Animals: Today, while feeding my neighbour's cats, I mistakenly switched...

By fuckshitcockwaffle - 31/05/2013 14:59 - Australia - Bayswater

Today, while feeding my neighbour's cats, I mistakenly switched up their foods. One has medicated food that causes drowsiness. The healthy cat got knocked out like a log. I panicked, laid him out by the bed, and spilled milk around his head to make it look "natural." I think I'm going to hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 514

You deserved it 37 568

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By ilovecharliesheen - 17/03/2015 07:14 - United States - Phoenix

Today, I accidentally ate a cat treat instead of a cinnamon-glazed pecan. I thought it must have been burnt by the way it tasted, so ate a few more before I figured out my mistake and spat them out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 609

You deserved it 14 265

By of course - 20/04/2019 12:00

Today, I woke up at 2 a.m. needing a drink. Not only did my cat wake everyone up when I tripped over him, but I also spilled a whole gallon of milk on myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 758

You deserved it 548

Keep the peace

By Anonymous - 02/10/2020 18:02 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, my girlfriend accidentally put rubbish in the neighbour's bin. Then the old lady took all the rubbish out and threw it on the floor. I came out and tried to calm the situation, but then my girlfriend ran downstairs and tipped her cat food and cat milk bowls over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 748

You deserved it 120

The gift

By Anonymous - 15/12/2023 14:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I turned over in my sleep and fell out of bed, face-first into a puddle of cold cat vomit that my cat had left for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 478

You deserved it 154

By Fykkhttdsetkkhvln - 26/04/2009 16:45 - United States

Today, I was snuggling with my neighbors four week old kitten while babysitting their kids. I fell asleep, rolled over, and woke up next to a dead kitten. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 789

You deserved it 58 150

By OldHabitsDieHard - 18/09/2013 14:53 - United States - Erie

Today, I was getting my cat some canned food. Out of habit I licked the spoon after I had emptied the can only to realize too late what I had done. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 716

You deserved it 18 748

By anonymous - 20/06/2012 14:09 - United Kingdom

Today, I was so out of it from a lack of sleep and an accidental antihistamine overdose, I tried to offer my cat a cup of tea, and actually got pissed off when he didn't reply. It took me a good five minutes to understand what just happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 132

You deserved it 6 602

By grosssss - 01/01/2010 13:03 - Australia

Today, while I was trying to get to sleep, I heard a strange noise coming from the bunk bed above mine. I looked up to see what it was and my cat vomited over the edge, onto my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 727

You deserved it 3 429

By crazycat - 13/05/2011 16:23 - Canada

Today, in the early hours of the morning, my cat started scratching at my legs. I got out of bed and he raced me to the stairs, tripping me. I fell all the way down and landed in cat poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 608

You deserved it 5 831

Wake up Boo

By Megan Snair - 01/09/2019 04:01

Today, my cat threw up on the floor while I was taking a nap. I woke up, still groggy from the nap, and walked over to the bathroom. Not only did I slip on the vomit, spreading it all over the floor and myself, I think I somehow broke a toe in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 559

You deserved it 198

Cartera 10

Friday 31 May 2013 19:07

Or you could do the right thing and explain what happened. Nice name though. Very original.

Pleonasm 35

Friday 31 May 2013 19:08

What a catastrophe (had to be done)

Comments

Ameel_fml 19

Friday 31 May 2013 19:30

Am I the only one confused by the spilled milk part? How would that make it "look natural"?

Quiet_one 22

Friday 31 May 2013 19:48

Obviously, it's because milk is the cat equivalent of alcohol in people. He was trying to make it look like the cat had gone on a bender and passed out, because as any cat owner knows, that happens quite often. This is also why young kittens are so unsteady on their feet- they ingest nothing but milk, and therefore are always drunk until they transition to solid food. SCIENCE.

hurley12 30

Friday 31 May 2013 19:37

You're a terrible person, just tell the truth!

Quiet_one 22

Friday 31 May 2013 19:41

I don't understand how OP thought the milk would make anything look "natural." The best explanation I can think of is that OP has somehow gotten through life believing milk is some kind of magical "cat booze" and that cats are capable of going into the fridge and getting it for themselves. Maybe he should lay off the cartoons for a while.

Ceejay1 13

Friday 31 May 2013 19:43

Wow ,I can't believe you staged a crime scene .

priest_of_war 10

Friday 31 May 2013 19:52

The perfect murder

Enslaved 36

Friday 31 May 2013 20:51

The movie "A Perfect Murder" was a modern remake of Alfred Hitchcock's film "Dial M for Murder". Same thing as "Cruel Intentions" vs "Dangerous Liaisons".