Today, my mom bitched me out and threatened to send me to a Bible camp, after catching me admiring a photo of a bikini model, which is apparently "immoral behavior." This is the same woman who cheated on my dad twice, justifying it by claiming the Devil tempted her. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom walked into the bathroom while I was taking a pic to send to my long-distance boyfriend. She then told me I would go to hell for flaunting myself at guys. I was fully clothed, sending a pic to see if he liked my new haircut. That and I'm 21. FML
Today, I told my mom I've been taking yoga lessons, and that it'd be cool if she took some with me. She immediately went on a rant, calling yoga "satanic" and accusing me of trying to get her into "devil worship". Well, that's the last time I try to patch our relationship up. FML
Today, my mom called me a slut after she found out I sleep naked. This is how desperate she is for any excuse to yell at me. FML
Today, my mom tried to convince my dad that I was a lesbian. Why? Because she was bored. FML
Today, my mom had a tantrum and screamed at me over my use of bronzer. She called me a selfish bitch and claimed that I'm somehow slowly giving myself skin cancer. FML
Today, my mother threatened me if I keep wearing yoga pants to school, she's going to have my dad pick me up in a speedo. FML
Today, on Facebook, my sister posted a ton of photos of herself wearing a skimpy bikini, commenting that she looked hideous and fat. I can't stand attention-seeking fuckballs, so I called her on it. My mother then condemned me for "mocking" my sister, and grounded me for an entire month. FML
Today, my normally very modest and prissy mom came home, pissed off about something. I asked her what was wrong, but she wouldn't say, and snapped at me to "fuck off." She then grounded me for "making" her use that kind of "vile language." FML
Today, my mother is mad at me because I dared, yes DARED, to go out with a girl who stands up to her instead of just meekly doing what she tells her. Which should tell you exactly what sort of woman my mother is, so you know this FML is just the tip of my lifelong misery iceberg. FML
Today, my mother bitched me out for filing divorce papers against my abusive husband. According to her, it's a "slap in God's face". She's the one who's divorced two husbands so far because they weren't getting job promotions fast enough to support her hoarding habit. FML
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Top comments
williamcarter93 13
Hypocrites at their finest. Anything is okay for them to do with their religion as their excuse but as soon as someone else does it they're immoral, hellbound people.
DocBastard 40
I hear there are lots of naughty, naughty girls at bible camp.
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Comments (228)
The_Brain_fml 3
Hahahahhahaha
jewwybeanzzz 10
But... bible camp is fun! :P my friend almost killed us with bug spray because we was afraid of spiders, I had a conversation with a friend and she said if she's 80 and dieing in a hospital I am allowed to push her over Niagara falls and then put her body on a boat with all of her possessions and light it on fire (like a Viking). Also we played real life fruit ninja. Machetes and watermelon? heck yes! I'm sorry your mom is hypocritical. Please know not every religious person is like that
vmiller97 3
It is always sad when people use religion that way, ruining it for other people. I am personally a Christian and I know that Jesus didn't stand for condemnation but forgiveness and salvation. Sorry about your mom, I hope it all works out for you.
starmagick 3
you should've made her cheating your comeback to her for yelling at you
sp00ky_fml 5
So says yet another mindless peon with no understanding or comprehension of the concept of respect for ones parents and family. I feel sorry for you.
THE_A_TEEN 28
Said the person who probably ignored the how the mother showed no understanding or comprehension of the concept of respect for ones husband (*Cough *Cough *cheating *Cough) or son (being a hypocrite).
chantelhelmersen 6
I know what you mean.
fucking_dev 2
oh my gosh .. I would have told that bitch to **** off .. & when I got sent to camp I'd go around saying I love the devil & talking shit to them to until I got kicked out & sent back home ... wow , **** that bitch aka your mom
SillyGirl4602 23
Threatening to send you to bible camp for looking at a photo is silly. Saying that the devil tempted her to have an affair? That is just asinine.
FlyingPie 17
Religious fanatics can be a hypocritical bunch at times, justifying their behavior on being "tempted by the devil" and claiming to be "born again" so they can wipe their slate clean.
FMLoverAgain 7
You are truly the son of a hypocritical *****
SgtCervantesusmc 0
I BET YOUR MOM ALSO ATTENDS THAT WESTBORO BAPTIST CHURCH HUH? YOU SHOULD THROAT PUNCH YOUR MOM.