Intimacy, Sex and Awkward: Sidelined - FML

Sidelined

By Anonymous - 24/09/2024 15:30 - India

Spicy

Today, I was supposed to go on a date with an old friend from college, who has totally turned into a hot MILF after marriage. Of course the date was pre-planned with some steamy sex at my place. However, last night her husband found out about her affair with her neighbour and now she can’t go out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80

You deserved it 642

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Same thing different taste

Unlucky in love

By Anonymous - 24/10/2022 10:00 - United States - Martinsburg

Today, it was supposed to be my first date with a girl I've been speaking to for three months. Last night, she revealed that she's still married, that her husband is "not so bad", and then confessed it all to him and blocked me. It was gonna be my first date in six years, after the last one stalked me across the country. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 084

You deserved it 153

Sounds fishy

By Anonymous - 13/02/2021 11:01

Today, I told my wife I wasn’t comfortable with her going out with an old guy friend. Petty, sure, but our sex life is non-existent. I found out that she's been seeing him behind my back for months, spent the night with him last week and claims there’s nothing going on. Trying to decide whether I should stay or go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 105

You deserved it 193

By FriendZone - 03/03/2017 16:00 - United States - Abington

Today, after what I thought was several weeks of flirting with a coworker, I asked her out on a date. She asked if it could be a double date, and I said yes. I brought a friend, she brought her husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 796

You deserved it 2 037

Bad omen

By DefiantBaka - 21/05/2022 08:00 - Canada - Stony Plain

Today, I found out the man I have a date with next week is married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 048

You deserved it 114

Strange dynamic

By Anonymous - 15/11/2021 01:59

Today, my husband has been texting women to see if he can go out on a date with one of them, just because I’ve befriended his friend and apparently, the movie and food I got with the friend was a first date, so now he wants to get even. FML

I agree, your life sucks 711

You deserved it 2 321

Watch the world crumble

By Anonymous - 06/06/2024 07:00 - United States

Today, I found out that the drop dead gorgeous fun bubbly woman I hit it off with is actually a disgusting, scheming whore who seduces married men, then blackmails them for money. I can’t afford to pay her, nor can I afford my wife to find out. I’m screwed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72

You deserved it 1 859

By sickandtiredofit - 24/01/2012 19:50 - United States

Today, I found out that my wife has been having an affair with the guy who's been trying to get our relationship back on track. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 361

You deserved it 3 123

By Anonymous - 30/10/2009 16:23 - United States

Today, I went to a social event with a very attractive male co-worker. Things were going awesome, we were flirting and really hitting it off. Then his 'wife' called. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 531

You deserved it 7 192

Misplaced fury

By Anonymous - 27/10/2023 15:00

Today, I was visited by a high school friend who lives in another state. She was furious because I got married a few months ago, and she kinda had feelings for me. I had to ask her to leave. Here's the funny thing: she's been married for 4 years and they have a son, and she didn't even invite me to her wedding back then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 504

You deserved it 56

By jimmy_poison - 09/02/2015 00:19 - New Zealand - Hamilton

Today, my date bumped into her ex-husband, who decided to join us for the rest of the dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 238

You deserved it 2 940

Next

Top comments

poopface82 19

Wednesday 25 September 2024 3:38

The correct answer depends on whether you were aware she was married.

Comments

poopface82 19

Wednesday 25 September 2024 3:38

The correct answer depends on whether you were aware she was married.

Keywords

Awkward Friends Love Haircut Miscellaneous Cute Relatable Work Cars You're fired Parenting Kids Family Cats DIY Sex Intimacy Am I overreacting? Poopoo peepee Management Frustration Capitalism Coworkers Transportation Dogs Animals ADHD Dating Technology Mental health

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Feeling goofy, I thought it’d be funny to try to reenact that horrible sex scene from the movie Showgirls. I threw my body back, but completely lost my balance and smashed my head on the headboard. I ended up with a bad concussion and a huge hospital bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 839

You deserved it 2 157

Today, it's day one of my suspension and probably being fired from my job. Why? I accidentally took a beer out my bag instead of a soda, then got distracted working to make sure everything got done. FML

I agree, your life sucks 99

You deserved it 517

The Top

Today, I was shopping with my boyfriend when we came across the most beautiful piece of Japanese furniture. When I inspected it closely, my boyfriend started laughing. Turns out I was making the same noise I make when I orgasm in reaction to a piece of furniture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 927

You deserved it 4 876

Today, I was at work at a coffee shop. We charge 50 cents every 15 minutes of use of our computers. An old man tried sneaking out without paying after being at a computer. As I was telling him to pay for his time, he threw a bagel at me and ran to his car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 027

You deserved it 100

Today, I accidentally connected my phone to my mum's headphones while watching porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 822

You deserved it 2 593

Today, I was walking home when a stranger came up to me and told me to give him a good reason why he shouldn't punch me in the face. I guess none were good enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 175

You deserved it 4 167

Today, what I thought was going to be a lunch date turned into a life insurance sales pitch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 211

You deserved it 3 898

Today, I just realized the harder my girlfriend comes during sex, the louder she snores after. I've tried earplugs but sometimes, like tonight, once I am up, I can't fall back to sleep. My choices are thus great sex and no sleep, or great sleep but no sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 264

You deserved it 5 818