Today, when my son woke up from his nap, he sleepily reached up. I picked him up and gave him a big hug, and he immediately pushed me away. He wasn't reaching for me, he was reaching for the bag of chips on the table next to me. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I finally got my fussy newborn back to sleep after the creaking of my chair woke her. I then crept two rooms over and opened a pack of chips, the crinkle of which woke her again. FML
Today, my 2-year-old son put his hand on my face, gave me a sweet kiss, and put his cheek against mine. Then he slapped me hard enough to leave a mark, laughed, and scrambled away. FML
Today, my six year old son came up to me with his arms spread and said, "I feel like a hug." I got really excited and hopeful because he is very anti-social and hates physical contact. As soon as I stood up to hug him he said "Feeling's gone" and walked away. FML
Today, my son took a nap quietly for the first time ever. As I went to wake him up, I realized why. A previously poop-filled diaper came flying at me when I opened the door. FML
Today, my boyfriend was reaching over to give me a hug for no reason. I said "Aww, You're sweet! I love you too!" He looked confused and said, "That's great, but I was reaching for the remote." FML
Today, I woke up to my 7 year old son angrily trying to smother me with a pillow. FML
Today, I made a sandwich. When I went to grab chips, my wife snatched it. I made a second sandwich. My son came in and stole the plate when I was grabbing a seltzer. I went to make a third sandwich. No more cold cuts. FML
Today, when I called my 2-year-old son over for a hug, he giggled and squealed as he ran over to me. He then stopped in front of me, punched me in the bollocks, and walked away quite happily whilst I was doubled over in pain. FML
Today, while eating with my kids at McDonalds, my son put his hand up and wanted me to give him a "high five." I went to give him a five, but he moved his hand at the last second and I ended up slapping him in the face. Now everyone there thinks I'm a child-beater. FML
Today, I leaned down to pick up my infant son from his highchair. He reached up and grabbed the first thing available to him: my nipple. I got purple-nurpled by my baby. FML
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Top comments
allmidnighteyes 10
Om nom nom chips > Women fo real
thewonkits 0
I saw a British guy eating Pringles on youtube once. That is my argument.
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Comments (97)
shoshizzle 0
This sucks but YDI.
glitchead 0
munchies:1 love:0
snoopy2010 0
Seriously? This is an FML? How the heck did this get approved? "Oh no, my little boy was hungry and reached for chips..." No. Just no. This is why we need a "NOT AN FML" option. And you can't use the defense that it was funny (non FML-s are allowed if they provide comedy), because...it wasn't. I almost want to believe this is a troll FML.
mike1921 0
This, seriously , this was boring and not in the slightest bit even remotely bad.
Nyrus13 4
Stfu
Lovebug27 0
I agree wit #16
atb12688 0
Trolls suck.
kissesinbetween 0
Not exactly a FML, but funny.
anonacs 0
**** you.
teasecake 0
ydi for making him a fatty.
Lovebug27 0
#26 your calling yourself a fatty buy saying that becuase I know you've had at least one chip in your lifetime
myhairynutsack 0
Not an FML, Not funny, Not anything. I wasted my time reading this garbage. We need a LAME option.
littlerock_fml 0
If your time is so valuable, why are you spending it on FMylife?