Today, my girlfriend was going down on me. She only did it for 30 seconds, stopped, then said, "I'm not in the mood anymore." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend were having sex. When I finished, she whispered in my ear, "30 seconds." FML
Today, while going down on my girlfriend, she stopped moaning and told me to stop because she couldn't fake it anymore. FML
Today, my girlfriend said she didn't want to have sex because it takes too long. FML
Today, in the middle of having sex, my girlfriend stopped moaning. I asked what was wrong. She said, "I'm bored." FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. She was on top, and then stopped, got off, and said, "Let's go get ice cream." I think this was her way of telling me I suck at sex. FML
Today, I went to my girlfriend's and she was wearing some sexy lingerie. After making out passionately for 10 minutes, I started to undress myself, only to have her stop me, confessed that she still wasn't sexually attracted to me. FML
Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, and she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said, "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML
Today, I made love to my girlfriend. I penetrated her for a while, then stopped to get my breath back... She carried on moaning even though I'd stopped moving. FML
Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, she suddenly said : "Are you going to be done any time soon?" FML
Today, while I was going down on my girlfriend, she fell asleep. She said she was too tired to fake it. FML
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Top comments
amayakitty 0
thirty seconds is forever in head time. when you're giving it, anyway. just saying.
perdix 31
That sucks . . . for thirty seconds. She was probably pissed that you were watching the World Series instead of her bobbing up and down on your dick. They want to know that their work is being noticed.
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Comments (170)
MysteryGuitarMan 32
well, thats very funny, i have favorite this one, thumbs up! mgm
foost 0
I hate when they f***in pull that crap
lunkness_monster 0
Highly acceptable face rape moment.
danielf357 0
wow that happened to me like 2 weeks ago. it sucks
raspberryboo 10
story of my life
pondscum 0
At least you got some, right?
rick_maahea 12
um maybe take a shower once a year. if that isn't the problem, ask they guy she's cheating on you with what you aren't doing right.
Plaasmaa 4
You're balls are so blue, I bet they call you jack frost!
Tarah2112 3
I do that to my boyfriend sometimes lol.. They aren't always fun to give and sometimes I just don't want to
rainbowteehee 6
How is that "fml" get over it. U both should be doing it to each other