By cthulhu help me - 01/03/2013 18:22 - United States - Cabot

Today, my boss gave me the task of firing a recently-hired coworker next Friday. This guy spends most of his off-hours working out, probably abusing the fuck out of steroids, and to whom prison is like a bed-and-breakfast. I fear for my life by this point. FML
I agree, your life sucks 32 649
You deserved it 2 817

Same thing different taste

Top comments

HandaPitler 1

Write him a note and sign it with your bosses name

I get why your boss wants you to fire him, but that's not fair


I get why your boss wants you to fire him, but that's not fair

fishstick557 14

I forget who told me but it was a buddy who was in your situation I think he had like bodyguards or police with him I can't remember but your safety is priority in this situation. Good luck OP

I thought the HR person does the firing, with the boss present. At least, that's how it has always been done at every job I've worked at. The boss is a coward, shows lack of leadership skills, and appears to be a pussy. Good luck OP!

Tell your boss that he's the one who should be firing people. It's not your responsibility. FYL

Then his boss might fire him right away

It could very well be OP's responsibility. Most places have different departments. OP could be a manager of one and that would make it their responsibility to fire people under them.

My boss has made me fire people too and its not in my job description but you gotta do what the boss says.

HandaPitler 1

Write him a note and sign it with your bosses name

Include his address as well. Wait... is that going to far.

Not at all, maybe include a phone number too just in case he's not home, u can track 'em down!

laya_fml 26

That's when you say you tried to convince your boss to keep him, and because you stood up for him you have to fire him. Blame the boss and run.

Get a gun and fire him from at least twenty feet away.

or have greenie take him down for you.

I hope he doesn't shoot the messenger.

I have Cthulhu's number. He's busy these days but he may consider it.

I shot him an email, he says he's free next Tuesday. I'll need your name, address, bank, and social security number, OP.

Email - you're brilliant! His fax machine and pager are out of commission.

Tell him through voicemail or email 5 mintues before you get off work. Then get in your car and take a trip far out of town for the weekend.

Problem is that the idiot boss might make it into a permanent vacation. I do not envy OP's position.

Steroids shrinks your balls, so he literally won't have the balls to attack you. Either that or he'll have a huge 'roid rage explosion and grind you into pulp.


I did steroids once. They're those tgings where you butter down wooden stairs and try to walk down them without falling, correct?