Today, at work teaching a cooking class, one of the kids asked if they could use a knife to help me chop vegetables. I said no, because it was very sharp and only staff members are allowed to use them. Just as I said that, the knife sliced through the tip of my thumb. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, while working at a fine-dining restaurant, I was dicing veggies. I was paying such close attention to make sure the veggies were all the same size, that I managed to cut off the tip of my thumb. FML
Today, visiting my partner’s family for the first time, I offered to help cook, saying I could chop the vegetables. Five minutes later, I nicked my finger, dropped the knife, and instinctively said a very loud curse word in front of their very traditional grandparents. Everyone froze while someone went to get me a bandage. FML
Today, I was warning a girl in my art class to be careful with a Stanley knife, as she had managed to cut her finger quite badly. Just as I said it, I sliced my finger open with a Stanley knife. FML
Today, during a workplace safety exercise at work, I managed to cut off the tip of my thumb. FML
Today, I was telling my younger brother and sister how important it is to know how to use a knife properly, all while slicing potatoes. Just as I was saying how stupid people can be with knives, the potato slipped on the counter. I sliced open my hand while talking about knife safety. FML
Today, I'm a chef and I had a new set of knives delivered. My boss says to me, ''Be careful with your new knives, they're going to be sharp. You don't want to cut your nail off.'' Not 2 minutes later I chop my whole nail off my right index. He jinxed me. FML
Today, I was cooking dinner for my children, managing for once not to screw up and hurt myself. Then, while chopping vegetables, I accidentally sliced my finger open. The same finger that was still covered in juice from a lemon I'd just squeezed. FML
Today, I learned how to sharpen a knife. I sharpened it so well that it went through my finger like a lightsaber. FML
Today, while demonstrating our new meat slicer at work, and after sharpening the blade at the end of the demonstration, I noticed some metal powder. I grabbed a rag to wipe it off, not realizing the blade was still in the “open” position. I now have six stitches and a really painful finger. FML
Today, I was helping tidy up after my girlfriend's flat warming. I went to put a sharp kitchen knife in the sink while she was washing dishes, and stabbed her in the finger instead. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 39
And now you get to teach them first aid! You're such a good teacher.
MassiveBerry 9
Well, you were right. It was sharp.
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Comments (112)
amyyyf 6
How did you txt your story with a messed up thumb?? lol
tj4234 35
not everyone texts their stories you know? Also FMLs aren't published the same day they are typed up. It stands to reason to assume that not all FMLs are submitted on the same day the event happened either. So her thumb has probably healed by now.
gsevison 6
Those kids probably won't take you seriously for a while
mxgirl1998 26
Does he still want it
rawlings123 17
Wait so did she cut her own finger or was it a student?
murythawn 13
FangirlingAlways has gone through more shitty comments than Tiger Woods did Denny's waitresses.
worthlessACfan 11
well you proved that the knife is dangerous
jtea 10
At least they can't say you're making it up.
The_Khan 12
Frankly, while it sucks for you, this is clearly showing them knives can be dangerous if you dont Watch out. Logically (logic on the internet, lol) this was a learning moment. Though I do question a cooking class where the students cant use knives.
nrwl_30 17
Very Monty Pythonesque... See? As blood drips from your thumb....maybe that'll teach you young whippersnappers to listen!!
The_Hula_Monster 10
Cringe.wav