All the FMLs

Live through this

By Artist man - 08/01/2021 07:02 - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend walked out on me because she realised she doesn’t love me enough to go through a second lockdown with me and our 2-year-old daughter FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 196

You deserved it 117

Abusive

By Anonymous - 08/01/2021 05:00

Today, my dad threatened to hit me if I didn't tell him what I had in my homework. He thinks I won't keep secrets from him this way. There's a reason I kept secrets in the first place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 993

You deserved it 96

Cruisin' for a bruisin'

By leah - 07/01/2021 14:01 - United States - San Jose

Today, I was beaten up by a complete stranger for “giving her a dirty look.” I can’t see my own face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 892

You deserved it 111

Compassion

By Anemity_is_my_name - 07/01/2021 14:01 - United States

Today, I'm exhausted and sore from a long night of pulling semis out of the snow. My wife is pissed because I want to sleep, instead of be with her. Every time I drift off, she starts doing things like loudly unloading the dishwasher or standing by our bedroom door talking loudly on the phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 547

You deserved it 95

Healthcare for all

By Broken - 07/01/2021 11:01 - United States - Toledo

Today, thanks to America's opiate epidemic, I can no receive the pain management I require for broken ribs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 001

You deserved it 110

Shove it, lady

By Anonymous - 07/01/2021 13:58 - Germany - Ebersbach

Today, my neighbor complained that the trailers and sheds in my yard are ruining her view. The same neighbor who built her house right above my property, thereby ruining my view, and leaving not even enough space for a hedge in between. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 033

You deserved it 90

Deception

By Anonymous - 07/01/2021 11:01

Today, I found out that my husband, who was supposed to be in PA school, dropped out 6 and a half years ago and never even received his bachelor's. He started lying to me before we were even a year into dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 111

You deserved it 177

People are people

By Anonymous - 07/01/2021 08:02 - Netherlands - Almere

Today, after almost 2 months of working from home alone, I was out walking and heard 2 guys talking. One was sitting in his car smoking weed; the other was standing next to the car telling him how he was tested positive today. Maybe not mention you are Covid positive when you're not supposed to be in public at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 848

You deserved it 166

USA Number One!

By Anonymous - 06/01/2021 23:30 - United States - Wynnewood

Today, I live in the same country that deployed the National Guard to suppress peaceful BLM protests, yet allowed a bunch of psychotic Trump supporters to break into the Capitol. I’m ashamed to be human right now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 580

You deserved it 692

Noise annoys

By Anonymous - 07/01/2021 04:58 - Germany

Today, the cows on the neighboring farm have been lowing loudly for 3 days straight. The guy who runs the farm is unreachable. The people who own the farm and live right next to the stable claim they don’t hear a thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 743

You deserved it 156

Relax

By Anonymous - 07/01/2021 00:01 - South Africa - Johannesburg

Today, in the attempt to have a relaxing self-care evening, I ran a bath, threw in some bath salts then put a face mask on and hopped on in. After about 7 minutes of relaxing, my back started burning, so I got out only to discover the bath salts have given me a rash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 946

You deserved it 116

Assumptions

By sama - 06/01/2021 11:03 - United States - San Jose

Today, I was asked why I have stretch marks when I’m skinny. The stretch marks are from when I was recovering anorexic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 942

You deserved it 115

We live in a society!

By hungry n hypoglycemic - 06/01/2021 17:01

Today, after standing in line for most of my lunch break just to buy food, some asshole with a cart full of stuff cut in front of me. He claimed that he was there the whole time, and the whole line, plus the cashier backed him up. I missed lunch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 005

You deserved it 124

Work is hell

By Levi2411 - 06/01/2021 11:01

Today, I had to do the job of 3 to 4 people. Spending the first half in the bakery by myself, I then had to run over to the deli and cook everything for the day while helping lines of customers. Why? Because 8 people are on Covid leave. Instead of shutting down the department, welcome to hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 111

You deserved it 1 243

Family matters

By Anonymous - 06/01/2021 08:01

Today, like every other day, my dad thinks my sister is autistic and needs therapy. He wants me to think that too. I'm pretty sure she is just introverted and hates our family. I wonder why. FML

I agree, your life sucks 987

You deserved it 93

Good deeds

By Muddyidiot - 06/01/2021 05:01

Today, after I was done testing a group of people for Covid, the universe decided that no, the deed was not good enough. On the way to the bus stop, I slipped and had to ride home covered in mud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 827

You deserved it 144

You light up my life

By Anonymous - 06/01/2021 02:01

Today, I can’t sleep because the moon is full. No, wait, that’s actually the floodlight from the neighboring farm shining in my window. Apparently, they thought it a good idea to hook the thing up to a motion detector, so the cats and mice can play disco lights at midnight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 946

