Dad jokes

By Anonymous - 10/10/2011 22:26 - United States

Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said, "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML
I agree, your life sucks 41 151
You deserved it 27 819

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Top comments

damnalltheasshol 0

o wow I'm sorry but that's hilarious

thrAsHeRr9081 16

Well, it IS false advertisement.

Comments

damnalltheasshol 0

o wow I'm sorry but that's hilarious

They wern't boobs, they were a LIE

Hahaha this is funny I'm glad I don't need one of those.

Again I say: lol are you 12?

hahah being a girl {flicka} would be terrible.

cudi504 4

PHONY! You're a big PHONY!!!

cudi504 4

PHONY! You're a big PHONY!!!

LiveLaughFML 10

Wonderbra? that's almost as wrost as Build-a-bra lol 8D

cudi504 4

My bad for the double post

LiveLaughFML 10

*worst :(

Small tits are good too!

Fake ol' bitties.

Im guessing you needed it

Location, location.

Sorry but your dad is hilarious! Also, why can't people be comfortable in their bodies? If you're 12, you should stick to the AA training bras, and if you're older, well just wait and see you might get accustomed to your boobs. And a guy that loves you will love you for you and not your cup size. Plus you don't want to disappoint the guys with your boob disappearing act, do you?

If my dad said that to me, I'd be laughing for days. That is hilarious. xD

aruam365 24

ditto, as a girl with 42 DD's... trust me they're not that great & a pain in the back!! if they're not natural well they're gonna look fake!

I think the boobs is kinda the same issue as men have with their penis size! And in the end neither parties girls/guys care about boobs/penis size:)

Jammy01jams 2

On the bra it should say "The boobs are a lie" Small font "we apologise for this epic portal reference"

scenebarbie123 0

91 i totally was going to say that lol

guckylynn 19

120, I was not anywhere near an AA cup when I was 12... I was already in a B cup. Some girls begin to develop early, some later and some never at all. It just happens. And 147, the "42" you're talking about is the band size of your bra, and has nothing to do with how large your breasts are.

Your dad is a legend !!!!!

174, penis size does sort of matter, as it will legitimately affect some couple's sex lives.

MAN! Your dad is the most original jokester ever. I wonder how no one else came up with this joke before him! :O

Should slap a decepticon sticker on it!

aruam365 24

I'm aware? obviously anyone who has bought a bra would know this...

Hahaha your dad is a champion! I would love to shake his hand.

250, it actually does make a difference. I was a 36dd but lost weight and went down to a band size 34, but my breasts were too big for the cups and went up to a DDD (I wish it wasn't so, they're a pain in the back-literally). So a 42 dd is actually a lot more cleavage than, say a 32 DD

Only if it's really small, which is about 0,05% of world population. Girls who love their boyfriends would never make a point of it. (Or at least, they shouldn't!) You really can't feel the difference between 12 or 16 cm, really.

lol are you 12?

punkin_26 16

Sure 174, if the guy is so small you cant fell him then yeah that could be a problem. Too big can be a bad thing too. So this is for all the average sized people out there-whether your a guy with a 6 inch penis or a girl with a B cup-KEEP IT REAL!

punkin_26 16

314-think you need to find a better bra. 250 was right. The number refers to the inches around your chest cavity is, not including your breasts. The letter refers to the size of your actual breasts. DD cleavage is the same for a 44 as it is for a 34. Take it from someone who lost enough weight for it to make a difference. The rest of me got small but the boobs stayed huge! And 2 inches isnt going to change you much. it certainy wont make you gain a cup size.

MattRoseen 12

Either way it still makes no sense.....

aprilmayjune93 0

False advertisement lol

Iv heard that1 b4

yoursucklives 36

327. i don't know about american sizes. but in europe a 75B and a 85B aren't the same cups. for example 80 A cups are the same cups as 75 B, or 85 D are the same as 80 E etc...

What gave that away?

MIAMIDJ 0

YouTube much

monnanon 13

336 is right. If you cant find your bra size and its a, lets say 36D then the other size that will fit is a 34E (might be a bit tight round the ol' back tho) Dont know why it works like that but it does.

tjv3 10

your dad is 100% correct. I HATE wonder bras

pyrenean_dreams 0

THANK YOU! It really bothers me when girls/women clearly do not understand how band sizes work. I'm a 42 as well but I fully recognize that it's because I'm a big ol' porker!

aruam365 24

gee, thanks? the band around mine I wear on the tightest setting and it's still a bit loose which is more comfortable for me. So, calling yourself or anyone a big ol' porker for being a 42 is ridiculous. admittedly I'm a bit chubby however, I see lotss of women daily who make me look tiny so it's not really an accurate statement.

