Animals: Today, while feeding my neighbour's cats, I mistakenly switched... - FML

By fuckshitcockwaffle - 31/05/2013 14:59 - Australia - Bayswater

Today, while feeding my neighbour's cats, I mistakenly switched up their foods. One has medicated food that causes drowsiness. The healthy cat got knocked out like a log. I panicked, laid him out by the bed, and spilled milk around his head to make it look "natural." I think I'm going to hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 514

You deserved it 37 568

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By ilovecharliesheen - 17/03/2015 07:14 - United States - Phoenix

Today, I accidentally ate a cat treat instead of a cinnamon-glazed pecan. I thought it must have been burnt by the way it tasted, so ate a few more before I figured out my mistake and spat them out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 609

You deserved it 14 265

By of course - 20/04/2019 12:00

Today, I woke up at 2 a.m. needing a drink. Not only did my cat wake everyone up when I tripped over him, but I also spilled a whole gallon of milk on myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 758

You deserved it 547

Keep the peace

By Anonymous - 02/10/2020 18:02 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, my girlfriend accidentally put rubbish in the neighbour's bin. Then the old lady took all the rubbish out and threw it on the floor. I came out and tried to calm the situation, but then my girlfriend ran downstairs and tipped her cat food and cat milk bowls over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 748

You deserved it 120

The gift

By Anonymous - 15/12/2023 14:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I turned over in my sleep and fell out of bed, face-first into a puddle of cold cat vomit that my cat had left for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 478

You deserved it 154

By Fykkhttdsetkkhvln - 26/04/2009 16:45 - United States

Today, I was snuggling with my neighbors four week old kitten while babysitting their kids. I fell asleep, rolled over, and woke up next to a dead kitten. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 789

You deserved it 58 150

By OldHabitsDieHard - 18/09/2013 14:53 - United States - Erie

Today, I was getting my cat some canned food. Out of habit I licked the spoon after I had emptied the can only to realize too late what I had done. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 716

You deserved it 18 748

By anonymous - 20/06/2012 14:09 - United Kingdom

Today, I was so out of it from a lack of sleep and an accidental antihistamine overdose, I tried to offer my cat a cup of tea, and actually got pissed off when he didn't reply. It took me a good five minutes to understand what just happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 132

You deserved it 6 602

By grosssss - 01/01/2010 13:03 - Australia

Today, while I was trying to get to sleep, I heard a strange noise coming from the bunk bed above mine. I looked up to see what it was and my cat vomited over the edge, onto my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 727

You deserved it 3 429

By crazycat - 13/05/2011 16:23 - Canada

Today, in the early hours of the morning, my cat started scratching at my legs. I got out of bed and he raced me to the stairs, tripping me. I fell all the way down and landed in cat poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 608

You deserved it 5 831

Wake up Boo

By Megan Snair - 01/09/2019 04:01

Today, my cat threw up on the floor while I was taking a nap. I woke up, still groggy from the nap, and walked over to the bathroom. Not only did I slip on the vomit, spreading it all over the floor and myself, I think I somehow broke a toe in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 559

You deserved it 198

Next

Top comments

Cartera 10

Friday 31 May 2013 19:07

Or you could do the right thing and explain what happened. Nice name though. Very original.

Pleonasm 35

Friday 31 May 2013 19:08

What a catastrophe (had to be done)

Comments

jlujan00_fml 9

Sunday 9 June 2013 5:53

One it's just a sleepy car who cares? You're not going to hell. And two why would spilling milk around him make it look natural?

MrBoredomioo 18

Tuesday 11 June 2013 11:31

"Oops"

ChuckNorris2 4

Monday 17 June 2013 12:05

Tell them what you did.

1karls1 8

Tuesday 21 July 2015 3:06

I'll see you there OP ;)

noamkitty 3

Saturday 25 July 2015 20:45

Dude you just hid your mistake by staging a kitty conspiracy cover up feel ashamed

emp221 8

Tuesday 29 March 2016 18:17

Just sleeping

Eleonore Hübner 5

Sunday 8 September 2019 3:36

Yes you are.

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The Top

Today, I was riding on the back of my dad's motorcycle. After a few minutes, the vibrations from the engine became way too much for me and I couldn't control myself. I had such an intense orgasm, sitting right behind my father, with my arms around his waist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 795

You deserved it 16 308

Today, I parked and noticed a car that was identical to mine across from me. I thought it was an amusing coincidence until I came back to find both cars trashed. At least the vandal realized their mistake and left a note saying, "You deserve it for having the same car as that cheater, asshole!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 409

You deserved it 2 826

The Top

Today, my girlfriend's ex punched me so hard in the face, I couldn't see straight. But I got up anyway. I lunged at him, and nailed him in the jaw. Turns out I'd in fact just knocked out my girlfriend the on-looker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 120

You deserved it 15 177

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I agree, your life sucks 3 074

You deserved it 152

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I agree, your life sucks 39 099

You deserved it 2 747

Today, the arts company I work for cancelled our 8 pm sold-out outdoor performance at 7:30 due to rain, and will have to reticket 550 patrons. I'm the only person in the office trained in ticketing. It stopped raining 10 minutes after we cancelled it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 870

You deserved it 2 768

Today, my baby daddy texted me after months of me being alone and pregnant, asking if we could hang out. I'm on bed rest, and almost due. FML

I agree, your life sucks 819

You deserved it 278

Today, I came out to my parents as lesbian. Surprisingly, they were OK with it… just as long as I still marry a dude, give them grandbabies, and keep the whole lesbian thing a deep, dark, shameful secret that we never talk about again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 659

You deserved it 173