Today, while I was in the shower, I noticed a short, black hair on my loofah. I ignored it and lathered up my entire body with it. When I put it back down, a roach crawled out of it. What I thought was a black hair was in fact its antenna. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, despite years of paranoid checking, I forgot to check my towel for spiders after my shower. Two crawled onto me, and I'm pretty sure there's one somewhere in my hair. FML
Today, it took a whole half hour of scratching my head before I realized with horror that the weird tickling sensation I'd been feeling was actually a spider crawling around in my hair. FML
Today, I was in the shower and had just finished washing my face. When I put the soap down I noticed a curly, black hair stuck to it. I'm blond. The only other person who uses that bathroom is my uncle. I just rubbed my uncle's pubic hair all over my face. FML
Today, I saw a big, black spider on the floor of my bathroom. I promptly jumped up on the toilet seat, slipped off, and slammed my head against the wall. The best part? It was a tuft of my hair. FML
Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML
Today, after a few days of getting what seemed like an odd, scattered rash every time I showered, I finally figured out the problem. It turns out I wasn't just allergic to all the different soap I tried. Apparently a family of very angry spiders have decided to make my loofah their new home. FML
Today, I found the same spider which I had let live yesterday hidden in my bath towel. I didn't find it until it was smeared on my face. FML
Today, while showering at my boyfriend's house early this morning, I saw a huge black spider on the wall. I'm allergic to spiders, so in my disorientation I ran out of the shower screaming, slipped, sprained my wrist, and bruised my tailbone. Turns out the spider was a clump of hair. My hair. FML
Today, I was expecting lizards, spiders, and weird local insects in my hotel room. What I got was a cockroach on my toothbrush. A very tiny cockroach. FML
Today, I have been finding long black hairs all over my bathroom. My hair is short and blonde, and I live alone. FML
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Top comments
MiddleChild08 0
Look at it this way...at least it was clean cockroach...
Whats_Love09 0
Im hoping you showered... again. Without the roach this time.
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Comments (129)
bibbit 0
YDI for using a loofah
oh_dee 0
Nah, I think I have the cleanest house in the history of clean houses and I STILL get the occasional roach in my basement...where there's humidity and if you have neighbors it's pretty much unavoidable. But how did you not see something darkish in your loofa? I don't really get it...and wouldn't you feel it while lathering up? You know, something hard that's not supposed to be there? I don't know.....but in any case I would be scarred for life if I were you.
Aiken_ 0
Oh my lizard. Ewww...
HaveNoShame 3
That's pretty traumatizing, but at least you can console yourself that the roach had a much weirder experience than you.
Raecheezy 0
Yeah, f the roaches life :|
diet_otaku 0
this happened to me once, only instead of a little black roach it was a big waterbug, and instead of its antenna poking out, it shed its skin inside the loofa and dropped to the tub floor all white and semi-transparent. fortunately i had not used the loofa yet. D:
Pandasaur 0
That literally made me shiver more than the FML did. D: Worst mental image ever.
JukeboxBunny 0
Oh my ******* god. I think I'm going to have nightmares about that.
gtdoll 0
ohmygawd. I WONT be able to shower tonight without mental images of clear bugs.
Amanyyyyyy 29
NOPE NOPE NOPE
plexico 4
Let me get this straight: you were OK with lathering your whole body with a loofah that had a stray pubic hair sticking out of it. (Even if you are sure you lathered your whole body with your OWN pube, yuck!) But you freak out when it turns out that innocent strand of man-floss turns out to be a roach antenna? And you are man that uses a loofah?
ScaryyMary 14
EXACTLY what I was thinking.
Witchcraft_fml 5
Yeah, that's what I was thinking. :/ This can't be an FML for the OP if he was willing to wash with a pube, because in my opinion a roach isn't much worse. Or possibly it was the bugs in his pubes that bred the roach in his loofah?
DameGreyWulf 1
48 That made me misinterpret and think he did that roach a certain favor...
Witchcraft_fml 5
#92, even better. I wouldn't doubt it, in fact.
fmh123 0
man if that happen to me, I would probably freak out, slip, and bang my head on something
UGFTW 0
My first thought was pubes
jcorbs 0
same
aback 5
Mmm...roachilicious.
LadyMia 0
that's nasty lol