Miscellaneous: Today, while I was eating, my younger sister came over and sat...

By ohhhgross - 26/10/2009 18:32 - Singapore

Today, while I was eating, my younger sister came over and sat beside me. She started clipping her toenails. Disgusted by it, I turned and opened my mouth to tell her to move somewhere else, just as one flew inside my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 263

You deserved it 5 339

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By argfarblewarblearble - 07/08/2015 13:49 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I was laying on the couch, listening to music. I guess my brother noticed that I was yawning a lot, because when I opened my mouth and yawned again, he dropped one of his rancid toenail clippings into my mouth, then broke into hysterical laughter at my freaking out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 888

You deserved it 2 328

Masterchef 2020

By Anonymous - 26/11/2020 18:58 - United States - Maryville

Today, I was eating some cake that my roommate's girlfriend brought by for us. I felt something weird in my mouth, so I stopped chewing to grab it. It was a fingernail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 966

You deserved it 61

Revenge

By Natasha - 20/02/2021 21:30

Today, because I wouldn’t let my little sister have any more cookies, she snuck into my room while I was sleeping and superglued my lips together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 077

You deserved it 116

By Silent - 18/10/2018 17:30

Today, at the orthodontist, the nurse was checking my teeth. She asked me a question while her finger was in my mouth, and when I stupidly tried to reply, I bit her finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 131

You deserved it 439

By sleepysophie - 19/10/2013 15:04 - United States - Helena

Today, I slept over at my friend's house. Her dad made breakfast for us. While fixing a plate, my friend said, "Careful, my dad clips his nails in the kitchen." She said it with a sarcastic, joking tone, and laughed afterwards. While eating, I found a toenail in my food. Her response? "I told you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 599

You deserved it 5 561

Weird awakening

By Anonymous - 19/03/2023 04:00

Today, I woke up to my sister sucking my toes because she was drunk, wanted to borrow one of my toe rings but couldn’t get it off, and thought spit would lubricate it off with her tongue. She doesn’t even live here, it’s my house. She used her spare key to get in at 1 a.m. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 124

You deserved it 115

Spice

By Anonymous - 07/04/2021 04:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I dropped some food on the floor and picked it back up, took a bite, and quickly realised it had toenail cuttings in it. I never cut my toenails in my dining room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 439

You deserved it 956

By Anonymous - 14/04/2011 17:35 - United States

Today, I made my young niece lunch. After she claimed to have eaten it all, she wanted to go out and play. I was putting my shoes on when I found part of the sandwich I made her stuffed in my shoe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 418

You deserved it 4 885

By ginya - 07/06/2016 01:58 - United States - Bedford

Today, my sister asked me to let her dog out of the kennel when I got home. I did only to have the little beast bite me. She then ate the entire content of the cat's litter box, which she couldn't keep down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 468

You deserved it 1 081

By lizzard0416 - 30/11/2012 03:00 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I was going to give my baby daughter an empty Pringles tin to play with on the floor. I saw some crumbs at the bottom, so I emptied the can in my mouth before I gave it to her. I crunched hard and spat them out, realizing my boyfriend had just cut his toenails into the can. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 964

You deserved it 9 982

LadyKaya 0

Monday 26 October 2009 23:14

I hate when people find it appropriate to groom themselves next to where I'm eating...

Nakedsquirrel 5

Monday 26 October 2009 23:29

At least she wasn't shaving her pubes, right?

Comments

freedoggy77 0

Monday 26 October 2009 22:48

gross

xEmGai 0

Monday 26 October 2009 23:00

Hmm, like the hobo one O___O!

metakingt 0

Tuesday 27 October 2009 0:54

Would have been more interesting if you were actually eating your sister =/.

marz88 0

Tuesday 27 October 2009 6:38

Haha I swear I read this as "I was eating my younger sister". I might need some serious help >.< lol

Rhii_280 0

Tuesday 27 October 2009 12:30

so did i, so did i ^_^

cookiepenguin 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 2:26

explosive toenail clipping

awks 0

Sunday 21 March 2010 4:36

that's what I was thinking to, the hobo one!

jackballman 0

Monday 8 November 2010 10:08

something like that happened to me. i was talking and my friend randomly spit a spitball right in my mouth.

Intoxicunt 5

Monday 26 October 2009 22:49

You just lost the game.

allmidnighteyes 10

Monday 26 October 2009 22:52

Dammit, Savannah... OP - How are you positioned to eat in a way that her clipped toenails fly in your mouth? Are you laying on the floor under her feet or something?

yeahsurre 0

Monday 26 October 2009 22:54

oh #1... fail.

Monado 0

Monday 26 October 2009 22:57

I guess we both fail then. One at the puns, and one at replying.

fakepolice 0

Monday 26 October 2009 22:55

please pass the toe jam... *cough* thank you, I think

Baal952 0

Monday 26 October 2009 23:02

I think this was a repost because I remember seeing this before

adelaide_evening 0

Monday 26 October 2009 23:57

Except the last one was better because, if I remember correctly, it was homeless man's toenail who the poster was riding next to on the subway or something.

LadyKaya 0

Monday 26 October 2009 23:14

I hate when people find it appropriate to groom themselves next to where I'm eating...

Einstein714 0

Monday 26 October 2009 23:14

was her foot on the table? WTF???

Nakedsquirrel 5

Monday 26 October 2009 23:29

At least she wasn't shaving her pubes, right?

perdix 29

Monday 26 October 2009 23:31

I'll bet her toenail was more nutritious than the junk food you were going to put in your mouth. Certainly, it would be crunchier. You can't beat toenails for crunch.