Injury and Intimacy: Nasty

Nasty

By Anonymous - 30/08/2011 11:24 - Australia

Today, I got my first hand job. I started bleeding. FML

agreeclassic 45 552

vote type 1 5 898

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Traumatized knob

By Anonymous - 10/03/2015 19:11

Today, I got my first handjob. I also found out today that a girl can pull your skin hard enough to cause it to bleed profusely. FML

agreeclassic 41 036

vote type 1 4 623

By southernluxe - 04/09/2011 09:36 - United States

Today, I got my first handjob. She ripped out a pube. It hurt so bad my eyes teared up. She asked what was wrong and not wanting to make her feel guilty I had to tell her it was "Just so good." FML

agreeclassic 41 982

vote type 1 10 672

By JoshuasGirl - 23/12/2013 19:13 - United States - Grand Rapids

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After he'd repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me, he passed out halfway through. FML

agreeclassic 54 126

vote type 1 6 462

Frustrated wank

By Anonymous - 05/10/2023 19:00

Today, I gave my boyfriend a handjob for the first time. Apparently, I was so bad at it that he eventually just slapped my hand away and angrily said he'd do it himself. FML

agreeclassic 620

vote type 1 330

By Rumpkis - 05/12/2011 01:30 - United States

Today, I almost got a blowjob for the first time. Except I came before I even got in her mouth. FML

agreeclassic 47 005

vote type 1 18 690

By anonymous - 02/11/2015 03:13 - United States - San Francisco

Today, was the first time giving head to my boyfriend. He couldn't finish, so I tried a handjob. In the end he kind of pushed my hand away so he could finish himself off. FML

agreeclassic 28 350

vote type 1 7 541

She's electric

By nnniii - 16/11/2015 04:55 - United States - Seattle

Today, I tried to give my first hand-job while wearing fuzzy socks in a carpeted room. I reached out to touch his dick and shocked him. FML

agreeclassic 28 516

vote type 1 5 326

Nosebleed

By bloody good time - 23/11/2019 05:00

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and he slid his hand up near my face too fast and ended up clocking me in the nose. It is the first time that I've ever had nosebleed while orgasming. FML

agreeclassic 2 216

vote type 1 258

By Anonymous - 25/10/2014 01:32 - United States - Grand Rapids

Today, I ran a hand down my freshly shaven leg to appreciate the smoothness, only to come up with a hand covered in blood. FML

agreeclassic 36 601

vote type 1 5 554

Congrats

By Anonymous - 27/01/2013 22:44 - Canada - Rosetown

Today, after making love to my boyfriend for the first time, he shook my hand and said, "Good job." FML

agreeclassic 44 845

vote type 1 8 604

AsainChick 0

Tuesday 30 August 2011 15:56

You shoul probably get that checked out...

saIty 17

Tuesday 30 August 2011 15:58

That's when you know your pleaser is giving 120%.

Comments

bugluvr 0

Wednesday 31 August 2011 4:29

Dangg that sucks lol

sagax06 1

Wednesday 31 August 2011 4:34

that....seems interesting....

sugarbaby9908 20

Wednesday 31 August 2011 4:34

That's where the phrase "spit on it" comes into play

lolvickylol 2

Wednesday 31 August 2011 4:38

dude! are you okay! go get that checked out bro

music_lover_15 0

Wednesday 31 August 2011 4:44

That is a turn off I'm so sorry

yantz 0

Wednesday 31 August 2011 4:46

Lube that shit up,

ikry33 0

Wednesday 31 August 2011 4:49

umm that's..... bad .___.

theFullmonty1394 4

Wednesday 31 August 2011 6:13

...well did you keep going? Blood makes a tasty and effective lube...

bitchslapped22 14

Wednesday 31 August 2011 6:26

lol whaaa?

portcaveman 5

Wednesday 31 August 2011 6:59

lawl

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vote type 1 354

Today, I was walking down the street hand in hand with my girlfriend. I couldn't help but stare at a gorgeous girl as she bent down to pick something up. It was such a great sight, I didn't notice the metal telephone pole directly in my path. FML

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Today, I got back from a camping trip after being homesick for 3 weeks. I couldn't remember why I had wanted to be away from my family for so long when I signed up for it. When I got home, I remembered. Everyone in my family hates each other. I want to go back to the camping site. FML

agreeclassic 1 521

vote type 1 270

Today, after my dad always telling me that if I went to college then one day I could have a big house, a nice car, a hot wife, and two great kids, the joke's on you Dad. I have a Master's degree and can't afford rent, can’t afford driving lessons, and am single. Also, I've not eaten in two days, because I can’t afford food FML

agreeclassic 471

vote type 1 119

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agreeclassic 31 053

vote type 1 2 606