True romantic - FML

True romantic

By Anonymous - 28/03/2020 08:00 - United Kingdom - London

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. During the act, he looked deep in to my eyes before whispering, "Up the arse next time?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 206

You deserved it 375

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Same thing different taste

By Lady Vulva - 19/09/2015 02:56

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 982

You deserved it 3 073

By Anonymous - 14/12/2013 18:50

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. As he came, he yelled "FIRST, BITCHES!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 935

You deserved it 9 845

Nuts

By Anonymous - 15/09/2011 20:03 - United States

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. Not only did he last just 2 minutes, he also sat there for a while afterwards, smacking his semi-erect penis in awe and saying, "Look, it's still hard! How crazy is that?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 879

You deserved it 6 151

Repetition

By Fuck - 25/02/2015 21:39 - United States - Fowler

Spicy

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. In the middle of it, he started saying in deep voice, "Enter, exit." Over and over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 773

You deserved it 4 441

By Anonymous - 01/07/2016 18:24 - United States - Mission

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity. We'd both waited until marriage, so I thought it'd be nice and romantic. Nope. He slipped it into my ass and claimed he didn't know which hole was the right one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 809

You deserved it 5 258

Lost in the sauce

By klsdhjla - 15/02/2010 01:23 - United States

Spicy

Today, while losing my virginity to my boyfriend, I had my first orgasm. I don't remember much of what I said during, but after it was all over, he looks at me and says, "You have terrible grammar during climax." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 366

You deserved it 5 630

By bugger - 22/02/2015 17:31

Spicy

Today, I looked my boyfriend in the eyes and said "I love y-" He cut me off with, "Babe, a blowjob's worth a thousand words" and held eye contact until I awkwardly excused myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 073

You deserved it 5 180

Happy Valentine's Day

By henhouse - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Australia - Brunswick East

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity. The most memorable aspect of it wasn't the fact that my boyfriend finished after two thrusts, but rather the fact that he first said, "The pilot has entered the cockpit." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 582

You deserved it 3 829

By ShouldveStayedAVirgin - 13/01/2016 18:30 - United States - Houston

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend of 7 years. He thrusted as fast as rabbits. I waited years for 10 seconds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 926

You deserved it 7 087

By Anonymous - 03/11/2012 01:23 - Canada - Bedford

Spicy

Today, I finally lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It hurt like hell, was over in less than a minute, and he tried to reuse the condom for a second round. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 047

You deserved it 6 089

Next

Top comments

jbuckets_404 38

Saturday 28 March 2020 15:08

Next time, up HIS arse?! SURE!!! Buy an extra-wide strap-on for "HIS" pleasure....

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 28 March 2020 9:38

Losing two virginities back-to-back? That's going to be a great story for the grandchildren. I can imagine you telling it every Thanksgiving. You know, when someone mentions stuffing. "Speaking of stuffing, let me tell you of the time Grandpa..." Good times!

Comments

supree14 3

Saturday 28 March 2020 8:28

He's a pig. Leave him before you get hurt.

DirtySalamander 9

Saturday 28 March 2020 10:40

he was asking, not demanding. lol

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 28 March 2020 9:38

Losing two virginities back-to-back? That's going to be a great story for the grandchildren. I can imagine you telling it every Thanksgiving. You know, when someone mentions stuffing. "Speaking of stuffing, let me tell you of the time Grandpa..." Good times!

jbuckets_404 38

Saturday 28 March 2020 15:08

Next time, up HIS arse?! SURE!!! Buy an extra-wide strap-on for "HIS" pleasure....

mskeptik 12

Saturday 28 March 2020 17:36

Why don't you gladly agree? Just say: "Sure honey, lube your arse and let me go grab my strap-on".

Vivien Lee 7

Saturday 28 March 2020 19:40

Ew....what kind of man is he?

MrGrumblebum 19

Sunday 29 March 2020 1:28

One that asks first, clearly.

Itsheragain 9

Sunday 29 March 2020 5:10

tell him, "yeah after you".

carrs2154 9

Sunday 29 March 2020 8:42

yikes!!

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The Top

Today, my wife upset herself by ringing my best friend to see if he would lie about where I was, and he did. Now my wife thinks I get my friends to lie for me to cover up my cheating. I’ve never once cheated. This feels like the next level up from cheating on her in her dreams, because she's crazy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 407

You deserved it 127

Today, I couldn't sleep because I had the worst time positioning myself around my cat who was sleeping in my bed. I couldn't kick my cat out of bed because I earlier today had an argument with my brother over which of us the cat loved more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 004

You deserved it 42 709

The Top

Today, as I was transcribing my manager's recorded orated memo, I heard an unmistakable grunt and splash of an impromptu "bathroom deposit." It seems like my manager is maximizing his time like never before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 542

You deserved it 674

Today I left my 8-week-old with my brother so I could return to work. His wife took all the breast milk I'd packed out of the fridge and poured it out. According to her, it was “gross” and she didn’t want it near her food. My son is allergic to formula. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 971

You deserved it 342

Today, my son was crying and my dad's way of helping was to go to the pub for an hour, then come back after my son had cried himself to sleep. I’d have kicked him out but he does a lot of other things around here, and I couldn’t cope without him. It doesn’t stop him being an insensitive prick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 250

You deserved it 885

Today, my ex dropped by to pick up a piece of art he'd left when I threw him out a month ago. While here, he visited the restroom. Tonight, my shampoo smelled like urine. And he called at 11pm to say he'd ''rubbed one out'' on my new boyfriend's toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 087

You deserved it 8 266

Today, I went to a blood drive. The nurse taking my blood mentioned that she'd been called in on her day off, and she swore she wasn't drunk. I didn't know what to do, so I just smiled and blinked back tears as she savaged the vein in my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 839

You deserved it 3 289

Today, I found out I'm getting laid off. However, they're keeping my coworker who rarely shows up and sleeps all the time when he's there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 112

You deserved it 2 450