You deserved it 88

FEED ME

By Anonymous - 05/01/2021 23:02

Today, I woke up in a military hospital, after having all four wisdom teeth out yesterday. A nurse came in with a breakfast trolley full of eggs and bacon, looks at my pleading face, looks at her clipboard and says, "Only non-solid foods for you, private." FML

I agree, your life sucks 928

You deserved it 164

Grumpy git

By Anonymous - 05/01/2021 20:01

Today, my husband told me that he thinks I'm not doing real work because I laugh during online meetings. Sorry I'm not miserable all the time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 037

You deserved it 94

Iron Chef America

By Anonymous - 05/01/2021 19:59

Today, I thought about trying something "new", so I put raspberry preserves and maple syrup on my waffles. It tasted like cough medicine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 592

You deserved it 461

Leave me out of it

By Marissa Di Stefano - 05/01/2021 17:01

Today, my sister and mom were arguing. My sister was being really nasty to my mom, and decided to get nasty with me and drag me into the argument. Naturally, I got nasty back at her and we started fighting. My mom yelled at me for getting nasty with my sister, and kicked me out of the house for “being too nasty.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 910

You deserved it 214

You're my mommy now

By Lissy - 05/01/2021 14:02

Today, and everyday since we got a puppy in March, my husband is jealous of the puppy who follows me everywhere. He was the one that wanted the puppy and now he practically hates it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 930

You deserved it 198

Classic switcheroo

By Anonymous - 05/01/2021 11:01

Today, I had a movie date planned with a guy. After a polite exchange, we were interrupted by a phone call from his colleague saying they had an emergency that needed his attention. He excused himself to take the call, telling me he wouldn't be long. He drove off and blocked my number the moment he stepped out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 212

You deserved it 147

Time marches on

By Anonymous - 05/01/2021 00:58 - Canada - Brandon

Today, after looking back at our high school photos, I told my fiancée I’ve been scared lately that I’m getting uglier with age, and that I was much prettier back then. He got really quiet, and then agreed with me.. I’m only 24. FML

I agree, your life sucks 847

You deserved it 288

Things can only get better

By MaudlinMasters - 05/01/2021 02:01

Today, marks the 8-month anniversary of receiving my Masters degree. It also marks 8 months of depression and unemployment because the dream job in my field I was promised before graduation was rescinded due to COVID-19. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 175

You deserved it 134

By notgood - 04/01/2021 16:01 - Canada - Saskatoon

Today, I accidentally took an Ex Lax instead of an Immodium. It's gonna be a fun night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 703

You deserved it 321

It wasn't me

By Anonymous - 04/01/2021 19:01 - United Kingdom - Gosport

Today, my partner thought I was having an affair because I received a video call but declined it. It was from my daughter, and I declined it because I was already on a video call with my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 931

You deserved it 101

Misinformation

By Andrea - 04/01/2021 16:59

Today, my brother-in-law declared he does not want to be vaccinated against Covid, because his friend, who is a nurse, told him it could make him impotent. Can please someone remove her from the health system? FML

I agree, your life sucks 836

You deserved it 196

Disney 2021

By Anonymous - 04/01/2021 14:01

Today, I realised that I'm kinda living the life of a Disney princess, because I'm lonely and all my friends are animals. Yes, I also talk to them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 873

You deserved it 160

Missing the point

By Anonymous - 04/01/2021 07:58

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I checked his phone. The reason I did so was to get his mum’s number so I could arrange to send her his Xmas present in a parcel, as a surprise as I wouldn't be with him. He found out when he asked me how I managed it, and I told him honestly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 162

You deserved it 335

FML on Facebook

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I went on a first day with a guy. It went well up until he saw my phone, loudly declared that I was ‘gross’ for having an iPhone, and then stormed out. I’m on a family plan and if it were my choice, I would have got an Android. FML

I agree, your life sucks 929

You deserved it 260

Today, I dropped the collection basket during Christmas Mass at my Catholic church. Money and checks fell all over the floor and everyone was staring at me. I was too stunned to even pick it up. There were about 1,500 people from our town there and my family won't stop bringing it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 620

You deserved it 1 570

Today, I was talking to my mom about my issues with my girlfriend. While she was sympathizing, she slowly picked up my wallet, took $100 and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 134

You deserved it 2 269

Today, my daughter shaved her head in solidarity for a friend who went bald from cancer. Normally this would be an amazing gesture. Unfortunately, her “friend” is a fictional character from a book she’s reading. My daughter had almost 24-inch long hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 098

You deserved it 549

Today, I finally found out what happened to my ex-girlfriend from my high school days, since a few years ago she suddenly stopped using social media and never returned my texts or calls to see how she was doing. Turns out she died, and no one bothered to inform me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 315

You deserved it 112

Today, I was trying to learn how to whistle. On the elevator ride up to my room, I was experimenting with tongue placement and mouth position. At the height of my facial contortions and probable spitting, the elevator doors opened to reveal the guy I've been crushing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 206

You deserved it 649