313
By Anonymous / Thursday 16 August 2012 21:09 / United States
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There's no way OP didn't deserve this. But now I'm curious which American state he/shes in. It could explain a lot.

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Yeah I had to read the FML again to ensure if OP if fact did say "mom". If grabbing mother's ass in public is normal for OP, then I don't even want to know what goes on inside that house.

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"Honey I got your whittle weenie. Ha ha jokes on you!". "Oh mother, you're such a joker." I think it'd go something like that..

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127 - I was born and raised in Saudi Arabia and I gotta agree. Ass grabbin' is quiet common over there. Guys do it to other guys too :S I personally never quiet adopted that ass lovin culture... - good country btw. I miss Riyadh every day :-(

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Its something we do in pakistan too, except we do grabbing and lightly kicking or punching so i never really get used to it :$

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Man, if I was that woman I'd shit myself first and then proceed to beat the hell out of you with my 10 lb hand bag.

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So let me get this straight... In some middle eastern countries, grabbing family ass is normal? I thought us Americans were weird

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It sounds to me that OP got lucky in this situation. Because, I mean, who the fuck wants to grab their mother's ass?!?! Perhaps he/she thought this was MLIB.

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Why would a son want to do this to his mum? It seems like such an odd thing. Is this common practice in the USA? I know it isn't in Canada.

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I can just imagine the explanation. "you see ma'am, I thought you were my mom...and...what? No, I'm being serious!"

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So from this FML, I now know that in some countries it's not only normal to grab your mothers ass but also the rest of your family's too... If I did that to anyone in my family I think they'd have a panic attack and send me away.

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When I was young, and even now still, my mom pinches my ass. But she doesn't grab it that's weird. I know when I'm playing hockey and were celebrating a goal or a win we'll slap each others asses but that's common in a lot of sports

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yeah, it's great to be a woman there. - if you like hell on earth. drive a car? NO! show your face? NO! leave the house without a man 'owner' (father/husband) DEAD! fuck NO

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Next time make sure it is your mom. Also, it would have been better if it was a sister. It is still weird, but this would be more enjoyable.

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Alabama, born and bred, and I am not an ass grabbin' hillbilly yall! My grammar is not bad. I made it bad in the first sentence to show people who think of the stereotype, about how we talk, are wrong.

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42- It seems you vastly underestimated the amount of southern people on FML. On an unrelated note, it sure is hotter than a fried squirrel in the middle of July down here. Y'all.

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103, Your grammar isn't all that great either. The commas in the last sentence were completely unnecessary. Yes, I agree that the stereotype of "hics" and "hillbillies" and "rednecks" having bad grammar is just that, a stereotype, but after all... All stereotypes have root in the truth. Nowadays it doesn't matter where you're from though, bad grammar has spread through the world like a plague.

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I dedicate a song to OP... I like big butts and I can not lie You other brothers can't deny That when your mom walks in with an itty bitty waist And a round thing in your face You get sprung...

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...let me modify the song a bit more... :-) You like big butts and you can not lie We other brothers can't deny That when your mon walks in with an itty bitty waist And a round thing in your face You get sprung... Much better ;-)

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131, I was taught that commas can surround a spot that is like a side comment. Something about if you can read it without the stuff in the commas, its fine.

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155- You should be able to remove what is in the commas and have it make sense. However, in your case, the commas were not only unnecessary but poor grammar. Commas are used to indicate a slight pause, which your sentence did not have or need.

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131- Those commas were to indicate a pause in the sentence. 133- I never even mentioned the word hicks so how could I have misspelled it?

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173, I used two commas: one at the start to indicate who I was talking to, one at the end to indicate a pause.

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#195 if you didn't use hicks in the sentence, why do you think they were correcting you? They were correcting #131

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Lol that comment didn't say anything about you misspelling anything. It just said your grammar was less than 100%.

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175- i slap my mom in the ass, but i'm just playing around obviously... She does it to me too cause I get super pissed and she thinks it's funny... The point is, it may be weird, but it's not really "unacceptable"... Unless the son does it to get turned on, (*shudders*) then yeah, that's pretty....disturbing....

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185, slapping and grabbing are two very different things, whether it your mom or your girlfriend. I know you specifically didn't mention a girlfriend, but think of the implications of doing each to her. Slapping implies a more playful tone, while grabbing implies a more intimate meaning. Slapping your mom's ass could be considered more socially acceptable, whereas grabbing mom's ass tends to have more of a shutter affect. Joking or not...

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175- I personally don't even do it to my girlfriend, I have respect for women... But I was raised differently then everyone else, so you can't blame me

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These are the easy FMLs. I didn't even need to read halfway before promptly hitting Ydi. I'm sorry but that was stupid and wrong on so many levels it's painful to read.

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110 - I don't think many people on this site are going to get that joke, at least not for the right reason.

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# 34 they all posted at pretty much the same time. Sorry they didn't read each others minds first in an attempt to avoid annoying you.

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They simply said it wasn't their mom. They would have probably mentioned if it had been the store manager. It was probably another innocent shopper. YDI for sure, Op. You grab your mother's ass to scare her? That might scare her but not the way you intended.

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Guilty as charged. I occasionally speculate to make for a more interesting comment, or when I can't think of anything else to say. The hair dye FML would be an example. They're either hit or miss; in this case, the latter.

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