I think your boyfriend is gay
xXxMinkixXx 3
I havnt seen a full family of atheists before, it's usually just rebelling teens. But hey at least you didn't fall in love to find out it was just sex for him.
RedPillSucks 33
Tell him to convert from Atheism to Agnosticism.
cassiekinz 14
Hey now. We athiests dont believe in sex before marriage either... At least, its not encouraged.
Wtf91101 3
What is the next level? Sex? Three way w a sheep? Maybe he just doesn't want to F you.
TheNewGuy03 29
In short, it's great if he doesn't want to have sex, and it's also great if he wants to have sex. There is no "right answer." |the kid|
boredfishing 0
He is afraid of the pussy. Sadly a bunch of mean jokes come to mind when I think of this. Sorry OP.... P.s. shower regularly
hateevryone 15
you're dating an atheist?
br0ccoli 15
Are you sure he wasn't born female? Seems questionable...
cajekraze 7
maybe he meant personal morals. Some people have those without being religious. Also, he's gay and you're ugly