Intimacy: Today, while in a public restroom, a man entered the stall next...

By ThoroughlyCreepedOut - United States

Today, while in a public restroom, a man entered the stall next to me and began vigorously wanking. He finished quickly, but as he was leaving he peeped in at me through the crack in the stall door. FML

I agree, your life sucks

26138

You deserved it

2221

Favorite

Intimacy

Triage

Zoomed out

Pleased to meet you

By State

Today, my best friend asked me to be the best man at his wedding. I had to decline because the bride's family has deep prison gang ties and I'm a correctional officer. FML

I agree, your life sucks

7227

You deserved it

537

Favorite

By kirrby - United States

Today, I tried to break up with my girlfriend because I feel unappreciated. She fell asleep while I was attempting this. FML

I agree, your life sucks

35853

You deserved it

4516

Favorite

By Anonymous - 28/5/2020 02:00

Looks aren't everything

Today, I was watching "My 600-lb Life". Most of the people on the show are married or in relationships. I cant even find a relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1186

You deserved it

274

Favorite

By jayc80 - Bermuda

Today, my boss scheduled a staff breakfast at a swanky new restaurant for all the hard work we've been doing. The dining area is on the roof, and the building has no elevator. I've been in a wheelchair for 11 years. When I brought this to my boss's attention, he said it wasn't his problem. FML

I agree, your life sucks

52939

You deserved it

3287

Favorite

By Anonymous - 14/8/2020 20:03

Minefield

Today, my cat pissed on my bed, so I had to change the sheets. Just as I got out of bed and take my first step, I stepped in my cat's poop as well and slipped, spraining my ankle. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1340

You deserved it

344

Favorite

By takeiteasy - France

Today, my wife and I went to a wedding. At one in the morning, when the cheese was being served, we were starting to fall asleep at the table, so we went to our car to take a short nap. When we woke up it was 5am, and the party was over. FML

I agree, your life sucks

9636

You deserved it

34416

Favorite

By CarrieBerrie - 14/8/2020 17:01

Fire in the hole!

Today, after being woken up with the intense urge to go to the bathroom, and having gone to the bathroom three times in the last hour, I finally realized I took two laxatives instead of two Midol. My ass is on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1229

You deserved it

482

Favorite

By Charley

Today, I was teaching a new student their first ever piano lesson, hoping that they would sign up for more lessons. Thirty minutes had gone by and after the 5th time of me saying what a talented, sweet little girl she was, the mother told me it was in fact a boy. They didn't sign up. FML

I agree, your life sucks

9804

You deserved it

2997

Favorite

By thanatophobia - France

Today, my deranged co-worker sent me a text message containing a picture that she just took of her uncle. It was his funeral. FML

I agree, your life sucks

24929

You deserved it

2001

Favorite

By Tom - United Kingdom

Today, I crawled into bed at 2 in the morning. At 6 am, the telephone rang, waking me up. It was a wrong number. FML

I agree, your life sucks

42805

You deserved it

13335

Favorite

By ohseven6421 - United States

Today, I decided to drive my mothers Bentley. She is out of town and told me not to go near the car. Being 17, I didn't listen. As I was backing out the driveway, I was hit by an SUV, seriously damaging my moms car. Who was driving the SUV? My mom, coming home early. FML

I agree, your life sucks

12079

You deserved it

78793

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, while taking a shower, a spider fell from the ceiling onto my foot. I took down my shower head to wash it down the drain, and in the process, got soap in my eye and rammed my head into the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks

22571

You deserved it

8299

Favorite

By Bambusmaster

Sobering.

Today, I'm on vacation with my best friends. We went to a club and I drunk texted my girlfriend of 1 year about how nice everything is and how much I miss her. She responded by breaking up with me because she likes me more as a friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2746

You deserved it

208

Favorite

By sad - Canada

Today, I left my book on the plane after I'd finished reading it. The flight attendant thought I'd forgotten it, so he chased me through the airport, past security, past customs, and past baggage claims. I didn't have the heart to tell him I left it on purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks

10038

You deserved it

45822

Favorite

By bman - Australia - Sydney

Today, I caught myself staring at my grandmother's cleavage. FML

I agree, your life sucks

11904

You deserved it

50034

Favorite

By ouch - United States

Today, my mom got drunk and punched me in the nose, then yelled at me for bleeding on the carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks

61033

You deserved it

4747

Favorite

By notjustfat - United States

Today, my boyfriend said he was no longer sexually attracted to me. He then followed that with, "But don't worry, it's not because you're fat." FML

I agree, your life sucks

22549

You deserved it

2306

Favorite

By RyanSmithN - United States

Today, I used a public bathroom and set my motorcycle helmet on the sink while I used the urinal. The helmet rolled into the sink, under the faucet and set off the motion detector, soaking the inside. I drove 15 miles home in 30 degree weather with a wet helmet. FML

I agree, your life sucks

26161

You deserved it

9181

Favorite

By Jimbo - United States

Today, I came home on leave after a seven month deployment in the middle of the ocean for the Navy. My entire region got hit by the worst flood in recorded history. I need a speedboat to go to the Quick-e-mart. FML

