Today, I lost my virginity. The most memorable aspect of it wasn't the fact that my boyfriend finished after two thrusts, but rather the fact that he first said, "The pilot has entered the cockpit." FML
Collection
College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. As he came, he yelled "FIRST, BITCHES!" FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. Not only did he last just 2 minutes, he also sat there for a while afterwards, smacking his semi-erect penis in awe and saying, "Look, it's still hard! How crazy is that?!" FML
Today, I finally lost my virginity. In my boyfriend's racecar bed. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend of 7 years. He thrusted as fast as rabbits. I waited years for 10 seconds. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. During the act, he looked deep in to my eyes before whispering, "Up the arse next time?" FML
Today, I lost my virginity. In the middle of it, he just gave up and said he wasn't in the mood anymore. Then I had to listen about his past failed relationships for over an hour. FML
Today, I lost my virginity. It took all of 30 seconds. FML
Today, I finally lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It hurt like hell, was over in less than a minute, and he tried to reuse the condom for a second round. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered, "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
MikaykayUnicorn 36
"Prepare for take off."
pizzafrommars 14
Lemme tell a similar story. Happened about an hour ago. I attempted to lose my virginity to the most beautiful girl on earth. Couldn't get it up.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (115)
gymnast71 9
hahaha cockpit... ****...pit... I'm. done.
itskvn 19
That was funny also it could set off the heat in you.
thorpe90 8
So... You ever been to a Turkish prison
JoJoKittyCat 6
COCKpit
rylite 2
2?!
dia_love 4
pray that u r of age and know that sex is a serious thing. if u r a kid u need to stay that way for a long time. stay safe
cosmicdancer84 7
is he stupid for saying that or are you stupid for losing your virginity to this guy? think about that.
lordofwinterfell 9
brings literal meaning to "2 pump chump"
jlujan00_fml 9
That's not that bad dude, nothing wrong with humor had sexy times mixing occasionally
Chip_N_Dale88 6
PULL OUT! PULL OUT! PULL OUT!