Today, while on the job as a cop, I was breaking up a loud house party. We were just doing one final check of the house, we walked into the bathroom to find a kid furiously wanking in the bath. This isn't the first time I've seen something like this. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I caught my coworker masturbating in the bathroom. This was during her shift, while I was mopping the bathroom floors. FML
Today, at college, I walked in on some kid jerking off in front of the bathroom sink. This place never ceases to amaze and disgust me. FML
Today, I'd just finished cleaning the bathrooms at work when I saw a young boy go in. Of course, I thought nothing of it until I had to use the bathroom myself ten minutes later. The kid had taken a shit and missed the toilet completely. FML
Today, while in a public restroom, a man entered the stall next to me and began vigorously wanking. He finished quickly, but as he was leaving he peeped in at me through the crack in the stall door. FML
Today, I had to escort some dumbass teenager from Home Depot after I found him masturbating in one of the model washrooms. FML
Today, I walked in on my brother masturbating. In the living room. For the second time. FML
Today, I was taking a dump in a public restroom. Minding my own business, I heard somebody go into an adjacent stall. It was dead silent and I don't think he knew I was in there. I thought I heard him scratching his arm or something. I was wrong. He was jacking off. I had to listen to it all. FML
Today, I was in the restroom at work, snickering at some funny stories on my phone while I took a dump. Little did I know that the asshole in the next stall would report me to our boss, claiming he'd heard weird noises, then looked over the divider and witnessed me jacking off to porn. FML
Today, while looking at a house to buy, I opened a bathroom door. There was a naked man on the toilet. FML
Today, I walked in on my husband masturbating into the kitchen sink. FML
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Top comments
hardcorepunk87 18
"Put your hands where we can see them!! Wait! No! Put them back! Put them back!"
rainbowsRlove 15
sir put the weapon down
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Comments (55)
jrapp 8
Dirty cops
MoxleyCrue 17
YDI for being a cop.
somelildude 14
Cops uncensored?
tasteelingus 1
Maybe the kid thought he was about to go to jail, so he wanted to get one more wank in before the only sexual activity he'd get would be when he dropped the soap in the shower?
Dominus101 20
Ah The joys of being a Cop
im_a_black_guy 10
I feel like this is something that would happen to Jim Levinstine, from American pie. Had jims dad would give the kid a talk about sex
izntdan 14
As an American police officer i can confirm that this happens here all the time.
lostinareverie 21
Thankfully he didn't "shoot" at you.
Ipsum629 13
he was squanching
Ervinator35 25
"furiously wanking" ?? Oh I'm sorry you had to see that, OP. Even more so you've seen more than one situation like this...