I agree, your life sucks

36244

You deserved it

2784

Favorite

By agh marriage - Australia - Albany Creek

Today, I was placed firmly in the friend-zone. By my wife. We've been married 10 years. She doesn't want a divorce, she says it'd be too "time-consuming." FML

I agree, your life sucks

33568

You deserved it

2488

Favorite

By "BunnysKitty" - United States - Columbia City

Today, I wanted to pack my lunch with some of my homemade meatloaf leftover from last night's dinner, but I couldn't find it anywhere in my fridge. Later in the evening, my boyfriend's parents invited us over for dinner. They served meatloaf. The meatloaf they stole from my fridge last night when they visited. FML

I agree, your life sucks

5695

You deserved it

338

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out that the love of my life, who I've been going out with for two weeks only, asked me out because he lost a bet. Apparently I'm the punishment for not being able to eat 10 hot dogs. FML

I agree, your life sucks

56070

You deserved it

12799

Favorite

By msnewyearseve - United States

Today, I woke up after a long night of partying. When I went to wash off my face, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. My missing tooth was almost enough to make me overlook my black eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks

12826

You deserved it

32996

Favorite

By toto13660

Today, at the beach, a seagull conveyed its opinion of my cigarette by taking a dump on it, putting it out. Seems they have anti-tobacco sniper seagulls now. FML

I agree, your life sucks

7313

You deserved it

12997

Favorite

By theflasher - United Kingdom - Bristol

Today, a woman who works in the clinic across the road told me that my glass isn't frosted enough and she and all her patients can see me when I shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks

27442

You deserved it

3403

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I bought a new, expensive face moisturizer. However, it smells like poop. I paid $20 dollars to make my face smell like shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks

13559

You deserved it

31293

Favorite

By Anonymous - Portugal - Sintra

Today, while on the bus, an elderly man fell asleep on my shoulder. He looked sweet, so I didn't push him off. A few minutes later, the bus jolted and his head slipped down into my breasts. I'm pretty sure you don't smile like that when you're really asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks

42928

You deserved it

7260

Favorite

By HK - United Kingdom - Haywards Heath

Today, my boyfriend got mad at me because I refused to keep him company while he took a shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks

25909

You deserved it

3803

Favorite

By Sarah - United States

Today, I finally quit the job that I've been complaining about. Before I could tell my husband, he informed me that he had been laid off, and was thankful we still had my income. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28564

You deserved it

17189

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States - Valley Stream

Today, my roommate reached a whole new level of laziness: I caught him casually peeing into an empty beer bottle while laying in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks

18444

You deserved it

1354

Favorite

By sneezeattack - United States - Aurora

Today, my boyfriend got so happy when he thought he'd finally given me an orgasm. I was covering an urge to sneeze. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30875

You deserved it

4271

Favorite

By LameChef - Poland

Today, after years of providing daily various home-made colourful meals for three kids and a husband, I was asked to "cook something cool, like instant hamburgers, not that lame healthy shit". FML

I agree, your life sucks

30029

You deserved it

4986

Favorite

By Trooper - United Kingdom - Caterham

Today, I saw the postman approach my house through the window, and my immediate reaction was to drop to the floor in fear. FML

I agree, your life sucks

10805

You deserved it

2282

Favorite

By LA - United States

Today, at physical therapy, the girl next to me had a blue armband. I said, "Hey, sweet iPod". She said, "Actually, I have diabetes." FML

I agree, your life sucks

13326

You deserved it

41522

Favorite

By lmao4eva93 - United States

Today, I discovered my former boss from the job I quit 3 months is now my boss at my new job. He was the reason I quit my old job. FML

I agree, your life sucks

48893

You deserved it

3436

Favorite

By LonelyThisChristmas - United Kingdom - Birmingham

Today, my step-mum told me that the Christmas dinner she is cooking tomorrow will cost £25 a head. I laughed because I thought she was joking. She wasn't. Now I'm spending Christmas alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks

7910

You deserved it

625

Favorite

By fishoutofwater - United States - Radcliff

Today, in an attempt to broaden my horizons in another sport besides swimming, I succeeded in getting a frisbee spiked into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks

16829

You deserved it

1529

Favorite

By baconlady - United States

Today, I bought some perfume that I thought smelled absolutely amazing. Later, my boyfriend walked in, sniffed, and said, "What smells like bacon?" The bottle cost $83. They won't take a refund. FML

I agree, your life sucks

20660

You deserved it

9186

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to the pet store to get mice for my mom's snakes. While checking out, the guy working behind the register asked what kind of snakes I had. I told him they were my mom's and he mentioned this crazy woman that talks to her snakes. That's my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks

55649

You deserved it

4675

Favorite

By CatLady - United States - San Francisco

Today, I brought up the subject of marriage with my boyfriend. His response was to shoot me with a nerf gun and laugh. FML

I agree, your life sucks

48121

You deserved it

9620

Favorite

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

By jf7609 | 0

#920955 - Sunday 7 March 2010 9:12

oh my god, as if the wanking wasn't creepy enough...

