Today, while walking to work, I swore I saw one of my old friends from college standing in the park across the street. I started shouting her name and waving my hands like a maniac to get her attention. It was a statue. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was walking down the street when I saw someone I thought I knew. I waved enthusiastically and shouted, "Hey!" The person stared blankly at me, so I quickly turned it into a wave at someone else behind them. There was no one behind them. I was just waving and yelling into the void like an idiot. FML
Today, I was walking outside when I saw my best friend about 100 meters away. I began running towards her, arms flailing, screaming out a tribal battle cry. It wasn't until I was nearly on top of her that I realised it was someone else. FML
Today, I was walking down the street and while stopped at a light, this old man waved at me. Thinking nothing of it, I walked through a parking lot to get to where I was going, where he not only followed me, but mistook me for a prostitute. It was 5pm. FML
Today, someone walking my way started waving. I waved back until I realized he wasn't looking at me. To make things worse, while walking past he said, "Get a fucking friend." FML
Today, I waved at someone across the street because I was absolutely certain they were my friend. They waved back, so I walked over. We stood there awkwardly for about ten seconds before I realized I had never seen this person in my life. Apparently they had waved at the person standing behind me. FML
Today, I ran into an old friend for whom I used to have feelings. I hadn't seen her in years, so I thought it would be funny if I went up to her and said, "Hey, you look familiar, do I know you?" She thought I had really forgotten her and burst into tears. FML
Today, I was at the store when I ran into an old friend from high school. He didn't recognize me at first, but when I told him who I was, he instantly shouted "Oh! Yeah! The fat chick from Mr. H's class!" FML
Today, I was at University when a giant mascot started walking in my direction. As they walked past, they whispered my name seductively. I still don't know who it was. FML
Today, I had to go to the mall for a quick errand. While there one of my friends who works at a phone booth was there and I stayed for a little bit chatting with him. While chatting, a girl passed by. She was so pretty that I blurted out, "What a woman!" out loud. Turns out it was my ex. FML
Today, I ran into an old friend from college on the bus to work. Having not seen each other in over 10 years, we spent a good 15 minutes talking about our lives after college. At the end, he asked me what my name was. FML
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Top comments
LaColombianita 26
It was your friend pretending to be a statue because they were embarrassed by your behavior.
ninjadinos 14
I hope you didn't do anything other than wave your hands, or you could be charged with statue-tory rape. Oh man..
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Comments (100)
LaColombianita 26
It was your friend pretending to be a statue because they were embarrassed by your behavior.
br0dawg 6
"Is that...is that Amy? Amy Derper? Amy! H-hey, Amy! It's me, Becca! Remember me? Amy! Amyyy!! AMY YOU STUPID BITCH, WHY AREN'T YOU---oh." Whatever, that's how I envisioned it.
taco_bender 12
Then people are walking past or looking out there cars wondering how the "special" girl got loose.
RedPillSucks 33
or she needs new prescription glasses
xoconnie 8
oh boy, someone needs glasses :D
Hidur 10
After reading this FML, I can kind of see why OP's only friend was a statue..
ilovedinosawers 17
-_-
RavenRiley007 4
Well it's more like FYEyesight
williamh327 5
R u sure it wasnt iron man from scool?
PinkElephants713 6
Maybe OP went to pigeon school, and met the statue at target practice.. That would be awesome :3 js !
kaycee1996 5
Lol! :D Made my day
BABYPUNCHINGGUY 0
What was your first hint that It was giant, metal and a bunch of birds were ******** on it.
livibobs98 7
mine to haha it kinda happened to me once
IOmnomHard 10
Well look at you. Getting all excited over an erection.
ycrem0n 21
It's probably "hard" to stay "firm" if you're excited. I believe OP waved her hands like a maniac just to get attention.
alexup24 13
were the "quotations" really "necessary"?
aimeegoldberg 22
45, 66- your profile pictures couldnt be more perfect
marmlr339 14
We've all done this before!
Roevera 14
Really? I must not be included in the word "all" because I've never maniacally tried to get someones attention...
sinking_fish 12
I've done it. Numerous times. I admit it with no shame! (well maybe just a little)
shanemaximo 7
Yeah, we have all made terrible comments at least once.
RedPillSucks 33
We've all done this to a statue? Really? This is a far cry from feeling up the store mannequin. We've all done that, right? What, just me? *slinks away to find a mannequin*
suil5129 6
Haha yes it has
ninjadinos 14
I hope you didn't do anything other than wave your hands, or you could be charged with statue-tory rape. Oh man..
emeraldisle 30
Ha! One of these days I hope I can come up with a good pun.
QueenQuay77 10
Yea that was a good one.
shanemaximo 7
Even the driest sense of humor can't repel a pun of this magnitude!!
wlddog 14
Doesn't matter had sex.
ILoveEggnog 7
I would highly recommend looking into getting some corrective lenses.
Pentium_4 27
props to the person who made it. must have been a damn realistic statue
EvilTeddysRock 2
I wonder how long it took you to realize this X)
Grimmerie 31
What a stony response!
GhettoXmuffin 7
I'm sorry. But that was just awful.
IOmnomHard 10
I thought it was decent as far as statue puns go.
fmlallthetyme 23
Same. I thought it was a rock solid pun.
emeraldisle 30
It's time for a trip to the eye doctor for you OP.