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By knuckleheadknock - 10/11/2016 02:11

Today, my rather large boss told me how the company needs to save money, how we are going downhill fast, even suggesting that we might go bankrupt very soon. He then went on to ask me to go get him some very expensive scotch using the company credit card to, "help him cope with the stress." FML
I agree, your life sucks 9 360
You deserved it 686

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I'm confused as to how describing your boss as "rather large" had any relevance to this FML.

What does his size have to do with the rest of the story?

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I feel as if I have seen this exact story before....

Wait I moderate stories sometimes lmao

I'm confused as to how describing your boss as "rather large" had any relevance to this FML.

Obviously because there is a direct correlation between a person's size and the quality of their scotch. I thought everyone knew.

stevenJB 25

I'm thinking since OP referenced the company card that maybe the boss uses the card to gorge himself often??

That's it #8! I can't believe I missed that obvious and direct implication. Thank you!

katachristic 19

I think the implication is that OP might be afraid to confront the boss because of their size?

Hi #14. In reply to your comment, there is no point in trying to tell him not to drink, because he will get his hands on it some other way and it will make working with him in the future even more difficult as he easily gets offended and then holds grudges.

What does his size have to do with the rest of the story?

It's probably to imply that the boss frequently treats himself to liquor, fine foods, or other luxuries that the company shouldn't be paying for. Possibly meant to be interpreted the old-fashioned way, when being fat meant you were living the good life and eating your fill... except now, the boss isn't living the good life or helping his company with irrational expenses. That's my interpretation of it, anyway.

AirBusDriver 23

Doesn't matter, had Scotch.

Make sure you get yourself some tequila and vodka. By the time he figures it out, your business will have been shuttered.

If he has a superior and isn't the absolute top of the hierarchy, I suggest taking this up with whoever above him, because that sounds like... Embezzlement? Theft? I'm not sure of the exact legal term, admittedly, but it sounds like something the company would be interested in knowing if there is more people than him in charge.

Hi GhostFox, thanks for your comment. The boss I'm talking about is the General Manager, and one of the founders. The FML part of the whole situation is that he complains about our company not having enough money and then uses company money to buy himself something he ideally shouldn't use during work hours anyway.

tounces7 27

The general managers aren't allowed to steal from the company any more than the lowest paid helpers are. Even if he's a co-owner, he's still stealing if he's using a company credit card for that.

How does his size bare any relevance to the situation?

Dammit! That was supposed to be "like". Sorry.

Taco The Dank 27

Irony at its finest right there.

if you're going to go out, go put on top

you should just buy what poison you prefer with the company card and get away before the shit hits the fan..