Hello, is me you're looking for?

By Anonymous - 31/08/2013 07:24 - United Kingdom - Woodford Green

Today, I moved into my new place. It evidently used to belong to a hooker, because although I've only lived here for 9 hours, so far several different men have knocked on my door and asked if "Stephanie" is available for a good time. FML
I agree, your life sucks 50 080
You deserved it 3 146

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I really really want to know your gender now.

I believe a no soliciting sign is in order


I really really want to know your gender now.

I'm not sure either is funnier though. If OP is a woman, she should just scream "STEPHANIE DIED OF NEUROSYPHILIS!" before slamming the door. If OP is a man...same thing.

It's a guy

32 how do you know?

If OP is a girl she can take Stephanie's place

33-Anonymous is a very masculine name, don't you think?

OP should dress up like Stephanie and then when the next person comes, invite them in. If OP is a guy he should remove his pants last surprising the customer with his, erm, package. If OP is a woman, then she should get a restraining order.

Maybe they don't care about OP's gender if they're really horny. In fact, we don't know whether Stephanie was a woman or a crossdresser.

And possibly get some tests done....

I think if OP is a man, he should say something along the lines of "Stephanie's gone forever, it's Stephen now"

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No, well not at Op's location.

Yea you just have to go to the warehouse a couple of blocks away now............ Uhh i mean i dont know. :O

Well.. is she?

I believe a no soliciting sign is in order

Really hope OP doesn't use a UV light in her bedroom ._.

\ 28

I'm pretty sure most hookers won't let you finish on them...

#54 they're hookers. they aren't really in the good decision making business

any one who works is a prostitute as we all have to something at one point or another that we don't want to do for money.

But then OP will miss out on Girl Scout cookies!

For some reason I see you becoming the new "Stephanie"

It will be like the Santa Clause, but with hookers.

If you need some extra cash just be Stephanie for few nights ;)

11-You mean there will be a lot of Ho-Ho-Hoes?

Clients are already lining up to her door

What if the OP's a male?

Then he can become Stephen

Take their money and call the police, op. they'll stop coming by.

Taking their money would be prostitution, so you are suggesting that OP call the police to report him/herself.

#6, if OP just took the money without offering service I feel as though her "clients" would definitely have something to come back for.. Could be a dangerous situation for OP

No it wouldn't be prostitution, as that requires an exchange of sex for money. It could, however constitute fraud or theft, depending on the local ordinances.

If you give someone a hug for money that's basically prostitution, you're selling yourself. Here she would be selling her lies XD

So somehow strippers don't go to jail? They sell their body, boobs, or sometimes more than that if you pay enough...by you logic shouldn't they al go to jail?

It's a joke. And strippers usually have the look don't touch policy. Some clubs don't even let them take their bottoms off. Unless they're the really trashy clubs there's very little contact with the customers.

threer 30

Strippers can be male, too. Dickwads..

Well, if you're ever behind on rent...

Definitely has a well-established customer base. Could get into a related business like a massage parlor or selling adult toys.

A massage business should not be related to this in any way. Any professional massage therapist will not give a happy ending.

Sounds like Stephanie was living quite comfortably.

Living the high life entertaining drop in clients. Uh, no.

I thought hookers came to the clients' house...

Stephanie doesn't do house calls

That would be a call girl

Hehehe... never mind

It can go either way. Hooker to clients house or client to hookers house.

Hey if you are ever low on cash you could just sit in your apartment and wait... Or you could take this business opportunity and run with it, make cards and hand them out to expand the clientele.