THE BOOBS ARE A LIE!!

sexybaybay 0

hey don't worry 42 ain't bad they can fuck off I don't get it though cause Ian alittle chubby and Iam a 34... owell anyways(:

Why fight about it? I've heard many people say the number is the band, the letter is the cup. I was a 42 DD, and NOT chubby. After I breast fed I didn't loose any weight and went to a 36D. Then I went to lasenza and was fitted, she told me it is the size around your breasts! So the cup and band go together with how big you are. But what does it matter? If it fits it fits!

ATSViper 15

Big o' titties!

On the upside you really helped my debate with a friend about boob size complex vs penis size complex much better for me thank you. I've been saying girls have it just as hard as guys with that, and at least you men can tuck your shame away. Lack of tits the world can see. I am average and I still have a complex. On the downside as a girl I can say aesthetically penis size matters a lot. That's ok though, aesthetically boob size matters a lot too, men are obsessed with big boobs from what I hear/see.

Georgieeporgiee 9

These days having DD's isn't that unusual, when I was in year 8 at least 3 people who were 12-13 had DD's...

100th post. Yay badge.

Are you trying to get attention by saying you have huge boobs?

39 - Keep your nonsense comments to yourself. :)

jackgoldstein 5

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway
BellaBelle_fml 23

I thought we had moved past the rather annoying, 'First!' comments after having learned from past, extremely thumbed down, 'First!' commenters. Apparently I was sorely mistaken.

[email protected]&$!"!?!?!! Does I win something? ^^^ Excuse the trollz

well clearly your dad has no taste.

IndiRae 9

I don't think dads should taste their daughters.

cptmorgan6 8

Haha that's fucked.

Hmm. Needs more salt.

GuitarFail123 9

wow lol just wow

Evey15 4

Uuumm.... no

Evey15 4

Just no -__-

TheBeastiest 6

And you should just stop trying. That's just wrong, it might be right to you, but not the rest of society

Why were you wondering, dad?

Don't worry, chick. I am frickin TINY, too. I would get a wonderbra but I don't think they make size A27. :(

XxREXxX 0

id try to console you but im laughing too hard

I agree. Titties are titties.

KiddNYC1O 20

Yes. Implants are yucky.

More importantly, how the fuck did he know it was a wonderbra?

ImOlivia 5

If you live with someone I'm pretty sure you would realize if their breast got noticeably bigger over night.

Yeah, but you wouldnt know that it was because she was wearing a wonderbra

Cmon gals be proud of what is natural look at stars like Keira knightly she doesn't have really big titties but she's still pretty fine. Just beeeeee yourself

Boobies ftw

I actually prefer small boobs to big ones.

Small boobs are fun too don't hate!

Why do guys even care about breast? It looks exactly the same as their chest but more developed. Wondering what boobs look like? Take your shirt off look in a mirror and that's what boobs look like but a bit bigger.

Well we like boobs, because A- we don't have them And B- there is a direct connection between the human sexuality and breasts( psycological connection) And i don't have any preferences when it comes to breasts, just as long as they're natural and the girl with them is healthy, and by healthy i mean a girl that does sports.

132: maybe because her dad sees her everyday and can notice a difference? I know my dad would notice lol

sarahxD1234 5

95- that's not always true , the only things some guys look for a girl is boobs . Which sucks for everyone :(

xdeadxradiox 0

95 and 100, you two are such dogs! >:(

Hey the bigger they are, the better you can talk to them

Hey the bigger they are, the better you can talk to them

ChuckNorrisBeard 0

He probably paid for it...knowing most girls never use there own money. They either use boyfriends or daddy's money. Unless they have a job

252 you would be surprised by the number of guys who like ass more than boobs, why ?because it's more comfortable to grab during sex than boobs.

What an interesting father you have. Lol

241 unless u can show them your aurgument is invlid ;D

241, people like you make me sick.

hbbs93 6

Saggy ./ ./

243- that comment has no relevence to this one

punkin_26 16

243-your name annoys me!

punkin_26 16

I actually looked at your pic and you are a very pretty girl- but your attitude is ugly. And when your 90 years old that is all you will have left. dreamcometrue-yeah more like a freakin nightmare!

