Love and Animals: Today, getting home after a long day of work, my boyfriend came...

By susiedoggles - 05/11/2018 08:00 - United States - Milford

Today, getting home after a long day of work, my boyfriend came running out of the house. Being silly, I thought he was excited to see me. Nope - he was excited to show me the squirrel he shot. In the house. Apparently, we have house squirrels and a boatload of holes in the floor and couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 029

You deserved it 312

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Same thing different taste

It's alive!

By notmyrealname123 - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - Canada - Kitchener

Today, I found my cat downstairs with a squirrel dangling from his mouth. When I saw this, I yelled at my cat to put it down. He did. Turns out the squirrel was still alive and run. I had to spend the next three hours chasing it out of my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 029

You deserved it 6 589

By Anonymous - 28/02/2010 11:16 - Canada

Today, a wild squirrel managed to get into my house. I can't see him… but I can hear him in the walls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 157

You deserved it 2 614

Pest control

By sigh - 13/04/2016 02:10 - United States - Charlotte

Today, my new neighbor offered to "humanely capture and relocate" the squirrels in my attic. He then "humanely" shot at them with a BB gun, and the "relocated" them into his stomach once they were killed. Welcome to the neighborhood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 814

You deserved it 2 538

By JK - 01/02/2010 00:24 - United States

Today, my boyfriend admitted that he'd like to dress me in a squirrel suit and chase me through the forest. This was the surprising result of a discussion on how to spice up our love life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 975

You deserved it 4 732

By Sid - 10/04/2011 00:58 - United States

Today, my dog was barking at a squirrel in the yard. I opened the door to let him chase the squirrel. I went to look at the dead squirrel and found out it was the neighbor's chihuahua. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 704

You deserved it 41 779

By ghoul - 08/03/2011 11:32

Today, I found a dead squirrel under my son's bed. Apparently, he has been keeping it there as a "pet" for the past week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 860

You deserved it 4 243

By Anonymous - 11/05/2014 22:49 - United States - Belmont

Today, I walked outside to see my boyfriend standing on my porch, looking confused. He explained to me that he had attached a prom proposal note to his pet rabbit, and let it inside my house to find me. We went looking for said rabbit, and found my dog halfway through eating it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 346

You deserved it 5 431

Usually a bad omen

By Karen - 21/05/2023 06:00

Today, my boyfriend finally moved in with me, after being long distance for months. Our apartment just became infested with mice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 719

You deserved it 103

By RENThead - 13/09/2015 19:02 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was walking down a path in the woods behind my house when I saw a squirrel. It ran away, but little did I know it wasn't running from me, it was running from the dog that had forced Animal Control to sweep the area. I ended up with stitches in my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 873

You deserved it 1 607

By madisonbubch - 23/09/2014 01:04 - United States - Vine Grove

Today, I got home from a long day at work, hoping to just fix dinner and relax, only to find that my cat had come into the house with a rabbit, and is now stuck underneath the cabinet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 926

You deserved it 3 078

BurnInDemonFire 35

Saturday 20 October 2018 23:30

I can see why you have squirrels in your house. Your boyfriend is nuts.

Emma Marshall 19

Sunday 21 October 2018 3:51

Why would anyone brag about killing something

Comments

BurnInDemonFire 35

Saturday 20 October 2018 23:30

I can see why you have squirrels in your house. Your boyfriend is nuts.

Emma Marshall 19

Sunday 21 October 2018 3:51

Why would anyone brag about killing something

loliloveoniichan 14

Monday 5 November 2018 16:46

When I was a kid I used to brag when I killed lizards and animals like that, it was a amazing childhood xD. I still don't see the problem with killing a squirrel.

interesting33 36

Monday 5 November 2018 18:18

but why would you kill the lizard?

BurnInDemonFire 35

Monday 5 November 2018 22:51

Are you OP's boyfriend?

loliloveoniichan 14

Saturday 24 August 2019 19:19

Nope , are you?

A Frenchy in Eire 31

Monday 5 November 2018 15:39

This guy is one of the many reasons why the US needs gun control.

Glowworm56 26

Monday 5 November 2018 15:58

Does he use antlers in all of his decorating too?

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Monday 5 November 2018 22:40

If shooting innocent animals gets him excited, I think you need a new boyfriend.

BeachMammal 8

Tuesday 6 November 2018 5:38

There's something very wrong with him.

Clay Baker 3

Friday 9 November 2018 17:32

City folks don’t understand hunting you can’t just grab a squirrel u need to kill it and can’t leave it in the house they carry rabies

IHaveThePower 16

Wednesday 11 January 2023 6:03

You've never actually figured out the difference between a rabid and non-rabid animal, have you? I mean, squirrels are good sacrifices to bind and control the Evil Overlord Of All Furry Rodents, but people used to EAT those little bastards without any problems. Rabies is scary, but also fairly distinctive, and squirrels who look cute at you probably just want the hooman to feed them.