Today, I was working at a grocery store when a couple of my co-workers called a code pink in aisle 22, which means there was an attractive woman in that aisle. After hearing about how hot she was, I went over to see her for myself. It was my mom. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was working as a host at a pasta diner. The hostess I was working with was very attractive and we were flirting quite a bit. A large woman walked in to be seated, and I leaned over to her and dared her to ask the woman if she wanted two chairs. She leaned back and said, "That's my mom." FML
Today, I was in Walmart with my mom. I was looking for some CDs I wanted and saw a cute guy. Then he nodded at me and as he started to walk towards me, I hear my name being called over the intercom. Apparently, according to my mom, it was time to go. FML
Today, I was at the store when I saw two extremely hot girls. I walked into their aisle and they looked at me and smiled. I stopped and pretended to look at something so I could listen to what they were saying. They started laughing and walked away. It turned out I was reading a box of tampons. FML
Today, I saw my crush working the only open till at the grocery store. When she saw me approach her queue, she immediately called for more cashiers. FML
Today, at work at a grocery store an old couple came through my checkout lane. As I was putting their bagged groceries in the cart, the old man started feeling me up. FML
Today, while at the grocery store, I saw my mother. I thought it would be funny to scare her by sneaking up and grabbing her ass. Not only was it not my mom, I left the place with a ban from ever returning to that store. FML
Today, as I was just finishing my grocery shopping, a little girl and her mother walked past. Seeing the little girl staring at me, I waved. The girl then pointed to me and asked her mother "Mommy, is that man pregnant?" FML
Today, I went to the mall with my mom. We were in American Eagle shopping for spring clothes, when a few good looking guys walked by and whistled at me. I smiled at them. They were checking out my mom, not me. FML
Today, I was browsing the People of Walmart site, chuckling at all the weirdos on there, when I came across a picture of my mom. FML
Today, a woman had a wardrobe malfunction right in front of me. As if that's not awkward enough, that woman was my own mother. FML
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Top comments
24788 7
Your mom must be a babe.
neverland_fml 0
Compliment to your mama~Hopefully you got her genes.
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Comments (111)
harlehatschi 0
ydi for participating in creepy "code pinks" but kudos for already having seen the inside of that ******
MagneticGuitar 0
Nice username :D
Katie89 0
I work in a hospital, where "code pink" means an abduction.
arthuritis 0
FYL for actually HAVING a "code pink".
ChefBoy6382 0
whats the big deal?
eff_it_d00d 0
Yeah, your mom is hot so your life is ******. Come ON.
yer_maw 1
#1 ******* EXACTLY! The Inbetweeners FTW ;D And since your mom's hawt then the chances are you are hawt too, so don't complain :P
ohhhhshizzz 0
#22 & 23. Shut the hell up. OP: Rofl, you should go up and be like well I just got aisle 22's number and I'm in for EVERY holiday.
TheUnnamedOne 0
#7 for zee win!!
thelonelylurker 0
Congratz, your mom is a total babe.