Neighbours

Halloween (slight return)

By fuck you and that stupid mutt - 02/11/2021 08:00

Today, I was outside carving pumpkins with my kids in the grass in my apartments. This rabid Karen starting screaming about the mess we were making. First of all, we were putting the pulp in a bag; second, she lets her dog bark all night and never cleans up it’s shit whenever it goes on our property. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 099

You deserved it 100

There goes the neighborhood…

By Anonymous - 21/10/2021 11:00

Today, my drunk neighbor couldn’t get into his apartment and thought it would be a good idea to poop in our yard. He left a pile of diarrhea under our window, and poop-stained napkins all over the lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 037

You deserved it 68

Renegade neighbor

By Fuck you, Yolanda! - 19/10/2021 22:00

Today, I have an egregious delinquent neighbor. She is always using internet and electrical services illegally, but is always getting packages from Amazon. Her packages are always left at my place, as she is so afraid of tax collectors, she won't open the door. She gave my billing address without my consent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 266

You deserved it 139

Spooky season

By soccerbuddyz - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I got a complaint from my neighbor about a little girl staring at her through my guest bedroom window for the past month. I live alone. Now I'm scared to live in my own house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 917

You deserved it 3 805

Welcome!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I went over to welcome this new couple to our subdivision with a bottle of wine and muffins. I told them I liked what they were doing with the place, then asked them when they had moved in. They replied, "Two years ago." FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 539

You deserved it 38 388

STOP!

By Anonymous - 28/09/2021 20:00

Today, for the second week in a row, I woke up to the sound of my awful upstairs neighbors having sex between the hours of 1 and 3 AM. Their bed is so noisy, and earplugs barely help. At this point, based on the rhythm of their bed squeaking, I can tell when they're about to finish, and I hate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 721

You deserved it 173

Cat litter day

By Anonymous - 15/09/2021 14:01

Today, I found out my new neighbour tried to report me as a terrorist for, "speaking terrorist language and moving bags of that explosive fertiliser." I’m Japanese, and the bags were mostly rotting vegetables and animal dung. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 317

You deserved it 104

Modern warfare

By Anonymous - 11/09/2021 22:59 - Canada - Ottawa

Today, as I enjoyed my peaceful evening, I realized that my redneck neighbors had gone into the hills to shoot machine guns. How the almighty f**k did they get MACHINE GUNS? FML

I agree, your life sucks 986

You deserved it 203

Respect

By it’s still cheating! - 05/09/2021 11:01 - United States - Hesperia

Today, my wife, who’s been a stay at home mom since our kids were born, hasn’t really been out looking for a day job since they’re old enough to be in school full time now. She has however been day-drinking and hooking up with the neighbor's wife. She insists she’s not gay, just experimenting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 841

You deserved it 214

There goes the neighborhood

By Anonymous - 28/08/2021 22:00

Today, our neighbors have the most beautiful garden, with hundreds of crocuses in spring. Actually, that was our former neighbors. The new owners have since dug up all the flower bulbs, thrown them out, and replaced them with some lovely decorations made of old car tires. FML

I agree, your life sucks 952

You deserved it 137

Fred Durst stan

By Deaf Biscuit - 26/08/2021 20:01

Today, my neighbour across the street has entered his ninth consecutive hour of playing Limp Bizkit at full blast. The only thing overriding my concern for his mental health is my sheer surprise that they have 9 hours of original music. FML

I agree, your life sucks 921

You deserved it 106

Stinky neighborhood

By Anonymous - 11/08/2021 22:01

Today, I came home to a terrible smell in the apartment. Three hours, and a scoured kitchen later, I took the trash out. The smell was not my apartment, but from just across the alley; a neighbor had moved and emptied their fridge. Six more days of sunned milk until pickup. FML

I agree, your life sucks 980

You deserved it 68

Isn't that illegal?

By Ryan Engle - 29/07/2021 02:01

Today, my neighbor, who has 4 video cameras pointed at the front of my house, got a drone that’s now hovering over my backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 122

You deserved it 78

We live in a society

By Anonymous - 28/07/2021 06:01

Today, I can't any peace and quiet in any room of my flat. The neighbours on one side are arguing, the other side are having very loud sex, the ones upstairs I suspect are playing some sort of games console, and downstairs daughter has been practising her violin badly all morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 019

You deserved it 142

Vengeance is mine

By shitty neighbor - 25/07/2021 10:01 - United States

Today, I had to call the cops on my neighbor. I was heading off to work when I saw him actually shitting in our yard. The reason? They caught my dumbass rebel of a son on their security camera, shitting in their yard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 925

You deserved it 495

Snared

By drummerboy - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I practiced my drum playing in the garage instead of my room out of consideration for my neighbors. Guess the consideration wasn't mutual, because one of my neighbors just shot a hole in one of my drums with an air gun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 853

You deserved it 2 241

Annoying neighbors ruin everything

By so much for relaxing - 21/07/2021 06:01

Today, I decided to sit on the back porch for a while to enjoy the nice weather and relax. Unfortunately, one of my neighbors was outside too, having a very loud argument with his wife for about 45 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 982

