Today, my girlfriend discovered subliminal messaging. She thought that whispering, "You want to shave your beard" under her breath while I'm not looking at her, then denying ever saying it, would eventually make me shave my alleged upper-lip hair FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I waxed my upper lip hair. My boyfriend later told me that he missed my mustache rubbing onto his. FML
Today, I realized that my boyfriend really does have a problem with my upper-lip hair. I woke up this morning to him ripping a wax strip off of my face. All he could say after I stopped shrieking was that he had hoped it wouldn't wake me up. FML
Today, me and my boyfriend were telling each other secrets, so I told him I shaved my upper lip. He said, "I know, it's prickly when we make out." FML
Today, my girlfriend came over to me, like she was going to kiss me, and instead rubbed her chin all over my face, exclaiming, "Can you feel my beard coming in?" Yes, yes I could. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were snuggling and telling eachother nice things. The nicest thing he could think of to say to me was "Well, I see you shaved your mustache." FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he was growing a mustache, as he had whiskers. He looked at me and said "No, but apparently you are." FML
Today, I went to the hair salon to cut 6 inches off my hair. When I got there, I decided to get my upper lip waxed for the first time. When my boyfriend came to pick me up for our date, I asked if he noticed anything different about me, the first thing he said was, "I see you got rid of your mustache." FML
Today, my girlfriend slapped a waxing strip on my beard because she is sick of quarantine and wanted to lash out at someone. FML
Today, my boyfriend started affectionately calling me "Burt Reynolds" because I wax my upper lip. FML
Today, my boyfriend thought it appropriate to let me know that doing the "duck face" in my Facebook pictures "highlights my mustache." FML
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Top comments
zoso008 7
That would be called a mustache.she doesn't know the difference and doesn't appreciate it? Tell her to GTFO!
Pleonasm 35
I'd listen to her before she paints over your van.
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Comments (105)
ducky45 20
The gender says female
gracehi 31
Ugh. Why can't people just be straightforward. If she wants you to wax your lip hair, she should just say so. And OP, don't feel embarrassed because of your lip hair. Many, if not most, women have it. I have it myself. I use Nair to remove it. It's painless and much gentler on my skin than waxing. I'd recommend it to anyone.
wonderfulrosie 13
Just make sure your skin isn't sensitive to it. I burned the crap out of lip once, never again will I use it.
caohm 18
A true lady would appreciate facial hair. for what is it but awesomeness escaping through through the face.
NoDontKillMe 19
Even on a woman?
caohm 18
nope then it's more successful at stopping sex than a chastity belt.
Alicestraza 33
Double standards much?
ManInTheMachine 19
Did she happen to just see the movie Now You See Me? If that's the case, then make sure she doesn't try anything other crazy stuff like jumping off of a building and disintegrating into thousands of dollars.
ManInTheMachine 19
*any
deathfyre8 13
I loved that movie, it was really interesting and I learned a lot in the ways of misdirection.
olpally 32
She's a moron.
iAlissa 34
Why do you always have such hateful comments?
mFUNdo21 17
haters gonna hate
gameover18 17
change her ringtone to the ringtone that makes her **** bigger and show her how real subliminal messages really work.
perdix 29
A Greek woman with upper-lip hair? Impossible! I thought you all looked like Aphrodite!
Wizardo 33
Clearly you haven't seen Medusa, Hecate or even Scylla.
perdix 29
#27, obviously I haven't seen Medusa -- you can't type FML comments with stone fingers!
deathfyre8 13
#38 Who says?
Wizardo 33
#38, well you could see her and live. Just be weary of the eyes, like the Basilisk itself - petrifies all those who make contact it does. But still The Thing can do it, you should too >.>
DividableByZero 11
Time to lose it, McLovin. It may be for the best.
hiholls 13
Guys guilt girls into shaving their privates constantly. It's not that difficult to oblige OP, unless for some reason you truly love and treasure your facial hair.
doodlecloud 26
But guys guilting girls into shaving downstairs is NOT okay. :/
laurenasabutton 26
I think the issue is more that OP's girlfriend can't just be honest and up front about it. I would be much more willing to go with my partner's preference if they asked maturely, rather than trying supposed subliminal messaging
chris4u2nv5 19
Wait till she falls asleep and whisper "you want me to take a shit on your chest" and see if it works!!!!
Axipiter 24
Sometimes I'm absolutely perplexed as to how people come up with things like this. Maybe there's not much else going on, so there's plenty of room in there for ridiculous comments?
TheJordanBryant 11
Not everybody can be perfect, and grown up such as yourself, guy.