Today, the doorbell rang. I saw my incredibly overbearing mum's car outside, so I stayed quiet and tried to sneak upstairs. As I crawled through the hallway, commando style, I realised the door blinds were still out for cleaning. If scowls could kill, I'd be roasting in Hell right now. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, someone knocked at my door. I saw it was my Mom, so I flattened myself against the door and tried to be as quiet as possible. I pulled my phone out and almost had silenced it before she called and heard the ringtone through the door. I had to invite her in and hear the usual "get married and have kids." FML
Today, I was so exhausted that I slept through my phone ringing, and later my doorbell ringing. My psycho mom freaked out, and thinking I was in trouble, broke a window to get inside. This all happened before 7 a.m. FML
Today, my relationship with my family is so bad that when someone burst into my house without ringing the doorbell, my first assumption was, "Oh God I hope it's not my mum visiting!" rather than, "Oh God, it's a burglar!" It was actually my mother-in-law, and I was truly relieved. FML
Today, my mom realized that the "door" part in "screen door" doesn't block sound when she began to talk to our neighbours about how much of a failure I am. I heard everything. FML
Today, I was singing in the shower, not realising the window was open. When I got out, the neighbours were at the front door, loudly arguing with my mother. They were complaining about my awful singing. FML
Today, I was daydreaming in bed when my phone rang from across the room. I scrambled out of my covers, tripped over a pair of boots I had by the bed, and slipped on some jeans laying on the floor. Luckily, I answered my phone in time, but only to have my mom tell me to clean my room before she got home. FML
Today, my mom and I heard a thump from inside the coat closet. I opened the door, and something fell on me. My mom, who was behind me, screamed, closed the laundry room door, and ran into the garage, leaving me to face the alleged attacker. It was the vacuum. FML
Today, I was trying to sneak home from a party. Instead, I head-butted a glass door and woke my mother up. FML
Today, I tried sneaking over to my girlfriend's house to be romantic and knocked on her window. She went and got her mother to see who was at the window. FML
Today, I tried fixing the squeak in my bedroom door. Instead, I made it dramatically louder. That night, when I sneaked to the kitchen for a snack, the door shrieked like a horror movie prop. My family thought someone broke in. It was just me craving chips. FML
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Top comments
SWC_Penguin 17
Going "commando" has two different meanings. I'm hoping to god that you meant both meanings simultaneously because that makes the story even better.
HKCgrimmjow 15
However you have to agree picturing this scenario is really quite amusing
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Comments (85)
AmyPond17 33
Even if she's overbearing, she's still your mother. Is it really that bad that you can't spend a little time with her?
olpally 33
Oops!!! Lol. I want to hear the follow up to this story.. What happened next after the scowls that burned you into hell? Haha.
meowmeee 7
Usually when mothers are overbearing they are sort of a bitch.
meowmeee 7
Was mean't to be a comment in response to 5.
kurodansei 16
Now that you look guilty she'll be coming over more often to make sure you aren't up to no good. so FYL OP
JACKxRAWR 22
OP should make a Vietcong-style tunnel system throughout their house to make sure this doesn't happen again.
Omniprism 15
That's funny as hell. Don't worry about it. At least you live on your own. Oh and I have a mother just like that. Her and I didn't talk for two years because she was so controlling.
worldclassrager 41
I am confused why you had to sneak around...I guess I am missing something...
pufffreak 13
Yea really I don't even have a mother
JessicaZado 11
Sorry but you deserve it OP! Your mother is just being protective and caring. One day you won't have her so appreciate her now
misstalented 6
Your mom's car is incredibly overbearing? Sounds like you have bigger problems and that your mom should take her car to a mechanic.
awnedr 8
I would rather have an overbearing mom than had one who didn't give a shit about me.