Today, my parents held a big family dinner at our house. Being the only underage person there, I had to sit there while everyone got progressively drunker and started commenting on how eerily similar I look to Shamu the whale. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out my friends call me 'Shamu the whale' behind my back. FML
Today, my family went to Seaworld. When we got there, my dad sarcastically told me not to get lost, because I might get mistaken for Shamu. FML
Today, I had a family get-together for my birthday. I got to watch all my family members get piss-drunk and argue over who's having the worst time. FML
Today, my whole family was sitting in the kitchen. My sister was stoned and passed out in our dog's bed. My dad was drunk, yelling, "Who's your daddy?" at his plate of barbecued meat, and my mom just sat there with that, "What the hell happened to my life?" look on her face. FML
Today, I took my boyfriend to a family dinner. It went well, until my dad got drunk and started telling everyone about how "midgets" are assholes and are ruining America. FML
Today, I overheard my mum tell my sister that she should make me a bridesmaid at her wedding. My sister scoffed, "She looks like Shamu, mum. I can't have THAT in my wedding pics." followed by laughter and my mum saying, "Touché." FML
Today, I ordered a beer with my parents at dinner. The waitress said, "Oh, happy 22nd birthday." My parents eyes got really big, and they started to blush. They'd forgotten it was my birthday. FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. His father was completely wasted, his mom was high, and his 11-year-old sister was talking about her favorite alcoholic drinks at the dinner table. FML
Today, my dad got drunk at a party and flashed me and my friends. FML
Today, at dinner, I accidentally let it slip that I'd taken a small sip of alcohol a few years ago and hated it. My extremely strict parents are now trying to get me into rehab. FML
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Top comments
bigtaytay 13
You should have dumped water all over them and told them they were in the splash zone
XxDevilxXGt 26
I think it's really sad that people see "underage drinking" as this horrible thing. Guess what, drinking to get drunk in general is bad whether you're 16, 21, or 40, and THAT's what's wrong with people. And it doesn't do any harm to have a drink with family, that's just silly. With your logic, I hope YOU never have kids.
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Comments (82)
bigtaytay 13
You should have dumped water all over them and told them they were in the splash zone
BntyHntrSeattle 30
Then said, "**** you humans with your fermented potatoes, I am NOT swimming through that hoop."
rg350dx 29
Threaten to kill someone, because shamu did that shit and didn't goto jail.
iBanana 17
Shamu did kill his/her trainer. I agree with above, jumping through hoops and being fed shitty sardines would make me awfully angry.
mariepastyglue 30
It sucks so bad being the only sober person in a room full of drunktards!! sorry for you OP next time sneak a sip or two, just to be on a more equal level well that is if you are at least over or 18...
Mobyman30 9
Should have filled your mouth up full of water, smashed your cheeks together so that water sprayed everywhere and politely said.. "Excuse my blowhole"
Treveyon56 14
So you're encouraging underage drinking? See that's is what's wrong with people. I honestly hope you never have kids.
XxDevilxXGt 26
I think it's really sad that people see "underage drinking" as this horrible thing. Guess what, drinking to get drunk in general is bad whether you're 16, 21, or 40, and THAT's what's wrong with people. And it doesn't do any harm to have a drink with family, that's just silly. With your logic, I hope YOU never have kids.
furbyface711 9
That's extremely tasteless. The girl who died was a co-worker of mine.
hcollins1 18
If OP does resemble Shamu, she should take advantage of it and become famous and throw it in her families face!
furbyface711 9
That's extremely tasteless. The girl who died was a coworker. She wasn't "killed", it was a freak accident.
FreakyMySlinky 7
Love the HU pic #1
dstamm2 10
That's what I do idk why this comment has so many dislikes
goingsolo211 8
Whale shoot!
PterodactylMan 23
Didnt sea that coming
evan_7899 28
This would have been a real scenario if OPs family had been japanese
raddybear 11
Shamu for say that joke
TheJordanBryant 11
Are you shore you know what you're talking about?
ILoveMyArm 15
I don't understand anyfin in this thread, water you all on about? I hope you all are squidding around. Sorry OP, family members can reely be some son of a beaches. Whale that is all I got.
peacheso 31
Don't let it get to you OP. I'm sure you are an awesome person.
jkmartinjk 16
Is drunker a word? Because I'm getting autocorrected on it.
rabidpeach 5
but how can you be certain? what are your sources.??
UNLUCKYyY1037 26
Anythings a word when your 15 shots in.
jkmartinjk 16
^True. Which makes me think OP is also drunk.
mld4657 28
Was the a black tie event. And you should of joined them they wouldn't of noticed if they were that drunk
blakesinthelake 11
Well OP said it was at their house so maybe they could've just left and gone to their room
Royalistic 8
Start doing tricks
BrookieAnn 19
Step one: take the drunken peoples wallets haha
TylerBurden 21
Shamo uses splash! It was very effective!
TylerBurden 21
My comment was a direct response to #1. Don't know why it's down here.
bigtaytay 13
I appreciated it
TylerBurden 21
And I thumbed you up for making me laugh. You are welcome.
BntyHntrSeattle 30
Such nice people :)
webbface 25
#6, ftw! You were my favorite!
Dodge4x4Ram 46
Your a dork :-)
alwayswinning123 7
They must have been really wasted..
cmoney1992 9
Not even drunk people can hold back true feelings... Sorry, OP
KingReppin956 15
"Not even"? Umm i think drunk people are the most honest
XxcaitanatorXx 12
dont worry there only drunk they will wake up and forget about every thing about it