By fournineteen | 0

#920976 - Sunday 7 March 2010 9:15

I thought that only happened in airports?!

COMMENTS

By ZombieBunnies | 0

#920946 - Sunday 7 March 2010 9:10

yay for wankers!!

Terwilliger | 0

#921133 - Sunday 7 March 2010 9:49

WHAAAT THE FUUCKK

chromeLegend | 0

#921196 - Sunday 7 March 2010 10:13

Total WTF situation.

blitzen123 | 0

#921218 - Sunday 7 March 2010 10:22

That is so creepy! x.x

xnty | 0

#921284 - Sunday 7 March 2010 11:05

my friend works in security at lord

ey3seecold | 0

#921339 - Sunday 7 March 2010 12:04

u both sighed with releif at the end so wtf!!!

KyleSays1 | 0

#921541 - Sunday 7 March 2010 14:21

@blitzen123, ur hot :D

JackRocksSoSuckI | 0

#921618 - Sunday 7 March 2010 14:58

GAY SHIT

pepper3434 | 0

#921730 - Sunday 7 March 2010 15:46

Why do people feel the need to do this in an extremely public place?

mcicycool | 0

#921739 - Sunday 7 March 2010 15:49

sum ppl get off at public places. I think they are called exhibitionists..

Wolfwood187 | 0

#923809 - Monday 8 March 2010 3:49

LoL, I laughed for a few minutes on this one. That's terribly messed up haha.

drewu261 | 0

#927658 - Tuesday 9 March 2010 5:10

that was me ;)

infernofalcon | 0

#928878 - Tuesday 9 March 2010 15:48

Hope he suffers from Wanker's cramp, the most deadly of all British diseases.

MattCole | 0

#968504 - Friday 26 March 2010 10:18

That happened to me once. the guy was peering into my stall while he was doing it. he left when I threatened to kick his ass, cut his dick off, and make him eat it

yumsters | 0

#970337 - Monday 29 March 2010 5:22

^^^^^ I would to ^^^^^

rwac07 | 0

#977682 - Sunday 11 April 2010 8:14

wanking, become a fan on facebook.

bakingstuff | 0

#1092188 - Thursday 15 July 2010 4:36

91 watches"yu gi oh abrigded"

bakingstuff | 0

#1092190 - Thursday 15 July 2010 4:36

91 watches"yu gi oh abrigded"

bakingstuff | 0

#1092193 - Thursday 15 July 2010 4:36

91 watches"yu gi oh abrigded"

trevishere | 7

#2879333 - Wednesday 13 July 2011 3:54

This will most likely be thumbed down;; you should've started masturbating to see what did.

lolmigosh | 15

#3906524 - Thursday 19 January 2012 2:23

Gay?

By jf7609 | 0

#920955 - Sunday 7 March 2010 9:12

oh my god, as if the wanking wasn't creepy enough...

CHUCKBARTOWSKl | 0

#921912 - Sunday 7 March 2010 16:32

wat is wanking ?

kaileebug | 0

#921973 - Sunday 7 March 2010 17:00

it's what big boys do when they get bored. simple and clean explanation.

ALegitNinja | 0

#922055 - Sunday 7 March 2010 17:33

Well, when a big boy and his right hand love each other VERY much....

demonsoldier31 | 0

#922103 - Sunday 7 March 2010 17:55

lmfao WIN!!!

yourlifesfucked | 0

#922980 - Sunday 7 March 2010 23:24

wanking is what brits call jacking off

DeeBizz | 0

#923224 - Monday 8 March 2010 0:39

@60 , I'm left-handed

mattthew | 0

#923291 - Monday 8 March 2010 1:08

well... that sucks for you

depressedgamer | 0

#923602 - Monday 8 March 2010 2:39

alegitninja= WIN

Zills | 0

#924450 - Monday 8 March 2010 7:41

I'm left handed too, right handed high five.

MattCole | 0

#924849 - Monday 8 March 2010 11:46

It's a term for masturbation used by non-American English speakers. Americans just don't use the word "wank" in our vocabulary.

nikkibihm | 0

#2604947 - Thursday 2 June 2011 10:31

haha agreed !

hunterluv1 | 20

#4536463 - Thursday 7 June 2012 16:39

87- Yet OP Is from America? And so am I and I knew what it was? ...

By shuuguuy | 0

#920962 - Sunday 7 March 2010 9:12

Go up to him and be like I saw you looking at my package, if you liked it so much give me a 20 and get another hunny and wink at him

Cristaderzi | 0

#921227 - Sunday 7 March 2010 10:24

Better yet beat the faggots ass!!

neonblue120 | 6

#921277 - Sunday 7 March 2010 10:58

yeah..... if he's not 6"8" 300lbs

totally kick his ass.....if he isn't armed

throw him a beat down....if he isn't your dad.

ladiesman14 | 0

#924432 - Monday 8 March 2010 7:25

what does wanking mean in english ? isnt that a song by 50 cent ? so he was being a gangsta the stall next to you ? were you at a car dealership and did you buy anything.