Today, while I was in the shower, I noticed a short, black hair on my loofah. I ignored it and lathered up my entire body with it. When I put it back down, a roach crawled out of it. What I thought was a black hair was in fact its antenna. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, despite years of paranoid checking, I forgot to check my towel for spiders after my shower. Two crawled onto me, and I'm pretty sure there's one somewhere in my hair. FML
Today, it took a whole half hour of scratching my head before I realized with horror that the weird tickling sensation I'd been feeling was actually a spider crawling around in my hair. FML
Today, I was in the shower and had just finished washing my face. When I put the soap down I noticed a curly, black hair stuck to it. I'm blond. The only other person who uses that bathroom is my uncle. I just rubbed my uncle's pubic hair all over my face. FML
Today, I saw a big, black spider on the floor of my bathroom. I promptly jumped up on the toilet seat, slipped off, and slammed my head against the wall. The best part? It was a tuft of my hair. FML
Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML
Today, after a few days of getting what seemed like an odd, scattered rash every time I showered, I finally figured out the problem. It turns out I wasn't just allergic to all the different soap I tried. Apparently a family of very angry spiders have decided to make my loofah their new home. FML
Today, I found the same spider which I had let live yesterday hidden in my bath towel. I didn't find it until it was smeared on my face. FML
Today, while showering at my boyfriend's house early this morning, I saw a huge black spider on the wall. I'm allergic to spiders, so in my disorientation I ran out of the shower screaming, slipped, sprained my wrist, and bruised my tailbone. Turns out the spider was a clump of hair. My hair. FML
Today, I was expecting lizards, spiders, and weird local insects in my hotel room. What I got was a cockroach on my toothbrush. A very tiny cockroach. FML
Today, I have been finding long black hairs all over my bathroom. My hair is short and blonde, and I live alone. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
MiddleChild08 0
Look at it this way...at least it was clean cockroach...
Whats_Love09 0
Im hoping you showered... again. Without the roach this time.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (129)
freepwnyride 0
Today, I was hanging out in my loofa when some asshole picked me up and rubbed me all over his naked body. FML
aaaaa2p 0
Amazing.
ohwoahemilyy 0
I actually laughed out loud to this, not the real FML. :)
unlucky93_fml 0
its really annoying all these fml's are being repeated. (roaches, pens, etc)
Mountaineerman 0
The main problem is that you're a guy using a loofa.
Udyjay 1
...I really don't see a problem with a guy using a loofa. You people need to get over yourselves. and ew, OP. That... sucks.
antonioohama 0
Euch. At least you were taking a shower when it happened, so you could just wash it right off.
iheyman 0
YDI how the hell do you get roaches In the shower?!?!
KelsieKatt 0
Wow. Seriously people. Grow up. Who cares if a guy is using a loofa? At least they're actually cleaning themselves properly. I don't care how "manly" being a dirty slob is, I wouldn't date someone who can't clean themselves properly. What's next, is using Conditioner evil? Shall we pull soap from the list as well? Heck, know what? Just forget the whole thing. Why even bother washing yourself, right? Honestly, I'm more surprised by the fact that he didn't remove the hair from it. Kinda slobbish if you ask me. As for why a roach might wind up in someone's shower. Roaches are quite fond of warm, humid places... so it's not surprising one might decide to hide in the shower. No matter how thorough you are, they still manage to get through sometimes, so "cleanliness" isn't going to outright prevent that, however, seeing as how this person leaves dirty hairs in their loofa, it's possible they could have a messy house.
RandomCommenter 0
UGH! Gross. That sucks.
Zim4 0
ydi for using a loofa... or saying loofa... or really just having anything to do with a loofa...
zfchatroulette 24
What possible reason could you have for saying that, 117
zebrapattern 6
why would you ignore a short black hair on your loofa in the first place? you're gross.