326 you are a conceited, arrogant, idiot. Not every guy cares how big your tits are. Some guys like smaller tits better, and most could care less about it.

drawmesunshine 17

You're a confident slut who makes sandwiches? Right.

mojojojo91 6

Yeah well, no one asked you talk about yourself. You made an ignorant comment so of course people will come at you. Dumbass.

You can stop talking now we have heard you say how big your tits are like 3 times. Look at how many thumbs up you have then tell me who gives a shit

Your dad is a creep and YDI for buying a wonderbra.

341 I'm a boy. So evidently I have no tits. You are even more idiotic than I made you out to be.

thrAsHeRr9081 16

Well, it IS false advertisement.

You're wrong

shay1813 0

Really wrong

smiley1014 23

I really think they meant the current president for lies and manipulation. Nothing any republican has ever done compares.

Maxxy928 7

I swear every time I think I have a good comment someone on FML beats me to it.

drawmesunshine 17

At Victoria's Secret, I saw a bra advertised as upping your boobs 3 cup sizes. THREE. I would punch a hoe in her tiny tits for lying to me like that. Anything with that much padding screams insecurity and desperation.

214-u gave away victorias' secret!! :o Haha

punkin_26 16

200-good for you. not sure why all the homophobes down voted you but you have every right to voice your opinion.

punkin_26 16

Men do have the option for peck implants though.

332, I don't think he got voted down because people are homophobes, but just because they really didn't need to know that, or couldn't really relate to it... Kind of like if one of those people that gets turned on by cars (mechanophiles?) said, "Who needs a vagina? I can just have sex with an exhaust pipe." You have to keep in mind what you're implying when you say you don't like people getting voted down for talking about their unusual sexual tendencies...

"There's nothing unusual about being sexually attracted to cars. They're beautiful." Don't get me wrong, I'm not a homophobe, or anti-gay, or anything of the sort. It's just that many people are very hypocritical when it comes to stereotyping; they tend to be quite happy with some forms of it, yet they protest loudly against others. Also, when I said "unusual", I meant it in a purely mathematical/statistical sense, I wasn't saying that it is wrong. Something can be unusually good or bad, or just unusual. I would have said "uncommon", but I think it would have taken away from the meaning of my comment.

Small boobs: perky perfection for decades. Big boobs: end up falling into your pits when you lay on your back by age 25.

#214 Not all small-boobed women opt to wear padded bras. I never have. I may have tiny tits and I may not love them, but please don't go on a tiny-tit hating crusade just because the idiots at Victoria's Secret invented a gross bra.

punkin_26 16

378-I still don't see what is so offensive about his comment. So he's gay, so he likes a great set of abs. And tell me something. You say it is because the average FMLer doesn't want to hear that or can't relate to it-so how well do you relate to a girl with bra troubles?

Cant be an advertisement considering women (and their boobs) arent a product.

cptmorgan6 8

Right in the kisser!!

was this really a nessesary comment?

Yes... I believe it was

Tig ol bitties

Boob Beauty is in the eye of the beholder?

There is nothing wrong with someone liking a woman with smaller breasts but someone who is into that wouldn't go after one that looks like she has larger ones.

*boob beauty is in the eye of the boob holder

Boob beauty is in the hand of the beholder lol.

pokopiko 9

Your profile picture goes wonderfully with this FML. c:

Lmfao I'm sorry OP. Fyl. Are you 12?

missyj0 12

Not everyone over the age on 12 has huge tits, they come in all different shapes and sizes :D

^^ probably has small tits.... ;)

rudegirlmania 10

162, just because you can't get tits of any size in your face, doesn't mean you have to hate the world

I was going to say the same thing..

154, Different shapes? Is there a triangle shaped boobs that would be so cool triangles are the best you know why because it has 3 sides

AuroraBorealis_fml 0

sup kayty ^.^

OMG aurora add me You realize how ironic this is :D

AuroraBorealis_fml 0

loolyeahh

DerpyHooves 0

I don't think age has that much to do with breast size. Breast development, yes, but not the size.

perdix 29

Is your dad Jerry Seinfeld?

TheCurlyTheory 0

Ah, yes, gotta love Jerry Seinfeld.

perdix 29

Haha, but no, you've gotta love The Drake.

himynameiskrista 0

I HATE the drake.