Today, a customer handed me the ankle-length hosiery she had just used to try on some shoes, and as I sat there feeling the warm dampness of them in the palm of my hand, she said, "You should throw those away, I have a toe fungus." FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was at work and a very obese woman came in to get a pedicure. When she took her shoes off I noticed an odd black substance on her feet. I started scrubbing it off and wondered out loud, "What IS this stuff??" As a chunk of it fell onto my lip, she replied, "Girl, that's just the fungus." FML
Today, I told a customer her total was $89.40. She put her leg up on the counter and dug a $100 bill out of her nasty sock. It was damp. FML
Today, a customer tried to return some pricey lingerie. She said she didn't have the packaging, but had never worn them. The skidmark I accidentally touched begged to differ. FML
Today, whilst on the toilet at the mall, I took my new designer sandals off as my feet were blistered. Not even a second later, a hand reached out from under the stall, grabbed my sandals and disappeared. I had to walk home a mile barefoot. In the burning heat. FML
Today, we went for a foot massage. My wife found it incredibly relaxing; I just found it weird that a complete stranger seemed to be trying to give each of my toes its own handjob. Plus they used so much moisturiser that it made the inside of my shoes feel like squishy mud all day. FML
Today, I found out my dad has been using the flip-flops I wear in the shower. The reason I wear them is to prevent myself from getting his nasty foot fungus. FML
Today, I visited my gynecologist. As she had her fingers inside me she decided that was the perfect time to say, "I absolutely love your socks!" FML
Today, I was in a public restroom when someone took the toilet next to mine. Moments later, a used tampon rolls into my cubicle followed by an "Oops!" A creeping hand then promptly reached under to retrieve it. Both her hand and the tampon touched my bare toes. FML
Today, I had to give a massage to an obese person with rank smelling fungus growing in between their skin folds. They tipped me two dollars. My hands still smell. FML
Today, I found a horde of ants in one of my socks when I put it on my foot. FML
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Top comments
Godfreyy 2
That's TOE-tally uncalled for
Wreckless_fml 6
The hell?!
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Comments (73)
Wreckless_fml 6
The hell?!
kaytyS2 4
OP, the way you worded it made it seem you were willingly touching the sock.
yoursucklives 36
i would've washed my hand with boiling water if that'd happend to me. fyl..
Brandi_Faith 33
At least she told you! Can you imagine if she didn't and other people were trying them on later! :O---() (that's my face barfing and making a puddle of barf on the ground) no?...well I tried
smirnoff1695 0
Ewwy I was just reading this in a room full of people and I made a really disgusted face and made a gagging noise and everyone looked at me really weird. Haha
shannonreneee 11
That's so rude of the customer to know they have a toe fungus, not treat it and continue to place their toe in places where people could contract it. Get some fungicide on those hands, OP!
punkin_26 16
No. I could totally picture that 28. Gonna use it in the future if you dont mind.
Godfreyy 2
That's TOE-tally uncalled for
hailphire130 0
She sounds like a fungi. I mean girl. I mean... Shit.
_Vamp_ 9
I can't believe she TOE-d you that! I hope she gave you a TOE-ken of her appreciation. .......Damn, my puns are shitty lol
osiris39p 3
gingers have no souls!!!!
BloodMonger13 9
#46 agreed...
gotaphd 6
#46 TOE-tally
Grimmerie 31
you could try making some better puns, but it may be FOOT-ile. ah, SOCK it to me, you might be a SHOE-in. if you really NAIL it maybe one day you'll make it big time and be the SOLE foot-related punner.
minisquid 9
*mindblown*
CadillacPimpen 6
Wash your hands and move on waste of a post
orangeduck 6
Your comment is a waste of space. Yeah, I went that far.
CryMoreFMLs 14
His life is a waste of oxygen... Yeah, I went even further.
icefshng8 9
His life is a waste of time and space. Yeah, I went the furthest
Justforlolz 14
Your comment wasn't very nice... Yea, I'm not sure if I even left the starting line.
yeezheng 6
U should sanitized your hand right away.
sydneylol 7
She should probably go bathe in it.
jeinnor 0
Cut your hand off and give it to her by raming it down her throat
Doortje 29
Now you'll get hand fungus. FYL.
dannyboy66 7
Um thats just wonderful now isn't it lol
dannyboy66 7
Um thats just wonderful now isn't it lol
dannyboy66 7
Stupid ipod glitched up
Ctwebsyter 0
The **** she say!? Wash your hands dude...
MadManWithABox 14
WTF ma'am!? Why didn't she dispose of her own infected garment herself? Stupid, lazy, and inconsiderate she was. Wash, sanitize, disinfect your hand OP; hope nothing happens to you.
MadManWithABox 14
('Addendum':) Can you..."take action" against her? I hope you can. Just reading your FML actually made me feel queasy; I hate stuff like that happening.
jayejayejaye122 3
Why didn't she tell u earlier..? Crazy lady