Today, my girlfriend was going down on me. She only did it for 30 seconds, stopped, then said, "I'm not in the mood anymore." FML
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College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, my girlfriend were having sex. When I finished, she whispered in my ear, "30 seconds." FML
Today, while going down on my girlfriend, she stopped moaning and told me to stop because she couldn't fake it anymore. FML
Today, my girlfriend said she didn't want to have sex because it takes too long. FML
Today, in the middle of having sex, my girlfriend stopped moaning. I asked what was wrong. She said, "I'm bored." FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. She was on top, and then stopped, got off, and said, "Let's go get ice cream." I think this was her way of telling me I suck at sex. FML
Today, I went to my girlfriend's and she was wearing some sexy lingerie. After making out passionately for 10 minutes, I started to undress myself, only to have her stop me, confessed that she still wasn't sexually attracted to me. FML
Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, and she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said, "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML
Today, I made love to my girlfriend. I penetrated her for a while, then stopped to get my breath back... She carried on moaning even though I'd stopped moving. FML
Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, she suddenly said : "Are you going to be done any time soon?" FML
Today, while I was going down on my girlfriend, she fell asleep. She said she was too tired to fake it. FML
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Top comments
amayakitty 0
thirty seconds is forever in head time. when you're giving it, anyway. just saying.
perdix 31
That sucks . . . for thirty seconds. She was probably pissed that you were watching the World Series instead of her bobbing up and down on your dick. They want to know that their work is being noticed.
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Comments (170)
luckymagruder 4
I will say this first- I am a noobie. I was wonderin what gets a comment "moderated", and who does it? And right now I'm goin to look for a FAQ page. go easy on me
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
It broke the rules, so the moderators deleted that comment. It's different than getting banned; only that comment is deleted, and you can still post others (though you might get a warning). You can find the rules and the FAQs on the desktop site, but unfortunately, in the apps or on the mobile site, AFAIK.
stewpididiot 11
obviously, she doesn't like the taste of hand lotion. PATOOEY !!!
pavloviandoggy 4
This might come as a surprise, but a lot of girls really don't enjoy giving blow jobs. It takes a lot of concentration and skill to keep your gag reflex from acting on up no matter what the guy tastes like. And it does feel like forever if you don't want to do it in the first place. Plus, we don't know what led up to it. What if the OP pressured her into giving him a *******, and she was never in the mood in the first place? Even if she didn't feel like going down on him, she would've suggested finishing off with intercourse if she was actually horny.
syedlink27 0
girls like you are lame. really women enjoy oral. both giving and receiving.
soundingriot 6
not true. very few. if any, girls actually enjoy it. and it's stupid to think that every girl would
RedPillSucks 33
@107 perhaps you pay for yours, but #88 is right. I'm sure however, that she would enjoy it more if she could anticipate being on the receiving end instead of just doing the giving. Especially if OP doesn't keep himself clean or clean-shaven.
CarrieSlim 0
Wow! What girl would stop? Your probably really small.....or too big to handle haha
rileysmileydog 0
wash your balls!
kittysammich_fml 0
could have not gotten anything, but blue balls isnt cool
viper2kus 0
HELLO BLUE BALLS
nickgavis83 0
...
mpphish 0
blue balls! what'd you do to piss her off earlier?
redrovaa 0
Oh boohoo.