You deserved it 95

Demon child

By never again! - 22/06/2021 02:01

Today, I was babysitting my nephew. He was acting up, so instead of spanking him, I put him in the corner for timeout. He screamed and thrashed and kicked the walls so hard my neighbors called the police. My sister wasn’t answering her phone, and I had to explain why a 7-year-old was acting like that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 101

You deserved it 129

Acrophobia

By Matthew Smith - 21/06/2021 21:01 - United Kingdom

Today, my new drone got stuck on the neighbour's roof. I'd bought the drone to look at my roof because I don’t like going up on ladders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 518

You deserved it 659

Footloose

By Imnotfromhere - 16/06/2021 10:59

Today, my neighbor told me to stop pushing the elevator buttons and opening doors with my feet. I bitched him out, because he's been making a huge issue out of it for months. Right after, I realized I forgot my keys inside and he's the only person around who could let me back into the building. FML

I agree, your life sucks 186

You deserved it 1 873

Drunk

By Anonymous - 13/06/2021 17:59

Today, I awoke in my bathtub, water all over the floor, all the way into my living room. I drank too much so I don't remember getting into the bath, I have no clue how long I was in there, and I got a message from the manager of my apartment complex telling me the water had leaked into the apartment below. FML

I agree, your life sucks 236

You deserved it 1 580

Library time

By Anonymous - 23/05/2021 14:00

Today, after a long day, I decided to study. I was so tired and anxious that I couldn't. When I actually started, a neighbour started making a hole in his wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 787

You deserved it 125

Through the wall

By Jeynna - 08/05/2021 00:01

Today, I bumped into my next door neighbor. She said, "Not for nothing, but I heard you fighting with your boyfriend last night, you're pretty harsh on him." I don't have a boyfriend, I was just drunk and castigating myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 531

You deserved it 885

Snitches get bitches

By d for vendetta - 21/04/2021 23:00

Today, after weeks of asking my neighbor nicely to pick up his dog’s crap out of the common area, I got fed up and reported him to the landlord and the city. He’s now been given two options; either get rid of his dog or move out. He’s now sworn revenge on me, even though he was the one being gross. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 327

You deserved it 260

Splish splash, I was taking a bath

By Anonymous - 15/04/2021 13:59 - Canada

Today, my neighbour decided to get high while leaving his bathtub running, resulting in passing out and starting a flood in the hallways. FML

I agree, your life sucks 975

You deserved it 63

For Those About to Rock…

By ljajjanaa - 04/04/2021 11:00

Today, I had to politely request that my floormate not blast heavy metal music at 4 a.m. His response? "It’s the weekend," followed by him slamming the door in my face and turning the music up. I work weekends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 126

You deserved it 102

TMI

By Anonymous - 29/03/2021 21:59 - United States - Crystal City

Today, my neighbor, who is an elderly woman that I barely know, decided to tell me about how she feels she's lost too much weight and now when she looks at herself naked she thinks her boobs hang and look like bull testicles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 950

You deserved it 116

Kids will be kids

By bad influence - 29/03/2021 15:30 - United States

Today, I've been getting terrible backlash from the neighbors after I forbade my kids from hanging out with one of the neighborhood kids. They think I dislike her because she’s trans. The truth is she’s rude, disrespectful, has been in several fights and had run ins with the police. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 194

You deserved it 103

By fml9124 - 19/02/2021 19:58

Today, my neighbor yelled at me because her two kids got into my pool. They scaled a two-meter wall to get to my backyard. They used a tree in her yard that hangs over the wall. I guess I could install razor wire on top of the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 103

You deserved it 61

Pavarotti next door

By Anonymous - 18/02/2021 18:30 - United States - Pittsburgh

Today, I had to hear my neighbor whine again through the walls because he can't talk in a quiet voice. You can hear him from across the street, and that's before he gets drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 889

You deserved it 80

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, it was my birthday, and my boyfriend got surgery on his gallbladder because he had big gallstones. After they were removed, he was still a little out of it from the morphine. He gave the gallstones to me for my birthday. Better still, his mom suggested I make a necklace out of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 279

You deserved it 3 850

Today, I have horrible morning sickness. I was helping my daughter fingerpaint, when suddenly the smell of the paint set my stomach off. I threw up all over myself and her painting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 891

You deserved it 4 293

Today, my mom was driving with my brothers and sister in the back seat. She was turned around talking to us, when my sister told my mom that she missed the light. She ran it, then screamed at us about not paying attention and noticing your surroundings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 470

You deserved it 1 566

Today, my husband left our untrained puppy out of its kennel when he left for work. I got home and all of the baby books my parents just bought for us that were on the coffee table in a backpack were completely destroyed, along with the bag, and parts of our wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 682

You deserved it 414

Today, I have to figure out how to summon the courage to explain to my husband that I’m six weeks pregnant. We haven’t had sex since he got into a car accident that severely paralyzed him from the waist down about a year ago. The worst part? The father could be his brother or my coworker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 105

You deserved it 1 786

Today, I was taking a nap when my dad texted me, asking me to go check the mail. So I went outside, then the wind blew the front door shut, and it automatically locked. I didn’t have my key. FML

I agree, your life sucks 892

You deserved it 297