Wanker and Intimacy: Caught in 4K - FML

Caught in 4K

By Evil_Egbert - 12/02/2009 11:54 - Netherlands

Spicy

Today, I found out that when I masturbate at night while watching internet porn I cast a huge shadow on the curtain and the entire street is able to see it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 945

You deserved it 54 336

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Same thing different taste

By JoeyDizz - 06/05/2009 03:41 - United States

Spicy

Today, while masturbating at the computer, I was interrupted by a flash of light out of the corner of my eye. As I turned to face it, I realized I forgot to close the blinds. Standing at the window in the appartment across the street were two girls, one had a camera and was snapping a second shot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 308

You deserved it 66 704

By Anonymous - 24/02/2012 19:18 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was posing in front of the mirror, when I realized that everyone who looks at me can easily tell which arm I use to masturbate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 745

You deserved it 37 969

On a loop

By Anonymous - 28/10/2023 05:00 - United States - St Louis

Spicy

Today, I got home after a long day and decided to unwind a bit. I put some porn on the TV but promptly fell asleep. I woke up three hours later to the same video playing, but realized a had left my blinds open. I broadcasted three hours of Athena Faris having sex to my whole street. FML

I agree, your life sucks 117

You deserved it 480

Caught

By losingstreak - 31/01/2009 20:47 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was looking at porn on my laptop when my mom came into my room to talk to me. After she finished what she was saying, she paused and said, "You know, I can see the reflection of your computer screen in your glasses." FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 252

You deserved it 38 025

By MyHeadHurts - 20/01/2012 10:42 - Ireland

Spicy

Today, I got bored looking at porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 213

You deserved it 39 612

By Spawn_of_Satan - 27/03/2009 15:18 - Hong Kong

Today, whilst my parents and I were out, my older brother thought it would be funny to play porn on my computer. At full volume. With my window wide open. Now my next-door neighbors tell their kids I'm a spawn of Satan, and the weird guy from across the street winks at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 134

You deserved it 7 427

Caught in 404pp

By danggit3290 - 03/05/2009 17:17 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was masturbating in the dark with the door open. I thought I saw a figure outside my door, because I didn't have my glasses on. After intensely staring at the dark figure for about a minute, thinking it was my imagination, my stepdad said, "You know, I'm looking RIGHT at you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 033

You deserved it 89 513

Caught in the act

By MeAgainDr - 08/08/2023 04:00 - Australia - Perth

Spicy

Today, I was taking advantage of an empty house to try and re-spark my sex drive. Despite my best efforts, I got bored and started watching something else, but when my housemate returned suddenly, I panicked - gave a guilty shout and fumbled my dick away as I changed the monitor over - back to porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 179

You deserved it 761

By Anonymous - 24/11/2015 13:17 - United States - Westborough

Spicy

Today, I was jerking off quietly so my roommates wouldn't hear me. In the middle of it, one of them sent me a screenshot of an error message on a porn site, asking if I was having the same problem. I guess I wasn't being so quiet after all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 322

You deserved it 6 920

Wait until she's left the room at least!

By Anonymous - 08/09/2024 11:00 - United States - Truckee

Spicy

Today, I messed up by forgetting that reflections on glasses can make a private experience VERY public. I only this realized after my mom asked what I was looking at; she definitely saw a lot more dick than she would have liked. I feel like such a perv. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89

You deserved it 421

Next

Top comments

mcdiaz 0

Friday 20 February 2009 23:30

Kind of like an X-rated batsignal

redhead10 0

Thursday 5 March 2009 20:49

#27 i'm sorry but watching **** in the privacy of your own home does not make you a pervert. get over yourself.

Comments

z_vet 0

Thursday 12 February 2009 14:36

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

rwac07 0

Sunday 21 March 2010 2:37

the crowd wants an encore

awesomeooo3 0

Sunday 27 February 2011 23:22

hahahahah op that's hilarious!!

hippo1234 19

Friday 25 April 2014 6:03

Better than casting a small shadow....

greenman_fml 0

Thursday 12 February 2009 15:41

take pride in displaying your manhood to the world

haggymypants 3

Monday 22 November 2010 4:04

you look like hitler.

Poepiepiesie 3

Sunday 5 December 2010 10:41

Carry your pride, strong and upright.

borba72 0

Thursday 12 February 2009 16:27

Man. This one was funny, congrats. Try and change the position of your monitor so you can jack off without projecting your shadow.

niftyhasdelulz 12

Monday 18 August 2014 1:46

That made my day. Haha thanks OP!

arms_akimbo 0

Thursday 12 February 2009 17:46

Thaaaaat's pretty funny.

ReMiX_fml 0

Monday 16 February 2009 18:41

i can see it, "daddy whats that thing going up and down on our neighbors window?"..."oh he's sexually pleasuring himself." hahaha

Black_Lord747 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 15:57

Lol Ori....

necomni 0

Thursday 19 February 2009 4:15

Oh, the possibilities... the comments to this are funny, too!

mcdiaz 0

Friday 20 February 2009 23:30

Kind of like an X-rated batsignal

acke01 14

Thursday 23 October 2014 1:56

That comment just made my day.

heathallin 0

Tuesday 24 February 2009 17:41

#19 haha, so politically correct, yet so thorough and yea, i've seen some puppet shows in progress, pretty entertaining

abbottizer 0

Monday 2 March 2009 9:30

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Keywords

Awkward Love Friends Cute Haircut Miscellaneous Relatable Work Cars You're fired Kids Parenting DIY Cats Family Intimacy Sex Am I overreacting? Management Poopoo peepee Coworkers Frustration Capitalism Transportation Animals ADHD Dogs Dating Anxiety Technology

The Top

Today, thanks to pregnancy hormones, I had the most vivid dream of eating a caramel apple mousse cake with vanilla bean ice cream. Unfortunately, yesterday, also thanks to pregnancy hormones, I was diagnosed with diabetes. My dreams are taunting me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 932

You deserved it 266

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Feeling goofy, I thought it’d be funny to try to reenact that horrible sex scene from the movie Showgirls. I threw my body back, but completely lost my balance and smashed my head on the headboard. I ended up with a bad concussion and a huge hospital bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 839

You deserved it 2 157

The Top

Today, my husband told me "The only reason I stay with you is because it's cheaper than paying child support." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 091

You deserved it 5 793

Today, I swerved to avoid running over a dead cat in the road. Instead, I ran over its head. The crack of its skull was loud enough for me to hear it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 363

You deserved it 8 482

Today, my twin sister gave birth and somehow now weighs less than before she was pregnant. She also has huge boobs now and not a stretch mark in sight. Meanwhile, I’m still carrying an extra 15 pounds, even though I gave birth 5 years ago, and so many stretch marks I look like a fat zebra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 516

You deserved it 345

Today, I woke up feeling great. I opened up the blinds and looked out from my window just in time to see a man ripping my mailbox from the ground and sprinting away with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 447

You deserved it 2 640

Today, I found out that when I text my boyfriend, he isn't the one to read them. Instead, he pays his friend to "keep the bitch busy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 007

You deserved it 6 995

Today, I was a pregnant man for Halloween. Everyone at school thought it was funny, except my principal, who gave me a detention and said it was, "inappropriate and making a pregnant teacher feel uncomfortable". That pregnant teacher asked me to take a selfie with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 854

You deserved it 2 711